Best Examples of Cocky Funny: The Aunt Jemima Treatment

by Matt Savage

Chicks dig me because I rarely wear underwear, and when I do, it’s usually something unusual.” – Bill Murray

When most guys get into the Game, one of the first things they usually learn about is the concept of “Cocky Funny.” The idea of cocky funny, coined by David Deangelo, is a type of banter or flirting that’s used in order to create attraction and is something that we can often observe in guys who are naturally good with women. It’s a refined mixture of subtle arrogance, wit, charm and sexual innuendo.

The problem that most average frustrated chumps have when first attempting a cocky funny attitude is that they come off more of a confrontational jerk than a playful flirtatious seducer. The trick to figuring out how it’s supposed to look is to learn by example. And, in my opinion, one of the best examples is Bill Murray.

With the exception of Carl Spackler, most of Murray’s characters are prime examples of the cocky funny mantra; one of my favorites being the above video of the Aunt Jemima Treatment from the movie Stripes.

Here’s another great example from Groundhog Day:

Notice how he’s not being a complete dick, yet is still able to convey that subtle arrogance in a flirtatious funny way, all while being upfront about his sexual intent. This is how it’s done.

By the way, for those that own the Stripes DVD, there’s a great deleted scene which shows a good example of Cocky Funny in the bedroom with a very hot and naked P.J. Soles (the girl in the Aunt Jemima Treatment video).

{ 11 comments }

Kyle October 6, 2010 at 8:04 am

Obviously the game that I’ve never been able to master….maybe its my use of “poopy” that keeps tripping me up.

Alex Fairfield October 7, 2010 at 1:56 pm

The cocky/funny ruse is DeAngelo’s sale job. There are no “techniques,” only aspects of one’s self to emphasize and those to deemphasize when targeting a chick. Does anyone think Murray consciously adopted cocky/funny in these clips? It’s just him, who he is.

Matt Savage October 8, 2010 at 9:25 am

Alex,
I wasn’t trying to imply that David Deangelo created the cocky funny attitude, just saying that he gave it a name. As you rightly point out, I’m sure Bill Murray has no idea of the term cocky funny, yet he still demonstrates the concept brilliantly since that is his own comedic style. Whatever you want to call it, it’s still an attractive playful alpha attitude that works well with with women.

Alex Fairfield October 8, 2010 at 11:46 am

But Matt the way both you and David present the concept, it is an attitude to be adopted or (in David’s case) to be taught and sold–a coat to be put on and worn around town. I prefer to phrase it differently: what uniquely playful and seductive aspects of every man–aspects which they already possess–can be brought forth when encountering a woman?

Matt Savage October 8, 2010 at 12:29 pm

Alex,
Are you saying that people cannot develop new and different attitudes?

I agree that whatever seductive aspect a man may already posses should be highlighted or enhanced, essentially a “be your best self” strategy. Though the reason I put forth the cocky funny attitude as something that can be adopted is because I believe it can be. Is it not unreasonable to think that a person can’t actively change their attitude? In my opinion, yes people can change themselves and their attitudes with learning and practice. After all, Bill Murray didn’t become a comedic genius overnight, it was something that he practiced day in and day out over many years.

A good example is my best friend whom six years ago was very shy and rather boring in the conversation department. And for whatever reasons, over the following years decided that he was going to be more of an out-going person. Today, he’s one of the funniest and talkative guys I know. His attitude has done a complete 180.

As far as David Deangelo goes, yes, he does sell an ebook which it’s main concept is based around learning the cock funny attitude. He’s a businessman, he sells stuff, that’s what he does; but it doesn’t make the concepts portrayed in that product any less viable as a useful seduction method.

Likewise, I recognize that this attitude isn’t the only seductive attitude one can have, there are other types, yet this particular one has proven that it can be learned and that it is effective.

Alex Fairfield October 12, 2010 at 12:22 pm

All fair points, Matt. And I’m not saying that men cannot develop new and different attitudes. I am saying that when the urge to do so is levered by a pitchman (“striking out with women? Why that’s because you don’t have what it takes. Let me show you what it takes–oh and by the way you can pull out your wallet?”) instead of genuine self discovery, the results are often, shall we say, mixed.

Yes, women do enjoy, and are often drawn to, a confident man. At the same time, after the age of about 19, they become bloodhounds at sniffing out insincerity. Did you friend change suddenly because he just “decided” to do something different or because listened to himself in a way that allowed his personality to evolve naturally?

My point is that I don’t like approaches to dating that begin by disempowering men, i.e., by telling them they aren’t good enough to get a woman and need to change to do so. It’s b.s. and, exploits weakness. But then again, that is the basis of most of the commerce in this country constructed around the issue, from hair implants to muscle and nutritional products to guys like DeAngelo.

Matt Savage October 13, 2010 at 1:11 pm

Alex,
I’m not sure “exploiting weakness” is the term I would use, yet it seems more like a wake-up call than anything. Granted, DeAngelo and other seduction community gurus do have a spammy way of marketing but selling a book based on changing ones attitude/behavior/outlook is no different than other self-help gurus that sell similar behavioral changing books like Wayne Dyer, Eckhart Tolle or Tony Robbins. Does that mean they are exploiting peoples weaknesses? Perhaps, but it does seem that there are people who read their works and are able to gain something of value from them.

And of course, people certainly can learn through self-discovery or trial and error, but I find it much easier to learn something from someone else who has already figured it out.

A good example is when I started learning to play the ukulele. I could have tried to figure this out “naturally” through trial and error, though that would have certainly taken me a lonnnnggg time to figure out rather than what I did do; which was to go buy an instructional DVD, a book filled with ukulele song tabs and recently pay for one on one lessons. To say the least, the progress I’ve made in learning how to play has been much faster than had I just tried to figure it out by genuine self discovery.

As for my friend, his progress, at least in the initial phases did not appear natural at all, in fact, they were quite awkward and brutal to watch. Now though, he does appear natural in his socializing but it wouldn’t have been for that tough period of pushing through all those awkward moments.

It seems your major qualm is that there are people selling products which you perceive as somehow taking advantage of people, by proclaiming their product(s) as some sort of magic bullet. I somewhat agree; there are a lot of hucksters in the seduction community, but believe it or not, there are some guys that do put out some quality information. And obviously, a lot of that information could be found for free all over the Internet, but some people like to have the convenience of a well organized and structured book.

Finally, in my opinion, the idea of “genuine self discovery” seems to pretty much rely on luck or stumbling upon the proper path. To me, this seems far less likely to get the desired results than someone who is actively learning and practicing a new attitude or behavior, but that’s just me :)

Cailin December 3, 2010 at 4:06 pm

I have always loved Bill Murray. He perfectly embodies what you PUAs call “cocky funny”. It remains attractive with age too – I still completely identified with ScaJo in Lost in Translation.

Zach March 29, 2011 at 4:38 pm

So what did she mean in the first video by “I’m not enjoying this. Now quit it!” while smiling? We were told at university in the 90′s that “no means no”. This is an example of what I’ve found to be one of the most confusing aspects of male-female interactions.

Roy | Cruisesurfingz May 19, 2011 at 8:36 pm

Now I’m inspired to try this!

Brandon December 20, 2012 at 2:40 pm

Zach, two points.

1., A human’s body language tells the truth more often than its words. She said, “I’m not enjoying this,” but she clearly was having more fun in his presence than she’d be having in his absence.

2., He DID stop what he was doing, immediately after she said, “Now quit it!” He put down the bread roller and picked up an ice cream spoon.

Now that I’m thinking about it more, it occurs to me how brilliant that move was. There are many ways of dealing with LMR (last minute resistance), and that was an example of some LMR that a weaker man would’ve misinterpreted.

A lesser man would’ve stopped, meekly apologized, and maybe left without a kiss.
Bill Murray, the Shakespeare of Sarcasm, discontinues the tactic (tickling her with bread roller) but persists with his overall strategy (moving her to the bedroom). She cheerfully followed his dominant lead.

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