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Entries Tagged as 'Field Reports'

Why You Don’t Pick Up Drunk Girls

April 12th, 2008 10 Comments

We’re making out on the couch. Victory is looming. Then it happens.
“Umm, where’s your bathroom” she asks
“Just down the hall on the left” I reply
She gets up and starts running. I ponder why the rush and then it hits me. Oh Jesus God NO! In that split second, time freezes [...]

Tags: Field Reports

The Mr. Bubble Number Close

March 23rd, 2008 15 Comments

She is sitting on a stool next to a raffle table filled with various Easter baskets. She’s listening to the band. She has that sexy punk rocker girl look. She’s the most attractive girl in the bar. She also has at least twelve other guys staring at her, each of them [...]

Tags: Field Reports

How NOT to Seduce a Stripper

March 18th, 2008 12 Comments

7:00 PM
I’m sitting in my favorite ugly green chair, writing and listening to the torrential rain slapping down against the window behind me. It’s Saturday and I can’t think of anything to write about. I don’t feel like going out. The thought of trekking to a bar and getting soaked didn’t seem [...]

Tags: Field Reports

The Creep and the Cougar

March 1st, 2008 7 Comments

Standing to my right is a disheveled drunken 22 year old guy. A bartender plops down a plate of barbecue and jalapeƱo fries in front of him which he begins devouring at a voracious pace. Not bothering with the provided utensils, he reaches down and clutches a chunk of drippy messy fries and [...]

Tags: Field Reports

Post Season Pick Up Artist

October 24th, 2007 5 Comments

I’m standing atop a wooden bench in the back of the pub looking out over a sea of drunken Red Sox fans. The crowd is rowdy and everyone is getting fired up. People are chanting and yelling at the screen. It’s fantastic.
Standing to my right are two cute girls, one of whom [...]

Tags: Field Reports