It’s been four days of abstaining from masturbation and I feel like I’m going to explode. The first day is always the hardest, days two and three usually aren’t bad, but once you get to day four the buildup of sexual tension begins to bear down so much that the slightest breeze is cause enough for an erection. Why put myself through this torture? Simple, to understand the effects that male masturbation has on his ability to attract women.
It’s a self experiment, let me explain. There is a theory floating around that basically says that if a man abstains from ejaculating he will be more likely to pursue and attract females. There are a few different thoughts on why people might believe this, ranging from fluctuating testosterone levels to general horniness. Lets explore further, shall we.
Personal Masturbation Experiment
During the last year, I’ve been attempting to go on and off in my personal masturbation habits. Some weeks, I try to abstain from wanking and some weeks I treat my body like my own personal amusement park. Obviously, abstaining from masturbation is the more difficult of the two tasks, however, with a little will power I managed to pull off a week of no ejaculating here and there, enough to make some general observations about my behavior as it relates to the dating world.
The first noticeable observation when abstaining from masturbation was that I was definitely more horny. No big surprise there. However, I believe that having that feeling of pent up sexual tension helped me to approach and talk to more women, as well as be more sexual around them. For instance, as opposed to approaching and having a casual friendly conversation, I was likely to use more sexual innuendos and be more direct about my intentions.
The second big observation from abstinence was my level of motivation. Not just motivation to go out and meet women, but my motivation to do other productive things in life, like exercising or writing for example. This was the complete opposite of weeks where I masturbated on a frequent basis. I’d just sit around the house all day watching TV, surfing the web and…uhh masturbating.
Effects of Ejaculation on Testosterone and Sexual Activity
What is testosterone?
a potent androgenic hormone produced chiefly by the testes; responsible for the development of male secondary sex characteristics
Essentially, testosterone is what helps make a man a man. It’s responsible for developing muscle and overall body fitness, not an unusual trait in an alpha male. Also, it helps to charge the male libido and sex drive.
So what’s testosterone have to do with masturbation? Testosterone is produced in the testicles and when you ejaculate you are releasing or using up some of that testosterone. This is fine when you are having intercourse with your desired partner, that is the whole point after all, but not fine when a chronic masturbation habit is leaving you drained of testosterone and limiting you from your true sexual potential.
In 2003, there was a research study done on the testosterone levels in males during certain periods of abstaining from ejaculation. It found that there was a gradual increase in testosterone levels during the first five days but on days six and seven there was a huge spike, up to a 147% increase in testosterone on day seven. After day seven, testosterone levels returned to normal, thus indicating that seven days is the effective number of days to abstain from ejaculating in order to hit peak levels of testosterone.
In another paper published in the Scandinavian Journal of Psychology, a group of male rats was studied during post-ejaculation and sexual exhaustion phases. One of their findings was that, after 4 days, only 63% of the males were able to show sexual behavior while after 7 days all males were getting it on in a giant rodent orgy. Again, this indicating that seven days is the optimal time between male ejaculation periods.
From my personal experience, I’ve noticed that usually between days five and seven of abstinence, are also the days when I’m able to get more make-outs or bring women home, usually as a result of being more motivated to sexually escalate those interactions.
The Loaded Gun Theory
If you’ve ever watched the movie, “Something About Mary”, you may remember the following infamous scene:
The Loaded Gun Theory states that by masturbating before going out to meet women will leave you calm and relaxed as opposed to nervous. Supposedly, this calm and relaxed state will keep you from doing something stupid and hence aid in the attraction process.
In my opinion, this is the wrong way to look at this. You want to have a loaded gun! You are an alpha male, you are a hunter in search of your prey. The nervousness only comes from the stereotypical Ben Stiller character and not the extra baby batter. If anything, the pent up sexual demand seems like it would make you more confident and motivated in your female interactions.
The Seinfeld Abstinence Theory
In one episode of Seinfeld, George quits having sex because his girlfriend has mono. This now lack of sex causes George to become motivated to learn and turns into a genius. The theory being that without the distraction of sex on a man’s brain, he’s able to focus his thoughts on other more productive pursuits.
I think this theory only has it half right. I don’t agree that abstinence will relieve the distraction of sex, but will actually amplify it, at least in the short term. As someone who has gone for more than seven days without ejaculating, I know that it’s almost impossible not to think about sex. However, despite that sex will likely always be a distraction for any red blooded male, it doesn’t mean that there isn’t an underlying psychological self improvement motivation factor involved in abstinence. I’ll talk more about this next.
Effects of Ejaculation on Dopamine Levels
What is dopamine?
a monoamine neurotransmitter found in the brain and essential for the normal functioning of the central nervous system
Dopamine has many functions in the brain, including important roles in behavior and cognition, motor activity, motivation and reward, inhibition ofprolactin production, sleep, mood, attention, and learning.
Essentially dopamine, manufactured in the brain, has a whole bunch roles in how our nervous system works. It’s also particularly important in orgasms. When we ejaculate our brain releases a bunch of dopamine acting like a euphoric drug producing an orgasm. However, as the above definition states it also effects the function of other areas of the nervous system which are vital to our daily living like sleep, mood, learning, motivation etc.
Dopamine as stated above, is used by our bodies as a reward mechanism. For instance, when we eat something that tastes good, our brain rewards us by releasing a small amount of dopamine, thus helping to create and reinforce behavior which the body believes is good for you. The same is true of sex, as human beings we are hard wired to procreate. And the only way to procreate is to pursue sex with the opposite gender, which we will be rewarded by a huge release of dopamine (an orgasm) when successful.
It’s also important to note that when dopamine levels are low and depleted, it will have an adverse effect on other areas of the central nervous system which rely on dopamine to function properly. For example, in one study published in the American Journal of Psychology, it showed the effects of male volunteers who had their dopamine levels deliberately depleted over a 42 hour period of time. During that 42 hours, the normally healthy social males experienced negative symptoms like obsessive-compulsiveness, thought disorders, social anxiety and depression.
So, one could say that too much ejaculation, to the point of depleting your dopamine levels on a regular basis, is going to have an adverse effect on your daily lifestyle.
Savage’s Theory of Behavioral Ejaculation Reinforcement
If a man is motivated and pursues the act of becoming an alpha male, he will attract desirable females. This eventually leads to sexual intercourse with those desirable females and is rewarded with orgasms. This reward reinforces the alpha male behavior that was needed to attract a desirable female in the first place, prompting the male to continue the traits that helped him become alpha, thus perpetuating the cycle and continuing the supply of desirable mates.
If a man is lazy, unmotivated and relies on masturbation as his main form of sexual activity, he is unnaturally creating a false reward for traits that are undesirable in potential female mates. This false reward tricks the body into thinking that it is pursuing alpha male qualities when in reality it is pursuing beta male qualities. This cycle also perpetuates itself by continually being satisfied with the act of masturbation rather than the pursuit of desirable females.
Conclusions on Male Masturbation
If you are still with me, you probably might think I am completely against male masturbation, but I’m not. For one, this is a very debatable topic and I’m sure many readers will offer up evidence supporting masturbation as perfectly natural and acceptable, and please by all means add to this conversation, as I am very much in pursuit of truth like any one else.
For now though, I’m sticking to my theory that regular masturbation on a daily basis will have an adverse effect on my ability to attract women. So, I’m personally sticking to the “7 day cycle.” The concept is that I abstain from masturbating and if I haven’t had sexual intercourse within seven days, then I’m allowed to masturbate and relieve myself. This allows for the testosterone and sexual motivation to increase throughout the week and hopefully peak around the weekend when I’m more likely to be out on the prowl.
Has anyone else experimented or noticed any personal changes when abstaining from masturbation for a long period of time? Any other thoughts, opinions, criticisms, verbal lashings? Leave ‘em below in the comments. And if nothing else, please think of the kittens:)
Update May 1st, 2009 – I have written a follow-up to this post here: Misconceptions of Male Abstinence and Ejaculation Theory
{ 224 comments… read them below or add one }
Nice! But man, a whole week, seriously? Dude…
A friend of ours went to a spiritual retreat in India a year ago and was telling us about it… and he said there were no phones, no email, and no sex allowed. Then he turns to me and me and says… ” and no masturbation either!” Darn it. He and Jennifer both agree I’d get booted pretty fast.
I just want to add this… for all the guys masturbating without lubricant, do yourself a giant favor and get some lube. seriousl, you’ll be glad you did.
If you’re not sure what lubes are for or which to go with, check out our recent video on this: The Lube Review (What Everyone Ought to Know About Sexual Lubricants).
Have an awesome day!
– Dan
Masturbation is a natural thing yes. Just like, releasing stress through other activities, this is just as comparable. Although, I do agree with the fact that the more you masturbate, the more you become complacent.
That in turn will lead to being naturally less attractive. If you hold out, like Savage is saying, it will increase your motivation, and (reading this somewhere) will release more pheromones on your body when you go out and meet women – and women will instinctively pick this up.
I say the odds are in your favor when you masturbate less. But in the end, if it doesn’t work out for you that weekend or night, you should release yourself and try it again.
Eventually, it’ll become a cycle and it won’t hinder your general lifestyle. I’m hoping all of this made some sense…
A side note here… If you want to attract women, you have to believe down to your core that you’ve got something worth buying so to speak – you have to accept yourself and nurture – and radiate – a true inner confidence.
THAT is absolutely magnetic. Any good salesman will tell you that you can’t sell something you don’t believe in, at least not well.
And be aware of how you make people feel, that’s what they remember most about you, how they felt at the time. If they’re happy, laugh, and have a great time, guess who’s going on a second date.
– Dan
About 2 years ago I wasn’t getting laid. I had lost my virginity a year prior, so I had the taste, but couldnt close the deal in the new enviroment (college).
I went over 3 months, yes 3 months, without busting a nut (I had maybe 3 or 4 make outs during that time, nothing beyond that with women).
After the first week, I was more motivated to go out, and did so accordingly. After the first 3 weeks, motivation amped up even higher, including in the gym.
After about 5 weeks…well it was all downhill from there.
That motivation turned to eagerness, and in turn I became nervous and jerky (and walked around with a woody every time I saw a hot chick).
So ya, a short story I thought Id share! (note-began getting laid about 3 months after this little abstinence).
-Dream
Some boxers try to abstain from sex or masterbation in the months and weeks leading up to their fights. This increases testosterone and pisses them off b/c they aren’t getting any pussy.
Athletes have long tried to abstain from sexual activities before games perhaps because of the dopamine levels.
There was another episode of Seinfeld, or perhaps the same one, where Elaine was dating a musician. She witheld sex from him for a while, and when she finally gave in he started sucking it up on stage.
@ Dan,
Yea dude, 7 days is tough, but I think once you get used to it, it’s not soo bad. I don’t know what you have to worry about, don’t you have the lovely Jennifer to take care of your needs:)
@ Infinity,
I do think it’s a natural instinct to masturbate, but doing so on such a frequent basis, as in once or twice a day doesn’t seem natural to me especially if one is masturbating to porn or other such visuals that lets say a caveman wouldn’t have had access to.
@ Dream,
Wow, three months is crazy! It’s interesting to note that you said after 5 weeks it all went downhill. I suspect that there is definitely some sort of interval period where a guy just has to ejaculate.
@ Chuck,
Yes, this is another topic that has been widely debated specifically by top end athletes. I know that Mohamed Ali used to abstain from any kind of sex or masturbation for a month before any of his fights.
I believe the Seinfeld you are talking about was the same episode, but it was an unlicensed doctor who she withheld sex until he passed to doctor exam. As a result she had the opposite symptoms as George, becoming really stupid because the bags of trash were piling up in her head.
I can say that I do not have too much trouble not masterbating. There have been periods where I have gone longer that 7 days, mainly because my mind is focused on other things.
Although I do wonder if having an hot girlfriend makes me calmer and looking for the next day to unload.
This site has a number of articles that describe the so-called “neurochemical hangover” after orgasm, and the interplay between dopamine and prolactin, a hormone related to feelings of stress and irritability, and the likely culprit behind post-coital male laziness and female bitchiness.
These guys quote a hangover period of two weeks for recovering addicts, which I guess are guys who want to swear off orgasm forever… (?) This is apparently how long it takes for prolactin levels to return to normal. After that, the authors of the site recommend something called karezza, which seems to be a technique for delaying orgasm, wrapped in a bunch of new-age and Hindu spirituality jargon.
I’ve personally found that my most “on” nights in recent memory have occurred after between 7 and 10 days of will-powered abstinence. It’s a tough hill to climb, but the view from the top and the subsequent tumble down are pretty awesome.
Hey man,
Interesting theory, it may be that I have much higher levels of testosterone than most guys, but I’ve tried the abstain from jerking thing for about a month at a time and saw REALLY bad results similar to what Dream experienced, I was so nervous around girls, and horny it was EXTREMELY physically uncomfortable.
There’s also a decent amount of medical literature that suggest daily ejaculation protects the prostate from cancer.
My 2C.
Good to see some real research into something most guys just blindly follow.
Best,
S
If I am understanding this correctly you lose your built of testosterone when you ejaculate. With that being said, men don’t have to actually ejaculate to orgasm; you could masturbate without actually “blowing a load”.
I remembered back to the concept of being a male and stacking orgasms. A friend of mine not to long ago showed me a book that he had found about being better in bed (I can’t remember the title of the book to save my life). One of the sections was about increasing stamina and being able to have multiple orgasms. The basis of the technique is to be able to reach climax and then halt your bodily reaction by flexing your PC muscle.
The PC muscle is a thin strip of muscle in your falice. The muscle is used to push the flow of sperm through and out. A secondary use of this muscle (which the technique is derived from) is when you stop yourself from peeing. For instance, you have a great urge to pee but you aren’t by a bathroom and you flex your lower torso and you feel constriction on your penis. You are flexing you PC muscle and stopping the flow of urine. The entire technique is based off the flexing of the PC muscle. The process was you use is based off a scale of pleasure from 1-5 (now these stages are general feelings that you decide for yourself). I vaguely remember the steps but they were as follow:
1. Erection
2. Begining of sex/masturbation
3. Starting to feel pleasure.
4. Mid-range pleasure.
5. Climax
This technique takes practice to “perfect” so you are recommended to start at a lower level to strengthen your PC muscle. The recommended starting point of the technique is Stage 3. Once you achieve stage 3 you are supposed to flex your PC muscle. Now this can be achieved by either by flexing your muscle as you were to stop yourself from peeing or to firmly grasp for penis under the head and squeeze. If you do the latter of the two practices you will need to add enough pressure that you experience a receding feeling. After doing this you may be less erect and will need to work it back up. Now you repeat this process a few times and then move on and do it at stage 4 a few times. After you get a hang of slowing the flood flow and build up you procede to the final phase. You continue sex/masturbation until you are almost at the tip of climax and then repeat the step above. If done properly you will actually have a slight orgasm. You may excrete a small amount of semen, but you will not completely ejaculate. After this is done you can procede to have sex for theoretically as long as you want, because it will take a fair amount of work for your body to build up another ejaculation.
This technique given, I believe it would be possible to masturbate and not lose your testoterone because you aren’t fully ejaculating. If everytime you masturbated you did this you should retain your testoterone. If that is the case its a win-win situation, you can still masturbate have an orgasm and keep your manly chemicals.
Great article. What I think deserves kudos is the attention to personal, empirical observations. I’ll throw a few of mine own personal observations out there just to add to the discussion:
- After abstaining from 4-5 days, I’m definitely hornier and feel greater incentive to go out and meet girls
- Like someone else mentioned, I think I perform less well around girls when having abstained (Loaded Gun Theory) because I’m much more anxious. The lack of masturbation makes me want to go out, but I lose my social finesse; if I whack it before a first date, I’m MUCH calmer and things always go smoothly. (And I wait until Date #2 to physically assert myself with the girl anyway.)
— Although a lack of masturbation causes me to do worse around women when I’m out, a higher frequency of real sex causes me to do much better; there is an added element of confidence that is missing from the former and present with the latter
— To further my point, there must be a further physical difference between masturbation and real sex. My own observation is that after masturbation I feel tired and empty; after real sex I feel tired and emotionally very happy. Obviously some chemical is causing this difference
- Masturbation, esp daily, leaves me feel tired, washed out, and unmotivated. Though it’s fun at the moment, I lose both my productive momentum and my initiative to pursue other pastimes. I think, if I remember right, there was a chapter on this phenomenon in “Think and Grow Rich.” During periods of abstinence, I feel a drive and creativity that, when applied to a project or pursuit, leads to both a sense of accomplishment and real accomplishment
- Too much internet porn over time has actually become boring to me. There is so much pussy on the tube that I literally started getting bored looking at pretty, naked girls – this alarming fact is what ultimately led me to try to reduce my masturbation frequency
- Also alarming is that it seems over a long period of time, I sort of psychologically duped myself into pursuing less attractive girls in the real world because I knew I could see hot girls on the net
- After 5 or so days of abstaining, I noticed that sex became less important to me (seemingly following the 7 day graph above). After about 5 days, I felt almost asexual
Actually, the more I do it the more apt I’m am to be horny for more. When I haven’t been laid in a while, it’s not a big deal. But once I get it, gotta have more.
I don’t know if I’ve ever really done your experiment justice, but in my experience with masturbation, I’ve had very different results.
There were a couple of stretches in college where I had temporary long distance situations or I was on campus during a break when most other people weren’t where I was pretty much cooped up in my room all day by myself bored. As a result I had stretches of multiple days in a row where I would crank it literally 5-8 times a day. I found that i would actually become horny more easily after a point, like my testosterone levels were elevated to a sexually aroused state and never really went down, or maybe my body was depleting testosterone too quickly and as a result it started overproducing testosterone. I’ve had similar experiences when I have been in relationships and done like a weekend by ourselves etc. I suppose it could also be due to some kind of addiction biology. Just theories, I obviously wasn’t measuring test levels in the blood, but that was definitely my experience.
Fascinating stuff….TMI though
Whats your opinion on masturbating to porn?
Ive gone under the believe that it creates a mind attachment to the future and keeps you out of your body. So when you hit the field your body is in the future predicting sex and in the past guilty of masturbating all at the site of the beautiful woman(women) simultaneously. Get back to on that.
Plus ive noticed i stopped masturbating for months at a time and my body was insanely silly and powerful and i was so sexual id feel like a sexual chocolate strawberry while in class. But ay thats just me.
My experience goes according to the diagram of testosterone levels. Without realising it, after I got broadband internet, I developed a porn addiction and I would masturbate daily, or every other day. Once I realised it actually made me feel bad and “drained out” I decided to go on abstinence for as long as I could. The first days were like hell, but after 6-7 days, I stopped having the urge to masturbate and got more energetic with everyday activities.
What was surprising to me was that after the first peak, as the weeks went by, I never felt the strong sexual “urge” to masturbate nor was I really horny. I didn’t even have morning erections and that got me worried. Just before I hit the 2 months mark, I masturbated just to make sure I was still able to do it properly. And it went fine. From then on I kept for the most part a 1 per week schedule which seems to be working the best in terms of relieving me and letting me feel drained out.
I was talking to Ron Jeremy once and had a crazy conversation with him…Anyway, he told me at one point that Peter North would be celibate for an entire month before doing a scene and this is one of the main reasons he is able to do his “epic” money shots…Don’t know if I could ever go a month without sex or jerkin’ it though…Luckily I haven’t really had to do that
This was a fantastic read that I can sincerely relate to.
I have already attempted my own abstinence regiment before reading this, and can honestly say that I am a much more out going guy a few days after my last ejaculation. A man can really feel good about himself if he doesn’t masturbate. Of course, I’m comparing the progress that I have made to what I used to be; which was a chronic masturbating teen.
Ever since I stopped masturbating every day, everything in my life has improved. My confidence, my body, and my overall enjoyment of life has increased ten fold from what it used to be. I still masturbate occasionally, and will try your routine— “The Seven Day Cycle”.
I really liked your article, and will be checking in to see what else you write.
Great stuff DUDE!
I will try a report back..I remember after awhile i couldnt do it cause my parents house and psycologically drained that I wasnt thinking about it.my verbals and swagger was more calibrated with my interaction…women have radars on their fucking heads
I totally agree with the theories presented at the very top. I had notice some time ago the effects of masturbating and not masturbating, and true as it is on the fourth day it becomes really hard not to masturbate. All those testosteroens are building-up and it must be releases however I have notice in m own body the changes that occur while I abstain from masturbating. I become more active, I exercise more, I also concentrate more and emotionally I feel better although I do go up in flames if I see a hot girl walk by, nonetheless my mood and stamina increase during the days of abstinence.
And I most certainly agree that as my testosterones accumulate so those my desire to sexually interact with the female gender, instead of being neutral and talk about usual daily things I flirt much more and feel more sexually excited meaning my confidence rises and so does the urge to hunt for “prey” lol
Funny enough, when you masturbate your testosterone levels go down, but when you have sex, they dont. Theres a study on this, but I couldnt find it to link it here.
Actually, when you are having regular frequent sex, your testosterone goes up.
So how can the body tell the difference between ejaculating during intercourse or doing it to porn?
Germanico, it could be psychological. But then again there could be some mechanism that identifies two type of ejaculation. As I mentioned before, I feel more energetic and my test go up during abstinence but all of this had occured long before I had any knowledge of it, it was until recent that
I had discovered what many others experienced and knew. However in my personal experience having sex and ejaculating result in the same “drainage” only difference is that physical interaction is psychologically more rewarding.
In that “take the bullet out of the chamber” movie the guy was giving the protagonist BAD ADVICE because he was also after the same girl.
Yes, it is better to go out with a loaded gun.
And speak to women! Make approaches, accept social risks, escalate, and let her hold that gun. Let her start imagining firing that big loaded gun.
And do not eject without rejection.
Jerking off should be the embarrassing consolation prize that you give yourself after going out and making 100 approaches.
Really a week without masturbating? That’s easy. Longest I’ve been without masturbating was 8 weeks. Yes, 8 weeks! Why you ask? Just to see could I beat my old record of 6 weeks.
Listen up hunks! Act like a man and start developing self control. you know life without masturbation has much more interesting things to offer. Each and every person masturbates once in his lifetime. This takes place mostly due to peer pressure, stimulation and loss of self control. Discovering masturbation is completely normal and natural, but continuing or practicing it as a habit is totally abnormal and risky. We guys are always interested in girls! this is perfectly natural and cannot be abstained from. but listen up guys, only those boys are preferred by girls who abstain from masturbation. the consequences of masturbation are numerous and benefits are NONE!
i have to concur that after a couple of days of fighting the urge to jerk off, i am far more direct and willing to make sexual innuendo with the women I meet. I also, however, find myself more willing to eject when logistics and/or her feedback does not seem like SNL noise on my radar.
I have experience. Masturbating is very dangerous. I was masturbating for more than 20 years and i regret it. Now i have health problem ,headach,chronic fatigue,chronic bachach, flu,cough,problem witheyes, memory problems, impotence, …all kind of disorder.
In the beginning you can not notice it. in beginning(one year,two,three,four,five…) at end of the day ,you will regret.
modest
I keep experimenting with this idea and I find that the advantages of not masturbating outweigh masturbating even though occasionally you can be a little too high energy.
For me i want to know one thing .How to stop with this humiliating and bad habit of mastabating? I have mastubated for years , But i assure ,you come to know about the consequenses of the habit when it is too late
Now how to stop? How to stop?
claude
I have a feeling modest and claude are the same person…
Anyway great article dude I’m gonna try this cycle starting… tomorrow
Is there any difference if your GF jerks you off? I’m either screwing her or shes jerking me off or blowing me on a daily basis. Is the testosterone effect the same?
I’m a doctor and although I prefer not to provide such private information on a site such as this for better reasons that to do so still, it seems that its better to explain about this topic once and for all. Have you ever hear of the two sayings one by the church and the other by non veteran doctors that; age of consent for sexual … is 16 years of age for boy and girls and that, masturbation is good for people since blah blah since why its is not important when it is not important to do so at all. The thing is that, the church wants you not love people men and woman too much since if you did you actually is loving god less and this is it all what the Bible (A pointless book with better alternatives for it) is saying about this but christianity is a bad religion to start with. Secondly, if you did obey the age of consent law then the only way to although badly mimic the conditions where you have broken that law is to masturbate. Here is the point though, if you have had done so brocken that particular law then, you will today stand up as a winner living at the top (not lonely at the top since there are woman for you at the top for example) as a natural player who have had the proper one of the keys turned for a person to bring that great inner player inside almost all men which, depend only on how mensa you are.
This writing is an absolute gem. Everything I have experienced personally… I tried to abstain 8-9 days regularly. And I had (no kidding) a lot of indicators of interest from women. They do approach and talk to me, even though I do not approach them at all. About the end of the week, I sometimes feel like I can run 100 meters in 10 seconds, like a kung-fu fighther, a boxer or whatever… Too much tension sometimes brings loss of concentration. Beware though, if you already produce too much testosterone like me, younger than 30, when you abstain it peaks and some guys become hostile to you. No kidding. I am absolutely serious.
Forget about the church. It seems like you did not understand what is happening to me. Masturbating has created problems to my health. I started since i was 17 and today i am 40. The damage is really huge. And i regret why i learned from a friend this bad habit. It is not about the church but about my health. Some problems i face due to this very stupid habit:
a) chronic fatigue
b)headach
c)flou
d)cough
e)kidney problems
f)weak erection(caused twice to divorce with my partners)
g)Eyes problems
i) Memory problems and lack of concentration
q) infertility(when i was 17years i produced children with two of my gils friends but when i get maried at 28 could not .)
I talk to some doctors online who know the effects of masturbating. I have to spent regulary 50$ to buy herbal products to correct the problems i have created for years. But it can be possible only if i stop also masturbating ,a habit in which i have becam as addicted to. I know many other people who have the same problems like me .
kambe. Thanks
I love the part “you should have a loaded gun” that made me laugh so hard man, you have no idea! Good advice!!
McDonalds = Junk Food
Masturbation = Junk Sex
This is such a deep post on this topic.
Nobody really talks abou this and yet
it’s super important too.
I’ve jacked off every day since I was
10 or so.
I’ve been mulling this over for a while
now too. This gives me even more to
think about.
I agree that this is a topic worth exploring in relation to PUA. I have been experimenting with abstinence from orgasm and I have noticed personal benefits. Although I have experienced some of the nervousness mentioned after about a month, I have also noticed periods of clarity. It seems like a lot of guys trying this experiment experience this anxiety and it might have some explanations.
It could be the result of repression, which is never healthy. A possible solution would be to have another outlet like physical exercise, creative or mental endeavors, or close bonding with others. There is nothing new in this suggestion as many observers in past traditions point out this occurrence and the possible dangers of mismanaged sexual energy on the nervous system. However, it has also been the experience of other guys that have abstained to move through this discomfort.
I have been using this technique of abstaining from orgasm to help in my personal development and I have noticed an improvement in my emotional life. The dopamine cycle that accompanies orgasm is naturally addictive and thus states and input associated with it are particularly powerful. Having started to unravel this cycle, I have noticed that there is a difference in my mood depending on the circumstances surrounding the orgasm. The orgasm itself is associated with a dopamine spike, but over time and with frequent occurrence, there is more of a need to achieve the same dopamine rush. There is a building of tolerance. Naturally, the mind will grab dopamine spiking circumstances to compensate for the need for more dopamine. After years of doing this, a web of emotions, habits, and mental imagery can accompany orgasm and at this point, the orgasm is a different animal and depending on the severity, can cause hindrance on emotional health. When a person masturbates to porn, they are lighting up different pathways to achieve orgasm than they are while sleeping with a partner and the effects could be different. However, it is possible to masturbate without the dopamine-spiking rituals of mental fantasy (porn is a form of fantasy). This is considered healthy masturbation and is suggested by some psychologists involved in male empowerment. The idea of this technique is to free the mind of an internal compulsion that we have previously used to manage a deeper anxiety or unresolved issue. This anxiety that we experience while abstaining for over a month could possibly be the result of us actually coming into contact with this anxiety and we are not used to it, so it feels disturbing.
What does this have to do with PUA? Everything! As you know, its deep feelings of anxiety and shame that interfere with our success with women. Good PUA work is not mechanical techniques, but unraveling the outdated mental habits that prevent us from being our genuine attractive and relaxed selves.
Do the experiments for yourself and observe how you feel, that is the best way to tell.
My experience with practicing this has been more motivation for everything, more of a social life, better performance in school, better management of moods, I know Ive become more attractive to women because Ive been able to talk to them with greater ease. Ive broken out of my shell a lot more, Im more muscular than Ive ever been because Im motivated to change, and I carry myself a lot better. I was a worm about two years ago too. It feels like this has helped to put the fire under my ass and really get serious and clear about things.
My game is still a work in progress. I pick up PUA, have some limited success, and am driven back to do inner game because I encounter something uncomfortable that needs attention. The drive for reproduction is the most powerful force and motivator in organisms (even more than food), it can do a lot for us in our personal development if we learn to work with it and manage it well. I think our management of our own sexuality is a cornerstone in future lasting success with PUA, whether its for one night stands or eventual long term relationships.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brahmacharya
Excellent post bro !!!! Very informative !!
dude thanks im on 4 day of abstinence…
Where does sex come into this? Like what If I am abstaining from masturbation, and get laid on the 3rd or 4th day?
@Adam,
The point of the article was to abstain from masturbation so that you can have actual real sex. So, if you have sex after 3 or 4 days of abstinence then congratulations, you win!
If you are interested in increasing your testosterone levels-working out is a great way to go… Just hitting the gym a few times a week isn’t gonna turn you into a body builder but you will probably see a respectable increase in strength, stamina and energy levels. Also, if you are fat, that increases estrogene and lowers testosterone. So getting in shape and staying lean is the thing to do.
As far as masturbation, that is a really personal thing. If you are attempting “mastery over your cock” then that might be of some benefit… E.G.-I will not let the little head determine how I spend my time….looking at porn on the internet is a waste….etc.
However, another arguement can be made that rubbing one out can help one relax and get a better night’;s sleep, thus ensuring a more productive day.
Oh, and for premature ejaculators, rubbing one out before a date might be the best thing to ensure that things don’t end too quickly.
It’s not a one-size-fits-all for every guy.
i made myself a commitment.. if i have to ejaculate it means i dont have enough women and my routine is shit.
so i will not ejaculate and work on that…
hows that for motivation
I’ve never masturbated in my 18 years of life so this whole article did seem a little hard to relate to.
I ‘wet dream’ every few months or so I’d say, hard to tell but there aren’t many in a year. This has interested me greatly though, I’d love to help these findings in whatever way I can!
genial man
i completely agree with you.
Especially the trick reward opened my eyes.
i tell you – for me it s very hard to control it. pass 2 days it becomes a critical need. i presume it s just because i get bored and this is providing quick good feeling.
Now i m fighting against masturbation, putting out TV, VCR and PC from my home.
i want to lock my pc in my office not to have the possibility to take it after 2 days and do my stuff home..
It s amazing by the way how creative i can be after some days.
the drawback for me is that after 3/4 days i get on one hand strong desire but i don t want make effort to start with girls.
also more perverted sexuality come to my mind.
i get afraid and release all like a human bomb diffusing his load…
Well anyway i m happy to hear you and see that we re not alone..
THKS
Im currently trying the 7 day cycle as u stated in the article, im on my second week so far and have found to be more sociable, more motivated and surprisngly less eager to open up porn and jerk off, its like u break out off a destructive habit and u take control off your sex life. also found that after just coming back from leeds festival yesterday that despite not eating or drinking as well as i usually do water/ good food, I came back looking really good and feeling in a better place in life. Something about them 4 days seems to off made me actually stronger physically, maybe constant being on your feet dancing barging etc, and being out doors and not watching tele, pc screen etc seems to do wonders for general skin glow and a clear head. I drank plenty of alchohol whilst there and i feel drinking alcohol only seems to benifit me, note not to much all the time obviously bad 4 u, but the odd few cans here and there and odd night out getting smashed on double vodkas i tend to feel more manly if thats best to describe it. I also think that less masturbation doing the 7 day cycle will do the following:
Easier to put on weight, as it should slower your metabolism gradually, i always find after wanking regulary for 7 days i feel slim and weak.
easier to build strength at gym, and also feel stronger already only been 2 weeks, barely been gym, and randomly leeds festival seems to off made me more stocky :s
More energy
More motivated
Improved concentration levels, example just statrting to learn the guitar again been useless in past but tried today and actually made progress.
More confident, i tended to look at porn for long periods and jerk off once per day hence brain focused on porn and wanking all the time, seems make me less confident
more sociable
Mature in a better way
be better looking better skin glow, i reckon id be less hairy on cheast if hadnt masturbated so much up to now
overall i would recommend the 7 day as cycle as anything longer that i think it starts gradually been badder 4 u. Im gonna do the 7 day cyle for a few more weeks and hopefully know for certain if its doing anything.
Thanks=) I know that I have a problem and you have given me the courage to take a loaded gun to battle=) I shouldve known this all along
Cold showers in the morning help.. not only do they help to abtain from masterbating, but they also have a lot of benefits, like antiaging, no dried out skin as hot water does that, thicker hair. google benefits of cold shower.
I thought you were just talking bull
Then i really thought about my life. Since i had discovered masterbation, had i ever gone even 2-3 days at most. So i was able to 5 whole days
The first three days, a bit hornier, but little difference. Fourth day i became motivated, and like confident, and there was this strange manliness about me. Like i am not a huge guy, but it was different. I felt more terrotorial. I looked at every women sexually, and things that would get me anxious, i did things that scared me, and i was able to get throug. The 5th day was awesome! unfourtonately i couldnt sleep late 5th day, and got weak. I am starting again, i cant wait for the sixth and seventh day, if the 4th and 5th are any indications,
Something happens, like you unconciously become more attractive, your body language changes. You look at women lustfully and they respond to that! I guess i will find out what i would have been with more Testesterone. Your more motivated to go out and find sex. Ill blog about the sixth and seventh day, hopefully i will make it.
Thank you, i realize now that i keep eating rice at home, i will never find the stake
I also want to add this
I have thought about this, and come to the conclusion that masterbation is an unnatural act. Here is my logic.
When jerking off we are sending false signals to the rest of the brain and the body that we are the ones having sex and passing our seed on.
You will agree with me when i say that life has two purposes, Survive and procreate. The fact that we have evolved to the point where sex is such a big deal is unnatural. In the prehistoric times sex was routine. You had sex with your female equivalent. Parts of our brain, especially some parts are still in those times. So masterbation is a big lie to the brain. we are not procreating!
As to why the testerone levels decline in the days after, i thought about this too. In nature, maybe it means that if you didnt have sex for a week or two, then you had adopted a different role in life. Such as that of raising children, gatherer. Think about what people who abstain, especially in the army etc. for like a year. They lose all interest in it. I have read this many times. Soldiers report of having lost the urge to have sex.
In nature, true nature, if you didnt have sex for a week then that would be odd, since you have an erection every morning. Now nature didnt think that maybe you wouldnt want to impregnate a girl every time you had sex, but in nature all women would be pregnant year round. Thus one woman would produce one child every year.
The lives we live now have become a joke. For all these useless things, we have sacrificed the right to eat what we want, drink what we want, and have sex without having fear, shame, dates, all this garbage we have now.
Survive and procreate
Have we really evolved.
i am married since 20 years have kids as well. now i am 40. i consider myself very fit . but i am unable to get the habbit of masturbating now since i am typing this its been three days now. the reason is not very much enjoying sex with my spouse as she is very conservative .
and i am always feeling hot so i masturbate a lot and the problem i have face is prmature ejaculation. how to get rid of it and is it reall true that if u stop masturbating you really get women to get laid or how, need a good answer to my post .
Interesting post, i have masturbated only once a week for a few years now. To be honest it hasn’t made much of a difference in my life. What i have realized thought is that masturbation really is a HABIT it is not something that you HAVE TO DO.
Personally i have far better things to do than play with my dick.
Fact is, 2-4 ejaculations per week from sex or wanking heavily reduces the risk of prostate cancer.
Fact is, orgasms help you fall asleep quickly.
Solution = get 2-4 bangs per week, not masturbations. lol
“Cold showers in the morning help.. not only do they help to abtain from masterbating, but they also have a lot of benefits, like antiaging, no dried out skin as hot water does that, thicker hair. google benefits of cold shower.”
Good point.
Wow, I’ve always sort of had a suspicion that I may feel better after abstaining from masterbation for a while, but been skeptical about making any conclusions involving correlation of abstinence to the way I’ve felt during abstinence. After exerting quite a bit of effort to find some confirmation to my suspicions, google searches prompted very little but answers to ridiculous to seem worth my time.
First of all thank you for the article. The combination of cultural reference, surmises from personal experience, with a dash of science made it the most interesting read I’ve found so far, and after reading about the correlation of testosterone levels and abstinence, I’d like to share the experience that prompted me to once again search for this subject(which lead to me finding this article). I have an quite a bit of free time which I spend on the computer, and there are no less than two universities in my town. The combination of these two things makes it very rare for me to go for even a day without ejaculating.
It has been two days though, and similarly to how one can feel a sense of nostalgia triggered by a smell which forces them to recall some distant memory, I recently was taken aback by the realization that the way I felt during my recent abstinence reminded me so strongly of the feelings I had in middle school and early high school(in 22 now).
In your article, it seems a fantastic coincidence to my situation that you’ve included this correlation between testosterone levels and abstinence, because the day before my two day abstinence I began taking DHEA, a precursor to testosterone, as well as human growth hormones, epinephrine, and quite a few other neurotransmitters and hormones(And for those unfamiliar with biochemistry, ingestion of a precursor to a neurotransmitter or hormone generally results in an increase in the amount that exists in the body). On top of that coincidence, I had begun tanking tyrosine, a precursor to dopamine and epinephrine. I stopped taking the DHEA today, as frequent use of it at my age can be detrimental to liver and other biological functions. I will recreate the factors of my situation some time soon, and if the same result takes place, I think I will have actually found for myself a very significant modification to my routine, as far as making myself happy. I feel fucking amazing. If anyone has ever masterbated at a specific frequency to maximize chemical well being, please email me with the results you seem to find, especially if you’ve done so in conjunction with the use of DHEA.
Very interesting article.
High testosterone level is also beneficial in building muscle mass and burning fat, so sports in general.
Trying to “achieve” the one week mark will be an interesting observation exercise (or rather non-exercise).
Neuromonger,
You seem to have a better grasp of how all the hormones work along with the other biochemistry knowledge. Your experiments in using DHEA is pretty interesting and will be curious to see if you can replicate your results. May I ask what you’re majoring in? I presume it’s something having to do with biochemistry?
I’m glad to read that you enjoyed my input. I actually still have another semester left of basics, and my major will probably flop back and forth between many things(One of my parents teaches at the university, which grants me a large scholarship by default, so I can afford a lot of experimentation).
I will probably end up moving more towards information technology, though there are avenues to merge that with neurology. It’s actually possible to replace a hippocampus now with something that is kind of like a hard drive, for people who have conditions comparable to what is depicting in in the movie “Memento”, and there has actually been a toy released this year, which is the first attempt to use a brain to computer interface device to replace controllers for gaming. One company that makes these is emotiv systems, and hackers work pretty diligently to make open source versions of any software that they make, so I would deffinately say that information technology could lead into neurology by the time I would have a degree.
While I do have some credit hours dedicated to nutrition and pharmacy, most of my knowledge of biochemistry comes from reading about something called the “hedonistic imperative”, which is sort of the drug-related, more realistic side of Transhumanism(but I can all ready see I’m getting too off-topic to explain those things here), and having lived in a town with two universities, I’ve had my fair share of dabble in Psychonautics, which involved just as much reading as recreational drug use.
One thing that I’d like to conclude with(because I would feel a bit guilty if I didn’t), after realizing it should have been in my article, for anyone who caught interest in DHEA, internet searches about it will expose you to many readings about how amazing DHEA is for your health. Most of these sources neglect to mention that these health benefits are exclusively correlated to DHEA use in old people, because it causes their growth hormone to be at levels similar to what they had when they were young. If your all ready young, regular use of DHEA in high doses can have similar effects as steroids, including the possibility of causing liver failure.
I have been going the once a week route now for a few weeks and have noticed increased energy, drive and confidence. It definitely helps me creatively when playing my guitar and helps me socially when talking to people in general. I did try going 30 days the longest, but was pretty stressed out even though I did feel very sharp mentally. Too compensate you need to meditate and exercise to relieve stress for the days you don’t masturbate and I’ve been doing this and it has helped. I wonder though if it is possible to quit completely and rely on wet dreams though…
The interesting thing is, whenever I come back from the gym, even though I worked out a sweat and should be exhausted, I feel a strong sexual urge, but no surprise considering how the testosterone has built up. Usually I like to work-out before I head-out.
I once went on a trip out east with a bunch of friends, one of them being a girl I really liked but she had absolutely no interest in me. Since we were so busy traveling and sightseeing, I had no time to masturbate for the entire week . Low and behold, throughout the week her and I grew closer and closer, to the point of almost spending the night together on the final night (day 7). However, one of the other women became jealous and kept purposely (and literally) getting in the way, so it never happened. There was a fair mix of guys and girls on the trip (10 all together), and I’m sure the other guys probably continued to masturbate regularly. So it is in my opinion that it helped make me the alpha. It was an odd experience, I honestly think it had much to do with the spike in testosterone by day 6 and 7 (I definitely felt different). But the time we returned, and regular sex (and masturbation) continued in normal life with my actual girlfriend (who I was having problems with at the time, because I liked the other girl), that really deep connection I felt with her (and from the jealous girl) has totally seized.
I think masturbation is a good think when you’re not depending only on it. It releases the stress and whatever problems you might thing you have – they are all in your head.
Due to over masturbation. Once a day for 10 years, I was left with soft erections and had a very hard time getting it up with the hottest of woman.
Western medicine did not have a solution except for take more of these pills or those pills and see if it works.
Eastern medicine which has developed over thousands of years looks at a holistic approach. I eventually came across some forum boards about sexual exhaustion.
Its true. Sexual exhaustion (The lack of essential male essence. Dopamine, Testosterone and etc) will occur in your life if you masturbate too much for too long. Once a week is probably fine, but every day is over kill.
After 10 days you will level out and your urge to find the woman of your dreams starts happening. You will start to feel confident, cool, calm and collected.
I have been with some very beautiful woman all due to my abstinence and only jerking it every so ooften. Its not only because I am horny and they realize it. It is because I have more overall energy, spiritually, mentally and physically.
Its hard abstaining from sexual thoughts when you live in a world where sex is marketed at all times. One of the biggest problems in the western world is the lack of meditation or clearing of the mind. We live for decades thinking, thinking and thinking. Primarily selfish thoughts. The moment we learn to protect our essence is the moment we find a peace of mind.
Thats my own personal opinion, most will disagree. Ask your self, why is it that our American culture has so many prostate and erection issues? Why don’t we see these issues in third world countries were men are more focused on surviving and not thinking about sex or masturbating often.
If you can go 7 days without blowing a load and then have sex, and NOT finish in less than 5 minutes I am jealous.
There is definitely a negative correlation between the number of days I go without and my endurance in bed, which forces me to “clean the pipes” before I might get some.
Please DON’T say that masturbation is healthy, this is all crap, take it form a 9 years addict to masturbation it’s terrible, it destroys you, you disrespect your self and you’ll end up a lonely bastard watching porn and having no relationships at all.
Sorry for the long comment, but I stumbled on this website and had to chime in on the discussion.
I’ve definitely noticed serious shifts, in both directions, with changes in my masturbation cycle.
Until about two years ago, I used to have complete dominion over my ejaculation. I could bang a girl for as long as I needed/wanted to and could basically cum on command. I could literally bang a girl for forty minutes or 90 seconds, hard-fucking or sweet-love–up to me. I had a couple of girls credibly give me the “best ever” prize. I masturbated once in a great while, since I had a steady rotation of prospects to service the engine or a girlfriend that I could call over to fuck when needed.
Then a strange thing happened. I got a “serious” girlfriend and made the mistake of moving in with her. The problem is that this girl had a low drive and didn’t enjoy actual intercourse as much as previous chicks. Sometimes, after fucking her for 5 or 6 minutes, she’d basically ask me to wrap it up. A lot of the time she wasn’t even interested. I started having LESS actual sex and jerking it to porn a lot more. A lot. To make matters worse, our sex wasn’t that good, so I’d find myself jerking it right AFTER having sex with her.
That wreaked habit on my control. I started cumming in a minute or two, even when I didn’t want to. Then, when she started to actually enjoy fuckin’, I couldn’t last long enough. She basically created the problem, but now it was MY problem. I tried the kegel bullshit and trying to jerk it off slowly, but none of that worked.
So I decided to go cold turkey. No mo’ masturbation. I figured that if I couldn’t get laid at home, the drive would get me laid elsewhere. So far (and it’s been a month), I’m finding a lot of the same results guys have reported, with some twists:
1. Overall feeling:
I’m aiming for the seven-day cycle, but I find there’s a consistent arc, depending on the day. Day 1 is whatever. Days 2, 3, 4 are the best. I feel manly, strong, and motivated to exercise. Great concentration. Smooth in my approaches. Days 5 and 6 start getting difficult. I spend more time distracted by sex and plotting my moves. My glaring at chicks starts getting creepy and TOO lustful. But this may change with more practice.
2. Approaches:
I never had a problem with approaches, but I found myself getting too cutesy and “clownish”–focused on entertaining, rather than on an actual goal. Now I exude a masculine sexuality when I transact with girls, with the same amount of charm, and they respond differently. I went to a social dance last week (on Day 3) and I was fondling and touching and laughing with a group of three girls. I had the energy and drive to keep all those balls in the air. My target was all over me, despite learning later on that she had a boyfriend at home.
3. Lasting power:
This is a work in progress, but with some measurable results. I’m finding that if I get some action on days 3 or 4, I can already control things a lot more and last longer. By days 5 and 6, I’m so pent-up that I still cum rather quickly, but find that I recover a lot faster than before. Whereas before I needed a whole day to “reload,” I could go again in an hour.
Anyone have any thoughts on the lasting-power aspects of the 7-day cycle and these other issues?
So, I’m getting my life together. Been going to the gym. Bout to go out more and more. I used to do it many times a day some where around 5 times on a good day.
I’m on day 2 and this is torture! I think I might have been someone who used it as a stress and anxiety reducer but damn I’m sorta going out of my mind knowing that its gonna be quite sometime before I can do it.
I suppose thats the whole point right? To increase the drive to actually find women?
How can I get through this? and is it really worth it?
Great site btw.
I’ve tried to figure this out for some time, and I’m thankful you put this thoughtful post here. Actually sometimes watching some good porn gets me all horny and motivated to go out. Especially when I had a busy week at work and no time for social interactions. But I think it is as with the rest of pickup skills training – the field is better than being alone at home!
Prelude: Around New Years day I decided instead of making a bunch of resolutions which would eventually be broken and forgot about I would focus on one idea and experiment that I felt would be both a mental and spiritual challenge. I would remain abstinent for 40 days. Along this ambitious journey I will document and explain any mental and physical transformations that occur during this time. The inspirational voice behind this act has been my own. I feel that my extreme and overwhelming attraction to women in the physical has grown to impair both my creative energy and interactions with many women in general. My goal is not to rid my sex drive or amount of physical attraction to women but instead to channel that energy into music and physical health and well being. I have decided to use this same energy and direct it towards my creative process and developing a clearer mind and healthier body. Because I stay active with stretching, Pilates and weight training to begin with the biggest challenge obviously will be to remain abstinent. In order to assure this experiment is not interrupted I have deleted the numbers of females that I was active with or could potentially be active with. Yarch to the masses…
Day 1- Feeling fine. Nothing was truly difficult today at all worked on some music and excited for the album to come out!
Day 2- Woke up pretty pissed off…not sexual frustration but mainly because I realize I can’t turn back now. Went to the gym and worked on music as usual did 1 hour of gyro tonics and meditation.
Day 3- Felt very strong in the gym however after my workout i felt slightly dull. I am extremely hydrated and have been eating well but I feel a bit groggy. Could be from anything though..
Day 4- Had very intense dreams sleeping last night. One dream was being on stage with baba and soundcheck taking long..this delayed our show an hour and the crowd was restless and I jumped in and crowd surfed. The whole audience was excited..and as i was pushed back on stage I saw the face of a girl (i will not name) that i met at a RISD party weeks before( and yes would like to have sex with this girl). Woke up went about my business worked on music was kind of stumped but ended up getting it together and making a very good altered version of a song. Sent it to the label they loved it.
Day 5- Woke up extremely aggressive but relieved for being able to control myself for day five. Went to the gym felt surprisingly weak but fought through it. Came home helped around the house worked on music, then filmed the u-stream webisode with TED. Came home and went to bed.
Day 6- No morning wood lol…that’s about all i can say for this day
Day 7- Borderline Numb…basically my sex drive is all mental but thinking about certain women doesn’t necessarily make me physically tempted to engage in sex and i refuse to resort to pornography or whacking it.
Day 8- Woke up feeling proud of myself for making 8 days. Went to the gym had an amazing workout. Excited to go to work on a visual for a song off the album. Got some reviews back from blow up magazine italy. Was crazy to see an article written in Italian about my group. What set me off though was some bad press by Resident Advisor. For whatever reason while reading the article I became extremely irate. Usually this is not in my nature but I felt abnormally aggressive for about fifteen minutes. I then laughed it off and realized i may be going through some sort of hormonal changes. I’m not a scientist but I definitely feel different lol.
Day 9- Felt Amazing all day. High energy and feelings of ambition.
Day 10- Travelled to work on the music video. Day went great felt amazing and even more energetic from being around good people.
Day 11- Shot the video all day. Excited to have the crew work so well together and very happy with the footage we got. After shot the scene and hung out I was very excited to possibly party and see some women. One woman in particular did not show up and for some reason i was slightly bothered by it. Out of nowhere i started feeling extreme feelings of curiosity and attraction towards this particular girl and she wasn’t even there.LOl my minds playing tricks on me and im not even drunk…Then I realize that it’s day 11 and i think my testosterone is significantly high today
Day 12- Got back to nyc to kick it with the A&R then went home to nj. I picked up food for my family and was not given the proper amount of money. I put the bill on my credit card and came home and realized i could have paid half with cash and half on my card. My mother told my sisters what i did and i grew extremely irate. I never usually let things like that upset me. For 20 minutes i felt very upset and depressed. I then laughed at myself and then worked on some music and felt calm. I can honestly say that changes have been felt and it has been 12 days. I am very conscious of placebo but i definitely feel like the past three days have had the biggest impact on my emotions.
Day 13- Ran some errands in NYC …went to soho and as I like to put it the SWAN capital of the world..i will explain SWAN later…I literally found something attractive about every single woman i walked past.. I was able to hold eye contact and smile at any woman but then I felt creepy and chilled out. Things seemed more vivid to me..the skin tone, clarity, bone structure and pheromones of every woman were pulsating all around me. I wouldn’t say I feel straight up horny but instead i feel spiritually inclined with the presence of women as creatures that put life into the world. It was one of the most amazing and bizarre days since boarding the ship.YARCH!
Day 14- I am literally convinced I can give any woman the best sex of her life at this point. It’s been two weeks I feel pure and more in charge of my self and my actions. I truly feel like a full being and have been inspired greatly to write songs for the next album.
Day 15- Writing a bunch of new songs. I feel great I think that the biggest challenge was the first ten days. I now feel balanced no feelings of anxiety or depression and extremely creative. Although I have been working on music every day post the first day of abstaining i have felt a spike in creativity after the first week. I don’t think it is placebo because crazy ideas have came to me and i’ve not been stumped at all. The nicolas Jaar album has inspired me to go even more left. I think the feelings of loneliness have gone away after the first seven to ten days..I now feel more comfortable in this state then reverting back. I think the main reason im not tweaking and eager to go meet new women other than this snow storm is that im in a creative zone musically. We will see if this remains, but it feels good so far. Yarch on!
hi,
i know this post is kind of old now, but i couldn’t google-out an answer to my question:
if my body is used and has formed with low testosterone levels (many years of playing with my pal…) , so will this once_a_week T level get me to my ACTUAL, genetically determined, physical appearance? I mean all the secondary sexual dimorphism features.
Cuz as a mid-twenties guy i’d really like to look more masculine… Or even have bigger “package”, and for god’s sake- a non-patchy growing beard!! =]
Can’t wait for replies!
@Pappy Mason,
Wow, great recap of your abstinence experiment! If only more guys would simply give it shot like you and see the results for themselves rather than going into endless speculation and denial.
@another_follower,
I’m not exactly sure what your saying, but it seems like you are implying that while in your mid twenties you don’t believe that you have fully developed your genetically pre-determined masculine features because of excessive masturbation? If that is what you are implying, then I think you might be stretching, considering that between puberty and the height of your development at around 18-19 years old, your body is constantly producing Testosterone and replenishing as to get your body to it’s desired developed state even if you are masturbating a lot. In fact, if there was ever a time in a guys life where my 7 day hypothesis doesn’t apply it’s during the late teens to early twenties, simply because the replenishment cycle of testosterone is much quicker than someone older. So, in my opinion, you’ve probably already peaked in terms of growth development, however that doesn’t mean that abstaining won’t help you, it does still increase masculine traits but in a more subtle way such as deeper voice, more release of attractive pheromones, confidence, motivation and general well-being.
Hopefully that made sense. If not, stay tuned, as I’ll be delving deeper into my own personal research on this topic.
ahh darn it =] well at least i get more aggressive and get into mindset “sex sex sex sex other_stuff sex sex sex sex…” =]
can’t wait for that new topic You mentioned, hopefully i won’t miss it.
this whole blog is awesome, Matt!
Hey guys, I’m 20 years old, have been masturbating since I was 11 pretty much every day so I think I’ve also been addicted for the past 9 years and I suspect this could be a contribution to my low levels of motivation, energy, confidence, etc.
However I do want to try this theory because I’ve also had suspicions that it may work.
But that’s the thing, if I’ve been addicted to masturbation, am I doomed for the rest of my life or can this experiment really restore my testosterone levels and my penis back to good form?
Thanks!
Well guys I’ve tried this and all I can say is that it’s changed my life!
All of a sudden I’m a babe magnet, the girls all pay me way more attention than they ever did before (I have two dates in a week with girls at work), my energy levels have gone through the roof, I can concentrate more on the goals in my life / including work…… wow just wow… sure it was hard for the first few days…
Limit the masturabtion to maybe just once a week like stated, and if you do need to relieve yourself don’t masturbate to porn or you may slip back into the cycle.
I’m on my 8th day no and still going strong… not sure if I should even masturbate now or wait longer??
DUMP the porn boys!!
Masturbation is very dangerous. I have experience of 25 years. The science has never found the danger of this vice but with experience i came to notice that really masturbating is dangerous to the body. Some people will tell you that it is just a myth . yOU COME TO REALISE the danger after mmany years after the body has become sick and very weak.some symptoms due to masturbation:
dry month
1)blurry vision and a lof pain on eyes.
2)CHRONIC FATIGUES up to the extend of failing take your shower using your hand.you have the feeling that your own hands are very havy for you.
3) Constipation. You do not have good digestion.
4) Very weak erection and your sperm can be leaking.
5)Chronic headack
6) Very low immune system like in a HIV+ person.
7)Feeeling of burning even when it is very cold
9) thining of the hair and hair loss
10) groomed faceand less attraction to women…
When you stop masturbating for several weeks some of the symptoms disappear.
Kambe
@Kambe,
I think you went a little overboard here and don’t believe masturbation will cause that amount of side effects you are claiming. Granted, I do believe that excessive masturbation causes decreases in certain male hormones and can have effects on libido and mental state, but you go to far with your claims with little evidence to back them up, whether anecdotal or otherwise.
Here’s a link to to a lengthy list of people’s experiences quitting porn and masturbation for as much as several months. It’s quite a compelling read.
http://www.reuniting.info/download/pdf/0.BENEFITS.pdf
Symptoms i described last time will be experienced only when:
1) you have over masturbated
2) you have overmasturbated for longtime.
In the beginning when one starts masturbating it seems to be good as i also thought .
Some doctors and cultures(westerners especially) encouge this bad practice. But with time you come to realise that the body has been used in a irreparable manner because of so called experts who claim that masturbating is good.
After you have over masturbated for a long period you will notice two major health problems which i describe as first symtoms:
1) Excessive fatigue.
2) Very weack erection
N.B: What do i describe as over masturbation? Do you know that some people can masturbate up to more than 15 time in a single day? personnaly i went throught this experience and some of my collegues .In this case you feel like the kidneys are going to burst and with time the brain will be affected(difficulty of cocentration) and many more health complication.
The effect of over masturbation will not only affect your health but also your social life will suffer with time.
Some of you said that i did not support this with evidence.
You should know that i came to this conclusion after i have personnaly experienced it for years and after many other youth have complained of similar symptoms. But i did also research for many yearsin this field.
Kambe
I am 14 years old almost 15 i looked this up because i finally realized masterbaiting was not the answer. I have masterbaited since i was 11 everyday till i realized it was not okay anymore(no joke 4 years masterbaiting everyday, only one time per day) and ever since i quit i have noticed major changes in my attitude towards women. I can aproach them way better and I litterly know everything to say to them but i only did it for a week… Then i couldnt handle it and busted a load. I made it around 6 days longest i have ever done in 4 years. But on Monday (2 days after i busted) i noticed i was not as good at talking to women. But by the middle of the week i was back on top of my game.. In conclusion i think that the 7 day cycle is possibly the way to go!
Yes you have to watch that, I waited 8 days before busting and then I hit the floor then next day.. I was all over the place emotionally. So when you bust you want it to be on a quiet day, so bust Sat night and then recover sunday maybe…
Great Article!
One of the things I noticed was that I had more energy for working out and I was more productive (overall) if I delayed from doing it. If I proceeded to do it daily, it made me lethargic all week.
I’m actually going to put this to the test and go with the seven day method!
I like watching my boyfriend jerking off but you are right if I want a really good hard fuck I like him to stop wanking for a few days so that when I see him a the weekends he has a massive hardon the minute we touch his erections are much harder and he can go at it for much longer before he does ejaculate he cums harder and faster and his cum is much more potent and seems thicker and more mobile and I enjoy sex much more with him and love the idea that he has saved his cum for me for the whole week to give me and deep hard fuck and lots of hot creamy spunk.
Firstly I’m gonna thank you for such a brilliant article. Indeed it helped me because I abstained from masturbation for like 4-5 days and i must admit, it feels great. Before i was like an uncontrollable psycho and there was this intense urge of relieving myself and this interfered in my personal life. But now this is no longer the case and talking to girls is much more easier. Such articles should be reinforced by giving steps and advice. Again thanks a lot!!
I started masturbating 10 years back when I was 15 (with varying frequencies , from every day to once a week etc), and dint think much about it til now when I felt that it was holding me back from getting it on with women .. things were different when I was young and would constantly approach girls and got a lot of action besides masturbation, but feel now my sex drive has reduced and wanking off takes care of my sexual needs, hence the reduced urge to go and flirt with women .. so I decided to stop masturbating for a while and see what happens, its been 9 days now and i dont have any urge to do it whatsover ..
These are my observations :
First few days, I felt like I have more energy and time to do things .. but what was dramatic was the change in reaction of women around me .. i used to get stares before as well, but it has increased (some sort of hidden force i guess) .. i talk to a lot more random women now, and they seem overtly giggly and suggestive .. I am more aggressive in talking to them, and they seem to like it ..
However, there is a downfall to this .. during a presentation that I had to give (on the 8 th day of abstaining) , i was over excited and could not control my voice (usually quite confident with these sort of things) I was really aggressive in defending my ideas when someone asked questions .. I guess it has to do with all the hormones that are stored up due to abstinence.. maybe next time i wil wank off before such a thing, but otherwise it feels great socially .. kind of reminds me of my childhood days when i wanted to make more and more friends .. and women they seem so much more beautiful now , and I want them more and more
its like women just know you are saving up your ‘love’ for someone like them
fuck porn .. that shit kills your soul !
This is so true. I always thought it, good to see facts backing it up. My rule is that if you have to do it, do it before you get 7+ hours of solid sleep.
It’s been like 4 days since I’ve been abstaining and I feel much more confident, masculine and invigorated.
abstaining from masturbation of course, I feel like fucking every woman I’m attracted to right there on the spot. lol
Hey Matt,
Does having sex everyday have the same negative effects? Or are there positive effects that outweigh the negatives.
Mike
According to the experiences masturbating and doing sex regulary are not the same. Masturbating is more damaging than doing real sex with a partner of the opposite sex.
People say that mastabating is good and natural and those who oppose it’s benefits are not informed or do not know any thing about it.
The truth is that mastabating is very dangerous. When you masterbate you are killing your own body. The body(the brain) will realise that you have cheated. And consequenses are really unbearable. And this do not happen in a single day. It take time before you notice that you have killed your body by overmastubating.
Overmastubating will affect your life in all aspects of life( It will affect your health, social life..)
kamb
Wow. Ok first things first. About 10 years ago for the first time ever after about 12 years of jerking of, I decided to try and stop. I just felt it might be a good thing to do at the time because I was cleaning up areas of my life and thought I’ll confront this problem also. Anyway I managed 2 weeks and one thing I noticed is when I did get an erection, it was much bigger than normal. Lasted 2 weeks, then one night I had the window open in my flat and I heard the couple next door having sex. I was pissed of because this was torture. But had to give in and rubbed one out. Can’t remember much of how I felt for that 2 weeks now except for the irony of that incident. Seemed like a test from god. I’ve only ever heard someone having sex 3 tines in the many years I’ve been living there. Anyway back to present day. I decided to try again. Funny because I had alot of ideas that it would help in areas like you’ve all mentioned. Only on day 2 now but thought I’d google it and found this site. I’m so glad to gave alot of ideas confirmed. Had a realisation reading the last comment. I wonder if it’s natures way of keeping you with the girl your with. So that other women won’t be as interested. Want to write more but I
at work typing on my iPhone. I’ll keep you updated. Only day two. But as I’m a bit of a loner I’m very interested to see what happens.
I was referring to mikes post. Second last one btw
- Check out what ayurveda, taoism says about the topic.
ie., preserving and converting it (see multi-orgasmic man)
- 100 drops of blood go to make 1 drop of semen
- One can masturbate & not come. Difficult but doable through practice.
Dear clinton
am very happy that you have really brought all what i was
advising on masturbation. Masturbation has a very bad side effects and serious consequenses .However you suggested that one should seek help from homeotherapeth.You did not provide some of their adress in order to find them.
Kambe
I found that if I’m abstaining from masturbation I’ve got more energy, my voice is deeper, I’m more confident and sooo horny. Now, after 5 days non masturbating, I had very erotic dreams, and usual I don’t have them at all.
My energy levels are higher, to the point I have problem with falling asleep. But it’s only about week of such high, then it’s going to be normal.
Regarding sexual energy, build up, relaxation, etc, you might be interested in this;
http://www.reuniting.info/wisdom/is_sex_a_private_matter
Just an excerpt, Over 2000 years ago, Daoist Master Laozi is said to have advised that a person’s approach to sex is a sign of his level of spiritual evolution.1 For those who aspire to the higher realms of living, there is “angelic dual cultivation,” which allows every portion of the body, mind and spirit to meet its yearning for the integration of yin and yang.
Modern neuroscience is beginning to confirm Laozi’s claim that ordinary sex (with orgasm) disorders the subtle energies. Deep in a primitive part of the brain known as “the reward circuitry,” orgasm equates with a mighty surge of a neurochemical called dopamine. It’s the “I’ve got to have it” neurochemical that urges us to do things that furthered our ancestors’ material plane survival, and above all, pass on genes.
It makes us feel like Superman or Wonder Woman when it surges. Indeed a Dutch scientist reported that brain scans of people having orgasm resemble those of people shooting heroin.2
However, just like a drug high, it does not lead to lasting feelings of satisfaction. Dopamine drops immediately after orgasm, and other neurochemical shifts adversely affect dopamine levels for days.3
In some lovers this shift accounts for the “roll over and snore” phenomenon, often followed by days of emotional detachment. However, the neurochemical changes may show up as neediness, irritability, mood swings, feelings of scarcity and defensiveness, harsh judgments, hyper-activity, a “need for space,” cravings for (addictive) substances (or more orgasms) that temporarily raise dopamine in the reward circuitry, etc.
….
More here;
http://www.reuniting.info/wisdom/is_sex_a_private_matter
Maaaan, I always felt that something was wrong with me since I started masturbating heavily about 6,7 years ago. Although I had two girlfriend for the past full 5 years I still retained the habit, I felt lazy all the time. However, I rember a 6 month period in which I had a fight with my girlfriend so we separated, and in that 6 months I didnt masturbate that much….wow now that made me energetic more sociable and more productive….. funny how it all comes together if you think about it…
I’m starting the 7 day cycle abouuuuut: NOW!
I didn’t read all the comments, i will get around to that, but are there any other studies about when you peak? I know from experience (training 4-7 hrs a day before state in high school) where i had abstained from masturbation for a whole season 4-6+ months and i peaked for like 3 days with roid rage.. im very even tempered but i never experienced anything like this. I was literally GOD for like 3 or 4 days.
Unfortunately it went away 2 days before state. What i mean by roid rage is 1) I was literally invincible. I could feel like power radiating around my body like an invisible shield and was capable of killing anything with my bare hands and 2) I had a terrible temper for like 2 days. I snapped at people for taking too long and little annoyances. Eventually I apologized but I was excessively aggressive and mean for a few days.
Has anybody heard of this? It seems to be the same as the Raging Bull theory where you peak in aggressiveness however this was a 4-6ish month abstinence so i have no idea how to time it.
It may not take that 4-6 months, I only started training more than 5 hrs a day for about a month before state so it may be possible to hit this peak for a 2-4 day window after abstaining for 1 month and training 6+ hrs a day
It’s hard ( no pun intended) for me to abstain from jacking off. I have figured out that I can man up and deal with my horny feelings or wimp out and jack off. People notice when I’m not masturbating. I take that extra effort to look attractive to girls. I of course don’t tell others of what I am doing but it makes me feel good to be in control of my desires. The seven day rule workss!
Hello matt, there is a question i’d like to ask. As im at the 6th day of abstaining ,i start feeling more confident on approaching women, but I think I’m coming across a problem. If I actually manage to get laid, wont I have a premature ejaculation because I didnt masturbate for that long?
Is it okay to masturbate but not go to climax? ie no fluid coming out? Do you still think you’d get the same effects as giving up masturbation completely? Would it be better or worse? What about other factors like time? I mean there would have to be a difference between masturbating for 2 minutes and not cumming compared to 30 minutes and not cumming?
Also, there seems to be some worry about not orgasming over a long period of time. Is there any worries about this? I’m kind of guessing a wet dream would take care of this if one was going without sex and masturbation. That reminds me does anybody notice any energy/spirit effects after having a wet dream? I can’t remember my energy levels after having one when I was younger.
Finally, it seems like common sense that biology would prefer us procreating rather than masterbating. However, I’m kind of curious if anybody can think up of any biological reasons why man or woman would masturbate.
Thanks for any replies.
@jon bon van dame,
I think your 4-6 months of abstinence was probably a bit much, especially combined with your training, which also boosts testosterone levels. With all that testosterone flowing through your body, I’m not surprised at how aggressive you became. This is why I believe that we have a natural cycle that tries to correct our hormonal balances, one of which is through ejaculation/masturbation and why a usually only abstain for not more than 7-14 days.
@panagiotis,
Yes, it’s quite probable that you will ejaculate sooner during sex, but I wouldn’t let that be an issue as you should hopefully be able to bounce back for round 2 with minutes and last much longer. In addition, as you have more and more sex (hopefully) then you will get better at controlling the timing of your ejaculation. If you’re pre-mature, just shrug it off and tell her that was a practice round and the next one will blow her mind
@JP,
Well the point of this whole thing is the connection between the actual ejaculation and release of dopamine as a reward system. Therefore, if you masturbated but didn’t ejaculate, then you’re not depleting those hormones. So, in theory your idea could work, but I highly doubt most men could masturbate on a regular basis without the urge to finish to completion, so I really don’t think this is viable strategy.
I do think that we do need to orgasm on a particular cycle which I infer could be anywhere between 7-14 days depending on your age, diet, physical fitness, etc. As you say, eventually, our bodies will take care of this through wet dreams if it has to.
Awesome article, and awesome advice.
For the badly addicted, who are reading this article in hopes to quit – KNOW that this information will change your life – IF you are DETERMINED to follow it completely.
you won’t need to read “how to be attractive to women” articles anymore… It will come naturally. just as you will… haha
It is known that confidence is important in attracting women. Doing my reading on the matter, I have read people say that they found women were more attracted to them when they’re not masturbating. Like they can sense it.
Now of course, if you’re feeling better, more energetic, more manaly and confident you’re going to get more women interested in you but I’m wondering if a woman can subconciously/biologically tell if a guy is not masturbating and hence be more attracted to them. Kind of smilar to phermones thinking. It makes sense to me that a woman would want to be with a guy more who doesn’t masturbate compared to one that does all other things being equal and nature probably has a way of telling them that.
Anon, I like how you seem pretty certain on this matter. Would you care to share your knowledge? Thanks.
Women naturally have the tendancy of avoiding guys who overmasturbate. There is something natural in women which just take women away from you if you are overmasturbating.
Masturbation is very bad. its spoil your life.
Kambere
I came across this detailing people’s experiences abstaining. Check it out. http://www.reuniting.info/download/pdf/0.BENEFITS.pdf
This is an article that pretty much validates something I felt like I’ve known along. Long time ago a friend of mine was worked up about talking to a girl he likes and planned to masturbate the day before going up to her. I instinctively said “don’t or you might lose your sex drive. Then you won’t be able to talk to her as effectively.”
It was a response that came out of nowhere and this article reminds me of that spontaneous wisdom I shared with him.
In my personal experience, I do notice how introverted I become for the next few days after I freshly fap. I wasn’t always shameful about it until it became an excessive habit, and I think it is only THEN when it affects your life. After fapping, I would require 2-4 days to recover while being stuck in an apathetic rut.
I almost went a month without masturbating one time and I found myself being more willing to engage in social situations. I even became comfortable talking to my family for long bursts of time without trying to find things to occupy myself with in between silences. Silence just felt natural. I also tend to slow down my speech the less I fap, I feel a lot less anxious to get from one moment to the next.
I’ve recently rebooted and I think I’m on my 10th day of abstinence. I hope to completely quit from this point on and see if I can regain the clarity that’s been missing the past few years.
Though I gotta ask…would abstinence help me regain lost size or at least help maintain stiffness? Also, does abstinence have anything to do with your endurance and how long you can go? Because overfapping over stimulizes your nerves and so gets used to earlier and earlier releases.
Scientists and westerners praise the habit of masturbating. They claim that its healthy and normal.
In the beginning masturbating looks good. But with time you will realize that you have spoiled your body and you will regret it.
it will affect negatively your life in all aspects;
a) Social life:
-You will avoid people including your family members.
-You will avoid to talk to the opposite sex
-You will be alone without friends
b) Memory problems
-You will have difficulty to concentrate intellectually and slow to learn
-Serious Loss of memory
C) In marriage
-You will not satisfy sexually your partner since you will not have a strong erection(Risk of divorce)
-Impotence
d) Health
Masturbation has a serious health implication:
-Blurry vision
-weak immune system( i suspect that it can even make some one to test HIV+) am still researching on this.
-Rushes…
-Y
How and why does masturbation effect memory? I’m not disagreeing as from what I read I think I heard that before but I don’t understand why there is a connection. Why would masturbation effect memory? What’s the reasoning behind the body doing that? That’s something that’s hard for me to personally tell since I had memory problems both before and after masturbation.
So I had quit masturbation for a couple of weeks? there. Well, I did masturbate some but made sure not to go to orgasm till one night I accidently went too far. It seemed to take me a little longer to get the effects than others did but yes there was more energy and more achievment power inside the body. Sex drive was stronger and I felt/knew like I would cum sooner and there were more than a few times where all I could think about was women.
I actually never masturbated till I was 18 or over, than masturbated too much for years and years afterwards. Part of me would always search for info because I was wondering if it truly effect my energy levels (I love to exercise) +I had a bad feeling and some logical thoughts that it might be bad for you but I could never find info that it was actually bad for you. I mean if you look around for info on masturbation and lazy you will find most people saying BS to that with the possible exception of extreme masturbation. There is a funny animation PSA series on youtube or there was I can’t find it anymore where it warns about how you’ll get lazy, won’t be interested in females etc if you masturbate and almost all comments are on the video being way off. Thanfully, I heard from a few knowlegeable people while researching that this stuff can hurt you. So it’s good to find some information on this that validated my thoughts. I’m now on another non masturbation journey.
Why does it effect memory though?
How overmasturbation affect the brain:
As i always say. Masturbating is bad.very bad.consequenses are unbearable with time:
Frequent masturbation and ejaculation will stimulate the acetylcholine/parasympathetic nervous functions. Excessive masturbation and ejaculation can, and often times will, result in over-production of sex hormones and neurotransmitters such as acetylcholine, dopamine and serotonin. An unnatural abundance of these hormones and neurotransmitters can cause the brain and adrenal glands to perform excessive dopamine-norepinephrine-epinephrine conversion, in turn, making the brain and bodily functions perform at an extreme level. In other words, there is a huge change in body chemistry when one masturbates excessively. This leads into
Premature Ejaculation
and other frustrating sexual side effects.
While the normal physical “It takes at least 12
to 14 minutes for women to climax”
response for a man is to reach climax and ejaculate approximately 2 to 3 minutes after penetrating the vagina, the normal physical response for a woman is to build to a climax (orgasm) about 12 to 14 minutes after coitus (intercourse, sex) occurs. Some premature ejaculation cases are easy to diagnose, especially when the man ejaculates before he even enters a woman. In relationship terms, premature ejaculation can be diagnosed as ejaculating before the woman has an opportunity to orgasm. This is what over-masturbation can lead to – a disappointed woman and an unconfident man. but the man can also suffer from impotency,weak erection, chronic fatigue,blurry vision,weak immunity like that of HIV+ people,month dryness,…and many other serious side effects.
kambe
Ok, being shy around women I do not know if I have PE or not but it was always a concern of mine. Now one hears about how PE in a good percentage of men but I have always wondered what is the true amount of time a man should last with a woman? If someone’s body is in good shape all around, how long would they last on average? Is it supposed to be a shorter time as a way of nature making sure you impregnant and reproduce quickly? Or is it supposed to be hopefully longer because like as you mentioned in your post it takes longer for the woman to a climax. So shouldn’t we as guys be able to last approximately that long in order to satisfy our lady more? Looking at it from a biological standpoint, it would keep her more attracted to you which in turn would mean more chance for preganancy because hey it can take more than one time to get pregannt:) I wonder what the true amount of time a guy should last with women.
It’s interesting you mentioned PE because I was just recently reading that mercury when present in the system gives you PE. I’m also thinking back to a time I was taking something and if that helped me with staying power. I have ordered a herbal product and am curious to see the results of it.
So yeah, Kambe what do you say is the proper amount of time a guy should last with his lady? Also, what do yo think of the health effects of smaller amounts of masturbation? Thanks for your time.
I’ve heard a lot of things about the good effects of not masturbating for several weeks, but I’ve never gone more than a week without doing it. One thing I’ve heard is that your neuro-chemical state changes your pheromones and makes you more attractive like that.
I’m currently trying to go for 30 days. I’ll be able to do that because whenever I have the urge to masturbate, I watch videos of surgery and abscess drainage on Youtube instead. I’m currently on the third day.
I’ll report my findings when I’ve done that. In the mean time, I’ve found these things in the past:
Before an orgasm, without deodorant, I smell alright except for light musk. Right after an orgasm I smell fucking rancid.
The day after an orgasm, I’m far more likely to go into a “oh god everyone hates me and is only pretending to like me” state the next day. I’m also much less motivated to do something like working out.
Day two after an orgasm, those two things are much less likely.
Day three after an orgasm is basically more motivation and being more emotionally positive instead of emotionless or depressed. This increases in the following days.
Well, I masturbated yesterday from lack of willpower.
Today I’m completely depressed.
Par for the course.
To Some Dude: LOL watching videos of surgery. That’s genius! When “think unsexy thoughts” just doesn’t work
I’ve gone an entire year without a single drop of seed spilled. My bf was 7 percent, instead of 14 percent, I was able to remember pages of information at a time, and I was able to run faster, and my vertical increased 4 inches. Not only that, but I could have my way with any woman, married or not, girlfriend, you name it, they would eat out the palm. Something to do with the etheric body, and a breathing secret I discovered. I would share it, but absolute power corrupts.
I assume if you didn’t drop any seed, you didn’t have sex either?
Share absolute power just with me! I want to corrupt absolutely!
“Think about what people who abstain, especially in the army etc. for like a year. They lose all interest in it. I have read this many times. Soldiers report of having lost the urge to have sex”
This was written earlier in this thread. That worries me but you had the oppisiste effect which is great to hear. Before I started masturbating too often I never masturbated at all. Probably never did untill I was 18 or so. I am trying to remember how I felt. I know I didn’t lose interest in sex but maybe that’s impossible when you’re a teenager.
A couple of questions for you. Before you went the whole year, without dropping you seed how much information could you remember? Also, could you have women eating out of your palm if you weren’t flirting with them? Just from your presence?
A couple more
I’ll tell you what. I was a straight A student in highschool. There came a time though, after smoking for some time, that my life started falling apart. The way i stopped smoking cigarettes was to stop masterbating. I was edgy and almost went to jail several times, but eventually i did lose interest so to speak, but rather than lose it, it was at my command.
The sex function and all addiction are intertwined. This is just the nature of man. The first chakra is about sex. When we eat, a few hours later, we feel like having sex….sex is there, but we have to bring the energy up. You may not get rich, but you will get better in whatever it is you want to do. You will feel like you have add at first, you may change radically, even occupations. But in the end, you will be able to feel your soul and know the spirit of a matter. This is where the power comes.
it improves memory but it also makes it hard to initially memorize because of fighting the urge, you have to do it without repressing, does that make sense?
“Say, I want it, but i don’t need it”
I never was normal growing up. I’m still not. I was an extremely shy nerd (am a lot better now as I have worked on that but still am pretty shy) but yet had alpha male traits that I wasn’t supposed to have.
For the last month, I’ve been keeping a small journal every day on how I feel and what was the circumstances leading to that. So when and I masturbated and when I haven’t is definitely part of the observations. Yes, there is a difference when you do and when you don’t masturbate. This time I have gone 5 days without so far without orgasming and now I plan to go a lot further. I am pretty energetic and determined this morning.
To contribute some energy life advice here, I highly, highly reccomend people eating more organic raw food and leaving out all the processed junk. All the man altered stuff. This makes all the difference in the world in how you feel. Trust me on this. It’s very important to do this if you want to be the best person you can be.
After my own observations and a lot of reading on what attracts/repels women, I find it fascinating how much of us actions as humans are rooted from the tree of reproduction. If one thinks of the roots and the base of the tree as the need to reproduce, you will find that the branches or actions of we humans are results of the roots/base of the tree. Reproduction is the foundation. That was one of the reasons I decided I had to cut down on masturbation.
Okay, off to the gym I go:)
Placebo or not I swear I can feel more power in my testicles today. I’m determined. I’m also feeling mentally alert (though I am tired from lack sleep and I can really feel that) in a different way.
I’ve had trouble with self sacrifice in the past. Anybody here ever beat this problem while not masturbating?
i’m still reading the real donnie darko site and though long and confusing at times, it’s been enlightening respecting the negative effects of orgasm; not only that, through this and other readings and personal experience, now in my thirties, i’ve come to the conclusion that celibacy is a plus. But real abstinence not for the sake of sex, and not thinking about it; that’s where real “not-masturbating”is. You will be really amazed when you realize how much more powerful you become from a day of not even thinking about sex (hence the role of meditation) as compared to two weeks without it but thinking of it. The deal is that that’s is mental masturbation, and it definitely affects the physical, you will produce those hormones, the organ will get flooded with blood, your chemistry will change and energy will sip away from your organs; not only orgasm is bad, also thinking of sex will release valuable chemicals and fluids from your body, for instance through the urine, without going into more complicated detail.
Just experiment a few days of total-abstinence, it begins and continues in the mind, fending off temptation after temptation like flies: don’t look at that ass, look about something else, do something else, make a difference, change…you’ll notice something…
Much like any other drug, the addiction to porn and chronic masturbation is a modification of brain chemistry.
One of the ways to control these urges to masterbate is limit the sexual stimuli that are so accessible through the internet. It is important to remove the easy access to pornography and images that trigger you.
What has worked for me is to use Picblock http://www.cinchworks.com/ . You must not only block the imagery but the sexual content words to block all of the porno websites that are videos only. Set long password to protect yourself that you can’t remember… write it down and store the paper at work or somewhere that is not easily accessible.
There is some validity to this hypothesis. I’m currently into day 4 without whacking it and I feel strong. I have hit on tons of women (usually I’m a tad shy or rely on jokes) but they are incredibly receptive and many (the attractive or confident ones) flirt back. In fact I’ve got a date with a really attractive and intelligent woman. That never used to happen. Intelligence used to intimidate me (and it turned me off) but currently it doesn’t bother me. In fact I find her incredibly desirable. Both physically and emotionally.
Women stare at me more often as well. I wonder if the extra testosterone biochemically attracts females (kind like pheromones in bees). There is more to it than physical attraction though. I run faster, bowl (cricket) a lot quicker, lift stronger and I picked up a language (Japanese, lol). I haven’t turned into an elite athlete in 4 days but I am noticing a significant improvement. In 4 days I’ve become more energetic and open to experience (life that is). In terms of health I think I have better posture, my hair seems healthier, my acne improved drastically and my tinea on my right foot has nearly disappeared.
Why though? Possibly the depletion of zinc during frequent masturbation led to the health issues. The addiction (self proclaimed) may have shot my self esteem as well. The reward systems in the brain are hijacked by porn which may have developed an unhappy attitude. Also, abstinence has given me extra energy which is directed into something positive. It can’t be masturbation alone that has had such an effect as I have also worked on my diet for months and for the past year I have been exercising frequently (as opposed to sporadically). Nevertheless it seems frequent masturbation is unhealthy.
Interesting article. So, I am a female, and I just broke up with someone (long-distance relationship), and I had not been physically touched in 7 months by a man and I had not masturbated in four weeks. I really missed the touch of a man. This past weekend I masturbated before I went out to the club, and guys were all over me. Safe to say…I got touched. I never do things like this at all. I am usually shy, reserved, and a very modest dresser and was not looking to get any action. I was kinda horny but not to the point where I usually am. I definitely stepped out of my comfort zone and all of the guys were really forward. I must have been on my A game, but I definitely think masturbating before hand really helped. I will have to try it again to see if there is a trend.
So I think this is interesting. I was looking for more of a scientific article about phermones and how scents from that area can attract members of the opposite sex.
JoeBig, when you went a whole year without dropping your seed, did you notice any differences within you due to that like say at the 2 week mark, 1 month mark, 2 month mark and so on? Is going 11 months any better than say going 3 months? Did the positive effects plateau after a certain bit? Were they any negative effects? Was there any or much variance?
Since I never masturbated till I was 18 I myself went years without purposely extracting (unintentionally yes) my seed. But I never took notes on how I felt before and after I started masturbating because at the time I didn’t realise how much of a difference it could make. , I wish I did take notes. I never was normal. I was a strong nerd combined with alpha male traits. Two different people.
Now that I think about it, I think part of the reason girls liked me even though I could hardly mutter one word to them was because I didn’t masturbate. I also had an explosive temper at times which was different coming from such a quiet person. I still always felt in control though but I know I must have scared a few people. I had that after masturbation too but I think it might have lessened.
Currently 10 days without dropping my seed.
Explosive temper but I never hurt anyone
Really glad to have come across the 2003 study via this. Nevertheless, it’s worth noting that the increase isn’t 147%, it’s 47%, or an increase TO 147% of baseline, not an increase BY 147%. Namely, testosterone increases from around 374ng/dL to around 524ng/dL, not from 374 to over 1000.
I am on day 3 and I have to say I have been completely changed by this already. for years now I have certainly over indulged in masturbation and coming to this site made me immediately reconsider what I’ve been doing.
Sadly I’ve felt almost desperate to find a nice girl (or two) right now and I have not felt good about it recently. I got laid two months ago and kissed with a few hot girls since then, but I want more.
At work tonight I was on fire. I work with a lot of cute girls and tonight I was on cue, I was not anxious and basically pitiful mentally as I feel I can sometimes be. I could feel my energy orientating through everyone else. I was oozing postive energy. My energy level was through the roof. Earlier today when i sat down to read I felt much calmer and better able to comprehend the book
It really is interesting and invigorating. I am going to stick with this for a while and probably use the 7 day cycle.
Great post, great comments.
I’ll add: if you must masturbate, use a sex toy, like the Fleshlight. I’m not sure why guys settle for their hands when their are toys out there now that actually come close to simulating a vagina. I guess it’s taboo, and that’s a shame.
Apply the 7-day cycle, but replace your hand with a sex toy (Fleshlight, pocket pussy, etc).
Still a glitch in my precedent message, here the good one (I hope) :
—-
Good post indeed, I think it’s a good summary of many men experience. I would like to add something. (maybe it have already been noted, I did not read all comments)
Maybe their is a difference between masturbating to porn and masturbating using your imagination (in your mind). I have experienced with this and masturbating to porn is a very rapid and genital only experience while masturbating with your mind is a much longer, realistic and whole body experience. That would explain why some people say that masturbation make them to cum too rapidly when they have real sex, they develop the habit to have genital only and less complete sex.
The father of bioenergy, Alexander Lowen, wrote a great book about sexuality, Love and Orgasm. He speak about mature sexuality, love and also explain his view of homosexuality. He describe neurotic sexuality to be genital centered with a tense and hard body as opposed to mature sexuality to be whole. To me his view of neurotic sexuality resemble a lot to porn masturbation.
I also experience many thing you mention, especially motivation and social anxiety wise. Would be great to have best of both world.
Great post,
I went through that this whole week. No masturbation. I compared it to how my lifestyle was before : crazy change !!!
It really builds up gradually. But already after two days, you can feel the energy filling your whole body. I am much more productive and I feel much stronger mentally and physically. I felt like I could take anyone into a fight ! I managed to exercise with more strenght, it really feels like your muscles are stronger.
And with relating to people, it is so much easier to have this alpha male aura surrounding you. You don’t even have to do much, people can feel it.
It was definitely a good experience for me.
I’m changing to a 7 days cycle from now on for at least three months to see how things go.
testosterone increase wanted : “This is spartaaaaaa !!!”
This is intresting, I am trying to achieve 40 days no-mastrubation. But I still look at porn, how does porn damage you if you watch it without masturbating.
I will update my 40 days of no mastrubation
Good question. I’m at the computer a lot and I do take a look at porn once in awhile plus sometimes I’ll put an erotic picture up as motivation. I went about 21 days without orgasming until I went too far one night.
Now I’m at 15 or 16 and I’m feeling postive effects. I actually feel more horny this cycle than I did last time. I did masturbate 2 or 3 times but didn’t orgasm. Looking forward till yor 40 day update.
hey there guys, im trying to abstinate for 30 days and im about at 10 days. when younger i used to masturbate way too much and i had all the side effects. I reduced a bit last year but i want to try abstaining and i also have PE.
I don’t want to hijack this thread but I think that this is misleading. The whole point is not to stop to masturbate but to stop to masturbate to porn.
Sex is an oportunity to connect with our body, to experience deep breath, to feel present. This is what usually happen when you make love with a woman. When you do masturbate in front of porn, your experience is genital only, in fact you disconnect from your body. In lact of a partner, the best alternative is to make love to a woman in your mind. Your experience will be different, but this will be much closer to real sex than what porn can give you.
I do not have that much of experience with this, but my little experience show me that this is better like this. I feel more grounded and more present and I can do it everyday. To refrain from masturbating is not the way to go in my opinion. Sex is a wonderful tool if use rightly. Many people have experienced psychological side effects after long abstinence (those who followed Mantak Chia teaching on the subject for exemple).
After all, what can you make feel more men than to picture yourself making love to a women ?
The more you masturbate the less interest you have in going out and getting sex from a real girl. If you are fulfilling that need or at least part of it by yourself, you are less likely to go out and seek a girl. That has been my experience. If you take care of yourself one night you probably will not go out that night because the reason you were going out is to get sex, get that release. If you masturbate before going on a date you will act more beta, because you do not have that drive in you.
Does any men really need to stop to masturbate for one week to desire a women ? I think that inner well being is more important for us to easily approach women and that “healthy masturbation” help a lot with this.
I don’t do this to be right, only want to share something that is the result of a lot of struggle for me. Something that may not be at first appealing as porn or nor as easy but that pay in the long run. As it is with a lot of drug consumption.
I hope someone will try it and report back his experience (see my previous post). Everyone is different and experience may vary though.
For me personally,. I noticed a huge increase in my agressive behavior in addition to the increased hornness. Irritability as a side effect was also pronounced. both of these were more intense after the first week of continued abstinence though.
Thanks for the article. I’m gonna give the 7 days thing a shot for as long as I can keep it up and see how it goes for me. In addition, I won’t watch any porn when I jerk it.
Woohoo! I won’t be masterbating to any girls on a computer screen getting fucked by other guys! n maybe I’ll *whisper* even get laid!
The longest I’ve gone without masturbation is nine months. The first two months in my opinion were the most challenging; the last seven months were fairly easy.
Masturbation and ejaculation is mentally and physically draining. Without masturbating for nine months, physically I felt good. My mind felt sharp but I also became more emotionally solid. There was a big difference in my emotional state, which doesn’t surprise me considering the hormonal impact masturbation has.
This has been an intersting read. Since I spilt with my ex last September I have been knocking one out far too often to the point where I wasn’t really bothering to get laid. After a siz month drought I thought enough is enough and have managed to hookup with a very hot lady with a very open mind and healthy appetite. My problem has been that despite feeling horny as hell just at the thought of her I was having problems getting and maintaing the necessary equipment and I was taking an age to finish. The latter part wasn’t a problem for her but very frustrating for me so after reading this I’m going to give 7 days a try but the thought of seven days???, I can’t recall managing more than three………..
Last week I watched a re-run of Blue Mountain state, a comedy about a college football team, and one of the players had a vision and was told to abstain from any sort of pleasure for a week. He did and he became this amazing testosterone run machine and was just wrecking everyone else on the team. And was wondering if this has any truth to it or if they were just over exaggerating how it worked. So i guess what I’m asking is, does being celibate also increase your strength, anger or anything like that as well?
On day 8, and having trouble getting to sleep and staying asleep. I feel great during the day but as the day winds down I start to get uncomfortable, I get mild headaches and become restless through the night. Any ideas on how to get a good nights rest?
Just the post I was looking for. I have been searching for this kind of information but always wound up with information that masturbation is calming and whatnot and is recommended to be practiced. Recently I started to change my life in a big ways and after I decided to quit watching porn I felt motivated to find more information about masturbation and then I found this site.
It is now about 4th day of my abstaining and I am feeling great. No more timid, anxious, beta, at least a lot less then I used to feel like. I will probably abstain for about 10 days or bit more to see all the effects it can have on me.
While searching for the effects of porn on man I found very interesting article that has the similar quality as this post and will possibly be interesting read for someone out there: http://www.mentalhealthlibrary.info/library/porn/pornlds/pornldsauthor/links/victorcline/porneffect.htm#escalation
This was great. Personally, the reason I quit masturbating FOREVER was for the following two reasons:
1) It demotivated me from actually pursuing women, as you wrote about
2) The feeling of having sex is so much more satisfying than jerking off.
In regards to my first point, I love the feeling of having all this built up sexual goodness inside of me just waiting to explode and drench a woman. It makes me feel like Im doing them a service in saving myself for them. They should be thankful.
As for number two, after masturbating I think to myself, “I just sat here for about an hour with my d*ck in my hand looking at smut. I could have been doing so many other productive things.” Its always UNsatisfying those few moments of orgasm. With a woman is a different story. Its ALWAYS satisfying and Ive never thought I could be doing something better. Having an orgasm as a result of direct female contacts beats your hand ALL THE TIME!
Well in fact I’ve had a semi – mandatory 7 day jerk off routine, because of bootcamp.
Since there wasn’t much privacy involved, and I didnt fancy jerking off while some other guy was on the wall next to me taking a shit or something, I would wait for the weekend to do it. I can’t explain why, but I think the fact i was doing so much physical exercise, trying new things and not masturbating, all this combined, gave me a sort of iron will that made me want to do things that were productive all the time even after bootcamp had long gone.
So I conclude now that, 7 day ( ish) routine for self love + regular sleeping patterns + regular exercise + hard work + proper diet = awesome feeling of motivation: In fact, im going to start doing all this again. Thank you for the article, it has given me some amazing insight on my life.
I am waking up to day six of no masterbation. I can vouch for the majority of these statements, I am obviously more horny, and in the past three days, I’ve had more women responsive/approach me than I have in the past two years combined. I am what you call a chronic masterbator, started when I was about fourteen years old. I am 31 now an I have NEVER made it to 6 days with out shooting my load out. The mental clarity is real (including visualization of my now empowered sexual imagination). Shits crazy. The pheramone thing must be legit, I feel like Fuckin Superman.
I first read this post one week ago and on reading its title I thought it would be just another random blog that would have little relevance to my life. However on reading the various posts of contributors I was taken aback at firstly how frank people were and secondly how changing their masturbation habits affected them. This lead me to reflect on my own situation.
I never really thought too much about my own masturbation habits. I always considered it a private and normal thing but never something that ever really affected the way I thought, acted or behaved generally.
I no longer think that way and its only been about 4 days.
Looking back at my own habits I now have to say that I would have to categorize myself as a chronic masturbator. Ever since that first mind bending, life altering wank in the bathroom before school scarcely a day had passed when I didn’t ‘knock one out’ Scrap that. ‘Knock a few out’ . Save for several years in my teens I can honestly say that most of it has never been born out of a high sex drive. Boredom was probably the number one culprit but couple that with a baron sex life until I was in my early twenties and I ended up with a fruitless marriage of convenience between my dick and my hand. Also having read some other posts I’m now convinced my excesses are to blame for dull, limp sexual encounters.
Being 31 now and spent the last 2 years travelling the world I do feel myself at some sort of crossroads. Life for me has always been about ‘someday’ or ‘sure i’ll do that tomorrow’. when you reach 30 you do feel your time is more finite and that there is no ‘someday’. Only now. Masturbation perfectly accommodated this mindset allowing me crap sexual gratification which lead no where.
So how is the de-wanking experiment going? Currently not the life altering experience that taking it up was, but I dont think it ever will be. So far its been about not falling back on that fail-safe dopamine hit that always lead to inaction and trying to put my mind to better use. I’m not surprised that I think about sex alot, but what I am surprised about is the number of times my mind suggests an act of onanism.
I look forward to hopefully experiencing some of the effects I’ve read about. watch this space.
I know my post was long-winded but this is honestly the 1st time I’ve ever contributed to a blog.
Posting with Anon and dummy e-mail for irrelevant stuff…
But, I think this article just solved all of my problems.
I completely agree with this 100%. I started masterbating at the very early age of 7 years old. I masterbated everyday, sometimes more than twice a day until I was 18. I never got laid in high school and I never had the desire to. I was never really ambitious about doing anything. I just stayed home all day and masterbated. I felt sort of akward around people, and I always wanted to be alone. Then one day I finaly got laid. I wanted more of that but didn’t really pursue it much, because I was still masterbating. Then I heard my friend talking to one of his family members. He said he felt bad because he couldn’t help himself from masterbating. Now, my friend wasn’t the most attractive guy in the world, but somehow he almost always got laid by attractive chicks. That’s when I thought to myself, “Is that the secret? To not masterbate”? So I gave it a shot. I quit coled turkey, and it was soooooo frustrating. I was always mad, and I couldn’t stand still. After a week, it became much easier. I noticed that I was more active and confident around not only attractive females, but all people. I would start making moves on females that I would never make moves on before. I eventually ended up being in a 2 year relationship with a super attractive chick, that I would never in a million years have the guts to even look at for to long during my masterbation days.
Yes masterbation is normal and everybody does it, but just stop for a while. Get over the frustation part of it, and witness how much more confidence you have in your everyday life.
Everybody has a different set of genes. We are different. Some people have to marry lest they burn inside. Others are somehow able to abstain, even their whole lives without any problem. Some had to work at it all their lives. The sex thoughts for some completely dissapear. It is a conscious choice. Others are just that way. Masturbating is healthy in extreme moderation but it is not the purpose of our purpose. Love is. Over sex is eqaully unhealthy.
Stopping and holding thus abstaining from climax can if extended too often cause the developement of spermidicells which are small balls that develop right on your balls. They can cause pain or other complictions.
Sadly, I relapsed last week but Im back on it again and its been about 4 or 5 days now. But it feels different now. When I initially started I felt the horny tingling in my balls when a good looking girl walked by but I dont have that now. I dont know what the deal is. I used to welcome that feeling because it made me more aggressive with the ladies but its gone. It seems as tho Im losing my sex drive this go around. The once positive aspects of masturbation (being more aggressive with women for one) is gone…
Holding off for a week is not going to do jack shit! You don’t start to reabsorb your semen making you strong, brave, heroic, and manly until after 3 months of semen retention.
I usually retain 21 days t0 90 days.
I’m currently on my 26th day and I feel incredible.
Savage, I am absolutely impressed that I wasn’t the only one in the world thinking this. A couple years back I noticed that the common denominator in some of my short comings as a person was pretty much jacking off too much. So I stopped for a while. I went to parties, got some punani, and got amazingly fit. And so I freaking love you for making this public. On a side note, my dandruff reduced considerably when I stopped, so if anybody’s got chronic dandruff problems, try this!
Damn, it feels good to be going strong on this one again. Its been about a week now and Im mentally committed to this FOREVER. My problem was that I would look at porn “just because” and told myself I had no intention of jerking off. That would happen several times without me actually masturbating then I would relapse and I would relapse hard. For me, if I dont have that visual online stimulus I dont care for masturbation. I only want to masturbate when I look at porn, never if Im blue balled or something. So for me the fix is easy, remember the reasons why I want to stop and find other things to do with my free online time. COLD TURKEY and I aint lookin back fellas.
Masturbation is SELF ABUSE. it will undoubtedly reduce your self esteem and self worth, even if you do not agree, it is still the truth. it is in no way a substitute for good sex.. feeling sexy? find a beautiful chic, suck her out, give it to her hard and wild and feel great about yourself… rather than stroking urself out. MASTURBATION is for the BETA MALE, d weaklings. The ALPHA MALE needs sex and does it with a pretty chic that is worthy of his semen. Thank you
This definitely makes a lot of sense. Thanks Matt for making this public. I’ve had a lot of free time so I’ve been “fapping” haha pretty much every day and I felt horrible. Although other factors in my life may have made it conducive for sadness and depression, I feel fapping made it much worse and allowed these feelings to perpetuate. I’m on day 3 and I’m committed.
Kind of like the movie 40 days and 40 nights where every girl starts to want Josh Hartnett (forgot the characters name) after he starts abstaining, I guess the pheromones really start to work on women.
Though I hate using examples in movies, this is applicable.
To answer some peoples concerns, I feel that jerking off is necessary at times. Anyone who can get some whenever they want a the snap of a finger is a GOD. Maybe some people can but most definitely not me.
I always look at girls in a sexual way but I suspect itll increase now. Has anyone noticed this happening a lot more after abstaining?
Hopefully my abstinence can carry over to other parts of my life and start to lift my spirits.
Yea your right Jay, it will increase now. I was able to do 6 days and I was just looking at everything. Since then I haven’t been able to stop. I want to go for 2 weeks – a month but its hard. I ve already broken it 3 times since I have last tried.
Going to start again and hopefully I can get whacking off out of my head.
Jay,
It WILL carry over to other parts of your life. Firstly, you’ll just feel more complete and self satisfied by knowing you have control over your mind and your body. That in itself will translate positively into every aspect of your life.
I felt like you after masturbating, just worthless and sad sometimes and knowing that feeling will come is an extra motivator to not masturbate.
Keep strong fellas. Lets do this!! Were men, we aint children who fall at every sign of temptation.
Study: Endocrine response to masturbation-induced orgasm in healthy men following a 3-week sexual abstinence.
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/11760788?ordinalpos=16&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum
” These effects were observed both before and after sexual abstinence. In contrast, although plasma testosterone was unaltered by orgasm, higher testosterone concentrations were observed following the period of abstinence. These data demonstrate that acute abstinence does not change the neuroendocrine response to orgasm but does produce elevated levels of testosterone in males.”
Positive aspects (after 7 days):
-Increase in motivation to whatever I focus my mind on
-Increase in happiness, finding random shit funny
-More social
-Social anxiety reduced
-Smiling more
-I feel more connected to people around me
-I feel calmer and I can focus alot better than before
-Easier to stick to routines and doing mundane stuff
-Increase in confidence
As for the negative, mood swingin’ is the only thing I can come up with right.
Abstinence fucking rocks. Seeev your seeemen fur the weeemen. *some random fucked english accent*
Also, my memory is better!
I also get these strange nostalgia-memory feelings from nowhere!
I’m also trying this after reading this article, just for the hell of it. I gotta say I haven’t felt so drastic changes as some other people here report. I’m on day six. But today I feel like I had a shitload of caffeine or something, I have this weird pent up energy that I can’t get rid of. It’s pretty uncomfortable actually, but I’ll try to ignore it, since I’m curious to see what (hopefully positive) effects this experiment will have if I continue a while longer.
I am on day 53 and I feel more manly, dominant, and aggressive. I also am more charismatic and outgoing. My voice has also gotten deeper. My memory has enhanced. I have skin that’s glowing; and my energy level is higher than ever person inside the room. (besides the kids). I just feel more powerful!
DAMN PETE!!!! 53 days? Nice. Ive relapsed a few times but Im in the 2nd week of it and I will not relapse this time. I sort of had to have a moment of self-conversation to really see the reasons why I was doing this and Ive never felt better.
“This guy”,
That “weird energy” is the initial effect of the lack of masturbating. I know exactly what you mean. Just use that energy and focus it somewhere else, like at the gym.
>Rashad
Yeah, you’re probably right, and I did think about going to the gym, but decided against it since I had been to the gym the day before and I didn’t want to overtrain. I’m curious to see if I’m gonna have a permanent energy boost from this experiment.
On a side note, I was at a party last night where the host told me that one of girls (whom I had never met) fancied me. I ended up sleeping with another girl, but I was pretty wasted, so the sex was pretty meh for me and I didn’t finish (I can go forever when I’m drunk). I don’t know if my abstinence from masturbation had anything to do with attracting these girls, but I will be sure to look for a patterns in the coming weeks.
This Guy,
There we go! I think not masturbating does help in attraction. I think its a pheromone thing, like these girls can sense that we have all this sexual energy some how. As far as it being a permanent energy, Ive noticed it has its peaks and valleys. You might go for stretches of days with the buzz of energy then one day it may not be as high. Thats how it is for me but it might be diff for you based on what your body chemistry is like.
I just wanted to check in. I have this page bookmarked, HAHA. Back to football. Go Packers!
This article is heaven-sent. The article and the comments all concur with my own experiences. I am now 28 years old and have struggled with chronic masturbation since I was around 16. Right around 22, I began losing my hair in the frontal area of my scalp. By age 26, my hair loss accelerated to the crown, and although I still have hair on my head, I have lost considerable amounts. Throughout this time, I masturbated between one and two times a day. Recently, I tried stopping for one week and noticed that less hair was in bathtub after showering. I also felt much more confident, less feelings of insecurity and more virile. I just felt electric. I can only imagine that these feelings get better throughout the months after abstaining. However, I am pretty confident that my hairloss is due to my excessive masturbation, since both of my parents did not lose hair at such a young age. This might be due to abnormal testosterone conversion into DHT, which is linked to hairloss in men.
I have been relapsing off and on throughout the years and hopefully after reading this article, I will have the motivation to stop for a longer period of time. Seeing all of these comments with similar symptoms is all the proof that I need. I will be using my laptop in public versus in private to avoid the temptation to look at porn. I will keep you posted.
Dave,
In all honesty, its easy not to relapse and extremely difficult at the same time. Im sure everyone knows this. The best deterrent is to do what your doing (public vs. private internet use) or just discipline yourself to not go on those sites. The only time I wanna masturbate is when Im searching for it, never anytime else.
Rashad,
Thanks for responding. Your absolutely right. Abstaining from masturbation is tough. It really is a chemical addiction per se, not unlike those faced by certain drug users. I’ve had problems with concentration, maintaining erections, mild depression and mood swings. I never realized that far-reaching impact that testosterone and dopamine have on the body. I’m just hoping that these side-effects disappear after a few months.
Although I read articles on alternative medicine websites that discussed the dangers of chronic masturbation, I never took it too seriously, since Western medicine has yet to provide enough conclusive evidence to demonstrate this phenomenon. I should have been more open minded. Check out “sexual exhaustion” while running a Google search.
I’ve never been away from masturbation for more than a week and a half, so I’m not sure what I would experience after that period of time elapses. But I can say with certainty, that after four days of no masturbation, I feel like a different person. I’m far more sociable, creative and productive.
I would always tell myself, I’ll watch porn for 30 minutes or so and promise myself not to masturbate. You know the outcome. At this point, I’m done with porn. It’s not worth the risk now or in the long run. May we both overcome this habit.
I wanted do thank you for posting this article up, this read has encouraged me into abstaining for 2 weeks now, despite being sick I can already tell that i have more energy and more motivation to do activities than I did when i was masturbating every day. not only that but its easier to talk to people and actually be able to carry on a conversation. I’m only 20 years old and I have a lot of patching up to do in my life, and this has definitely put me headed in the right direction, as I’ve been addicted to pornography since the age of 12, and by the age of 16 I barely had any motivation in school (depression) and hardly any motivation to have a girl friend.
My goal right now is to abstain for about 3 months total, and I hope to have gain huge improvements in my lifestyle from doing this. Good luck to everyone struggling with this as well, I wish you all the best.
I’ve really been enjoying the last 10+ days of not masturbating or watching porn at all and I feel like I could go on forever.
I, too, have had a lot more energy and motivation to do all kinds of things. I’ve actually found my long gone musical inspiration once again + music in itself has started to sound better and deeper.
Here are some encouraging stories that have really helped me a lot:
http://yourbrainonporn.com/rebooting-accounts
So I got to day 13 and I couldn’t take it anymore. I went to a party the same night and was pursued very persistently by a girl whom I’m not interested in. There was another girl there who I’ve hooked up with once before and wouldn’t mind hooking up with again, but that was thwarted by the other girl. Oh well. But it seems I was deemed attractive despite the fact that I’d masturbated earlier that day. But it is almost impossible to determine what impact abstinance has on your luck with women, at least when you don’t have more data than I have. I think I’ll start having 7- or 14-day cycles of masturbation abstinence from now on as I did notice some interesting effects on my testostorone, but I don’t wanna go completely “no fap”. Everything in moderation, masturbation and abstinance alike.
This Guy,
Hey man, I understand. The cycling is a good idea also. Ima admit I relapsed last night after coming back from a Halloween party, there was just so much booty out it was insane. Female costume are just the sexy version of something: sexy nurse, teacher, dog etc. No imagination required at all. But Im getting off point. I was gonna post something on here but I felt like I talked myself up so much that posting my relapse (again) would be lame, HAHA. But it was around 12 days for me and I didnt feel any shame in relapsing, I just felt like it needed to be done. Your right, moderation is key and cycling is probably the best bet. The key is just dont let masturbation become your exclusive sexual release. When it becomes your only orgasm…thats when you have the problem.
Rashad,
I had the same feeling, I didn’t feel like I had failed when I relapsed either. Seems like we have the same outlook on this subject. It is important, as Modern Savage also writes somewhere, not to think that abstinence is some magic formula that automatically will get us girls. It is merely a tool which for some people can be helpful when used correctly.
Alrite..
first of all, credit to who deserves it.. yes you Savage..
Now I never had a problem getting women.. I have had sex with over 300 women so far (Im 31 – lost virginity at 17)
Once in high school I stopped fapping for a WHOLE MONTH and to be honest I still remember a little how good and strong I felt..
I either fucked or fapped at least 5 times a week (some exceptions of course – where only had sex and let me tell you it was good now when I think back)
Long story short recently broke a girl’s heart and realized how I have been treating women and need to stop cheating, lying, manipulating women and use them for sex.. along with figuring out where I am in life and everything I wanted to tackle this fapping issue.. I always knew in my heart I shouldn’t..
Anyways, learned alot from this blog and I am stopping cold turkey.. Im bald and skinny but Ima charmer and a sweet talker and that gets me through every woman;s barrier.. Ima natural my friends think.. I am not gonna fap but Im still going to have sex.. still no strings attached but I’ll be honest instead of playing head games..
AND.. I will keep you guys updated.. Its been four days since I last masturbated but I did have sex last night with a cute mommy I picked up last week.. Im going on a work trip to toronto this weekend.. although I got 2 girls lined up there for me, Im NOT going to masturbate.. I usually jerk off EVERY SHOWER so once a day and sometimes twice :p
Hey guys, this was an awesome article that gave me some inspiration to abstain from masturbating to see what would happen.
I also suggest you guys check out:
http://www.reddit.com/r/NoFap
and
http://www.yourbrainonporn.com
I know some guys are in it for the 7-day cycle, rather than completely no fap, but it’s really awesome to hear the experiences of guys who are already good with women and trying out No Fap. There are a lot of guys on r/NoFap that agree that even guys who are clueless with women, virgins, or forever-alone types are getting ridiculous improvements with their relations with women, myself included, with No Fap.
Thanks!
NoFapEnthusiast,
Thanks for the links, some good info on there. Im now at the point where I want to get back into it full time, as in, no fapping ever (I’m using this word “fap” for the first time in history, never used it before today). I just want to rid my life of porn altogether. Im at the stage in my life where I dont want to be involved with anything that isnt progressing my life forward and I feel like searching for erotica and masturbating grinds my life to a halt for hours at a time. Yes, I relapsed recently and I felt no shame, but that feeling of having mastery over my mind and body is a thrill in its own. I had a high from it, knowing that I had willpower and self control and it translated positively into other aspects of my life. Im back on it fellas. Third times the charm, right? I know what mistakes I made last time and I wont make them again.
Rashad
I went to the yourbrainonporn-website and I gotta say it’s pretty convincing. So I’ll also stop watching porn, though it’s gonna be tough.
@ Rashad – Ditto on the “fap” vernacular. I, too, have recently recognized the debilitating, adverse effects masturbation/pornography were having on my life. After over 15 year in slavery and bondage to both I am finally, through knowledge, understanding, wisdom, and the power and strength of Christ, breaking free from the shackles of iniquity and walking out from under the shadow of evil. I had been experimenting with the 7 – day cycle before I even stumble across this website and, after reading these testimonies and stories provided here by all of you, my own experiences have been all but confirmed. I am much, much, more socially adroit not only with women I fancy but with everybody. My axiety is a sprinkle of what it used to be and I can confidently look people in the eyes and carry on a more controlled, intelligent conversation. The boucne in my step has returned. The glow of my skin is luminous. My stuttering has stopped! And the black bags under my eyes have disappeared altogether! I’m more dominant, assertive, and level headed. I attract the attention of women wherever I go and my erections have been bigger and stronger. Women absolutely have some sort of innate ability to sense wether of not a man is already in a relationship with Mary Palm and her five sisters. The pheremone revelation is an interesting one. I should have to look more into it.
Please, if there is anybody reading this who wishes to escape from pornography for good, I am going to recommend you do two (2) things:
1) Repent. Ask God to forgive you and then ask for His help.
2) On youtube.com, watch:
a. “Pornography -Through Jesus’ Eyes-” by fotm1 (Doug Perry)
b. “Porn -Soul Ties- Danger!” by fotm1 (Doug Perry)
c. “Impartation -Transference-” by fotm1 (Doug Perry)
This is not a chastisement of masturbation. I still partake in it, just, not on a 2-5 times per day basis anymore. It is my ardent prayer that these videos will awaken you to the spiritual, mental, physical, and emotional oppression that pornography perpetrates. Go as long as you can without masturbation but do your best to keep it between 14 and 21 days. I myself have never gone beyond 17, but, praise God, what a difference! Next goal: 21 days!
@ Mhollerho Abimbola Enoch – Masturbation really is for the beta male. Don’t settle for second best, men. Be an Alpha Wolf!
@ This Guy – I knwo how you feel. I felt the same way. This is what I found. Porn addiction is just like any other addiction be it drugs, cigarettes, or alcohol. Yes, it is tough to quit on your on sheer will power and strength, but, through the power and might of Jesus Christ which strengthens you, you can do anything. After some weeks of abstaining from pornography, just the mere thought of it turned me off. My attitude towards it did a complete 180. Years of porn abuse was making it difficult for me to get an erection when I was with a REAL women. It’s really not a matter of should you stop. It’s a matter of you MUST stop. For your own overall health and dignity as a man. Check out those videos I suggested above. They really helped me! This, the beginninig, is going to be the hardest for you. An old chinese proverb states “A journy of 1000 miles starts with a single step.” You already took yours. If one man can recover any man can recover! I’m proud of you and will keep you and everyone struggling with this evil at the very center of my prayers.
@Blood of the Wolf – I’m not religious, so I’ll have to rely on my own willpower, but thanks anyway:). First time I lasted 12 days. Second time I only lasted four days because I simply couldn’t fall asleep one night and I had to get up early the next day, so in the end I gave in. But this has only strengthened my resolve not to give in this time. This time I’m gonna begin with being fap (and porn) free for the rest of November and see what happens.
Hello everyone. This is just an update since my last post. I am on my eighth day of no PMO, and I can say for a fact, it has been incredibly difficult.
Day 1: Mild depression but otherwise no noticeable effects.
Day 2: I felt a gradual spike in my overall mood. I had a difficult time falling and staying asleep.
Day 3: I felt noticeably more horny throughout the day. I still had difficulties falling asleep and staying asleep. I attribute this to withholding from masturbation, which has caused me to be more aroused.
Day 4: I had the day off of work, so I didn’t have an opportunity to gauge my interactions with people. Overall, I did feel more complete and energetic.
Day 5: I had more energy although lack of sleep was noticeable. I was on fire at work. My increase in energy and concentration was definitely felt by the customers at work. A lot of them smiled during conversations and I felt a strange magnetism to girls that I found attractive. There was greater eye contact and a sense of warmth and strength in the pelvic region.
Day 6: I still had trouble getting a good nights rest. My energy levels seem to have plateaued.
Day 7-8: I am hoping that I get back in to my normal sleep cycle, as my sleep deprivation seems to be overriding the increase in energy from no PMO. My level of horniness seems to have subsided just a little. I don’t have the strong urge to masturbate nor do I feel a need to look at porn. It is difficult having to go to work with no sleep and I am proud of myself for not giving in and PMO’ing to put myself to sleep.
I’ve lost a good amount of hair in the frontal region of my scalp as well as lost the strong “clenching”erections of my teenage years. I miss looking at an attractive woman and getting a “full” spontaneous erection. These reasons are enough to motivate me to press forward. As of now, my erections have improved somewhat but no were near the quality during my youth. I still have a long way to go. This is a challenging process for me since I am venturing into unknown territory. There have times when I wanted to succumb to temptation, but I have managed to struggle through it. I envision myself with improved confidence, dating a beautiful woman. That keeps me going. I will keep you posted.
In interesting article…
http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/releases/136672.php
My teenage years were more about depression, lack of self-confidence, and lots of masturbation than anything else. In my 16th year I pretty much gave up on girls my age and fantasized about underage girls and fantasies escalated to depravity. And it all goes back to my early childhood. Who would’ve guessed, huh? Had to do with shame over being caught playing doctor with a neighborhood girl. Anyway, I wasted my 20′s on sexual fantasy, as an escape, as an easy way out, and instant gratification and suspense. 34 years old now and more or less a virgin. I have had my chances and bed encounters but I have equated sexual settings with social settings and turned off the passion by instinct. Complacent also as to how to actually carry out an intercourse. What’s expected, and what the limits are. Also, the bar for what makes me excited is set high, and I currently need perverted stuff to get a hard-on. Been a Christian for 7 years. Doesn’t really go hand in hand with an unyielding consumption of porn.
Well, I’m on day 3 now. No porn, no masturbation. Yesterday, a little naughty banter with an online girl I know. Didn’t get much of an erection. Voice is getting deep again. Moody. Aggressive, even towards my cat unfortunately. Not noticing an energy surge yet. Hands feel stronger, firmer. Voice increasingly deeper.
I will report back in a few days.
Noticed that I used the wrong word in my previous post. I didn’t mean “complacent” but “confused”. English in not my native tongue.
Mattias,
This will definitely help you. Youve said youre already experiencing the effects? Well, put those effects to good use. Join a gym if your more aggressive. Seriously, from your post you dont seem like the gym type, but getting your body in shape will only double, or triple, the effects of giving up masturbation. Once you know how to channel the positive aspects of this thats when you win. Dont relapse for nothing man, its not worth it. Good luck, partner.
Alright…after reading ALL the comments on here…I REALLY want to try this. I’m 16 years old, been masturbating since I turned 13. I masturbate everyday. I plan to do the 7 day cycle since I am in powerlifting:P I’m pretty muscular (I got big biceps, triceps and abs) and I weigh 125. I want to be able to do more pounds and look more buffer…so I want to stop because it’s a complete waste of time…and not only that, my left arm is weaker than my right hand? (I’m a lefty…therefore shouldn’t it be stronger??)
Anyway, should I try the 7 day cycle? (Masturbate every Saturday…so since I weight lift and I’m going to start taking whey protein again…Double the testosterone…double the muscle gain?
)
Or should I stop masturbating completely?
Hi everyone,
Unfortunately, I relapsed after 15 days of no PMO. I saw an attractive girl at work today and came home with the desire to look at pictures. The pictures soon turned into pornographic images and it was all downhill from there. It’s a vicious cycle. From now on, I’m going to stay away from images of any kind (short skirts, etc.). In my opinion, even these seemingly tame images can be just as bad as pornography. It’s better to stay away from them all together. It was a foolish mistake on my part, but I am not going to beat myself up over it. I’ll start again today.
Needless to say, those two weeks brought with them an increase in energy levels (overall and in the pelvic region), somewhat harder erections (although not quite where I would like them to be) and more social. There were days however when I felt irritable and wanted to stay away from social encounters. Overall though, during that time, I felt more personable and flirtatious. I can imagine how I would feel if I go beyond a mere two weeks. Wish me luck as I pick up the pieces and continue on this arduous journey. It’s harder than it first appears to be.
TO RASHAD, how long has it been since you last relapsed?
Guys, after abstaining from orgasm but still masturbating for various lengths of time I decided to quit it. I accidently orgasmed a couple of time plus there were a couple of times where I just wanted to orgasm and did.
So now I’ve gone 44+ days without any masturbation at all whatsoever and it’s going to stay that way. I have even watched really limited porn as a test and listened to moaning videos . I enjoy the harder erections over masturbating now. The advantages outweigh the disadvantages abd there is a difference imo between masturbating and no orgasm vs no masturbating at all. The latter being the better.
And yes as DAVE said, everything can be a temptation. I was looking at motivational videos and somebody posted this incredible video of these gorgeous twins. Immediatly favoured!! I have no fear though that I will masturbate again. I’ve given up masturbation forever.
Just don’t start. It’s easier that way because once you start it becomes much more tempting to keep on going.
Rashad,
Actually I am an avid gym goer, just not as consistent with it as I should be. I build muscle fast, lift heavy, and feel really good about myself afterwords. I’m kind of going back and forth between the physical and highly sexual mode, and the more contemplative almost asexual mode. Really, the feeling of being in love often override my sexual desires. Which is bad if the girl is borderline oversexed (which most girls are, hehe).
At any rate, I messed up my abstinence routine and fell back after 4 days. Then followed a masturbation spree of 3 days, at the end of which my balls reduced in size some. But actually…I think I’m more geared towards ejaculating 1-2 times a week, because my voice got even deeper the day after my first masturbation. My body seems to produce semen rapidly, but this time around I will wait until my testicles feel rock hard, and then a couple of days more to really max out the testosteron production. So, from today, another abstinence period of at least 4, at the most 7 days. If it works well I might try 14 days for my next period. Wish me good luck.
Note to self: Don’t try to resist getting an erection when seeing hot girls or when thinking a naughty thought. If I do resist, this will teach my mind that getting an erection is bad. It’s the frequent masturbating and specifically the ejaculation that’s the problem to combat. So…keep myself busy, look for distractions and…use sheer will power!!!
Dave,
Its been about 3+ weeks since my last relapse. Ive gotten to the point where I have no interest in looking at porn. I really dont. Its weird because the last time I did this my sex drive was through the roof and I ended up relapsing out of frustration, but now it seems to have disappeared. Im still interested in women but porn and beating off isnt my thing anymore.
To Mattias,
Oh ok. Didnt meant or diss you or anything but I just didnt get the gym vibe from your post for some reason. Honestly, you’ll do so much better in the gym now. Whenever I go to the gym and see all those phat booties in those yoga pants it just motivates me to lift harder and fster, HAHA. And since you’ll have that added aggression, testosterone and energy from not jerking off you’ll make even better gains.
To JP,
I feel you man. Ive given it up forever too. Masturbation is the refuge of the lonely man and Im done with it.
If you’ve already been masterbating frequently, I strongly recommend to not drop it completely all of a sudden, unless you are getting sexual pleasure from women.
I had abstained for a whole month and a half after I had previously masterbated frequently – usually around 5-10 times a week. Then I felt like challenging myself to 2 weeks abstinence from masterbation. Of course the first few days were difficult, and after the first week it started to become easier to resist. And I completed 2 weeks, and I barely had the urge to masterbate from then on, so I didn’t.
1 and a half months later… n I decide to follow the tips on this page where you reach your peak after about 7 days abstaining, so I masterbated to begin this phase, and it was quite honestly the least pleasurable wank I have ever had in my entire life!
So if you are going to abstain for long periods of time, I recommend cutting down slowly…. So one week, followed by 2, then 3 if u really want to.
However I only did masterbate again to try and reach the peak as it suggested on here, because hopefully I’ll be quite sensitive by the weekend… Which I need to be
dude , ive never heard such a powerful article before , god bless you , i ve spent years looking for someone , just anybody that shares the same experience and same thoughts about this habbit and its dangerous effects that is some how not shown directly to the minds of people even doctors , people cant really understand how bad this habbit may lead them to through their lives , destroying social life and sexual life and health , semen is the brains food , not only the brain but also the soul , i am really impressed by the chart you shown us , never heard about it before but its reveals a good secret that motivate people to abstain masturbation and try this out to let them know the secret.
Porn used to be cocaine for me. I had 3 subscriptions going on sites, and just kept feeding into it until one day I’d had enough. I felt sick.
When my last girl found out I’d quit masturbating, she put a lot more into our encounters. She would also blatant about having sex several times a night instead of just once like we used to. At a happy hour her coworker joked “Can I borrow him sometime?”
Re: some dude … Haha well done on the surgery videos! One trick for me is I have a folder full of images of cockroaches and cockroach infestations right before my porn folder. Nothing like a vile, disgusting spiny legged cockroach to kill your urge to relapse!
I also make it a point to google “cockroach” every time I have the urge to surf porn on the net. Works like a charm!
Guys…does ‘blowing’ a little bit count as a relapse? For example, I have fun with myself then I stop…but I keep on going because I don’t want to have “blue balls” so I just let out a little bit. Not to the point where the whole load comes out and I feel sleepy/exhausted…no. Just a little bit. Does that ruin my 8 days of abstaining? Does it affect the benefits of not masturbating?
Louie, I believe that does ruin it. Not sure exactly what you mean by “let out a little bit” but if you feel a little bit of “relief” after, means you’ve probably ruined it. The whole point is to let that energy and testosterone circulate within your bloodstream and to channel that all that power through your muscles, mind and confidence. Letting even a “little bit” out seems to defeat the purpose.
I didnt feel relief
by a little bit, I mean a little bit of “juice” came out instead of the whole load :p But alright I’ll try it once more without relapsing a bit:)
I started masturbatin wen i was 15, but i cud remember dt d 1st time i did it was blood which came out. I felt it was so bcos of d presure of my hand. I av had it since dt time everytime in d bath and i wouldnt sleep at nite witout it. I dont av any girl frnd cos i dont even no how 2 engage in a talk wt dem. At a time i tried nt to masturbate but dat eventually resorted into porn movies, which has also always ended with mastyrbation. I decided not to ejaculate wen i tot i was loosing to much of semen by holdin my dick at d time i was feelin to really come.. Does,dat also have effect?…what do i do?
I find the problem is ot masturbation per se but being stimulated by pornographic images rather a tease from your girlfriend or your imagination. It is like I feel I was being cheated b/c my effort was wasted.Whereas with your girlfriend or imagination you can interact ,experiment and learn things rather than being in a zombie mode like when watching porn
Regards
I find the problem is not masturbation per se but being stimulated by pornographic images rather a tease from your girlfriend or your imagination. It is like I feel I was being cheated b/c my effort was wasted.Whereas with your girlfriend or imagination you can interact ,experiment and learn things rather than being in a zombie mode like when watching porn
Regards
There is a lot of documented evidence that excessive masturbation is harmful in many ways and I personally agree. You are more likely to get depressed if you masturbate a lot. The one thing that is not mentioned here is that having sex with a woman and masturbating creates very different results. For me masturbation is primarily a stress reliever. I have found that your body knows when you ejaculate in a woman and there is a sense of contentment that you get from that that is not possible to get from anything else. Even using a condom reduces the effect.
I am in completely agreement with your assessment. A 5-7 days cycle is a good balance.
Personally I have experienced that if I go without wanking for more than 5-7 days, I will relieve myself in a wet dream. May be that was one of the original reasons that after 7 days the testosterone levels fall back.
Oh my god. All of your research is exactly what I thought would happen if I attempted to resist masturbation.
I completely am with you and I have evidences to support this theory. I will give a link later….
in my personal experience, abstaining does help a lot. i abstained from masturbation for 8 days and found that my energy levels have boosted up. i used to be a lousy player in every game. lack of confidence, no performance, stupid moves n all. but beleive me, abstaining has made me better in every game, i run longer, bat good and my bowling is almost perfect. believe me guys abstaining helps.
i am now determined to never masturbate again….
so where do i fit into all of this?.
i am 39 years old; i have cerebral palsy; i’m a virgin;
i masturbate 2 or 3x a week, i dont go out; meet women or any of that; porn helps but im not addicted
Hi guys,
I wanna explain my own experiences,
Actually I don’t have lots of info in medical science but i experienced something which is very amazing.
a few years ago i abstained for more that 3 weeks. in the 3th week i felt that whenever i go the girls are attracted to me and it was very easy to pickup one. even i tried this abstain for my exams and really got good grades. You know, I’m sure that this phenomena gives me more inner energy, so by that I’m more lucky. I’m not sure if I could tell what i want, but i wanna say that in my opinion and according to my experiences keeping away from masturbation gives us more inner energy. in contrast when i masturbate i easily loos my connections with girls. it happened to me several times. As I’m handsome sometimes the girls attracted to me but after making the relationship and as soon as i start masturbating they disappear. I’m sure that there is a relationship between masturbation and Inner energy (Metaphysics).
Does anyone has the same experience?
i still masterbate, wank, jerk but not off! ever since i learned about tantriatic or tantra i can beat my meat reach pleassure without depleting protein which is what semen consist of. at least you learn more than self controlll and will have a very interesting sex life with your partners…..so read up!
19 days so far so some observations:
-less sleep, down from 7.5 to 6 hours a night
-lots more energy/drive. Will get shit done efficiently
-more time and focus, I’ve read more in these last few weeks than in months
-First week was difficult, 2nd week was easy, 3rd week was a bit more difficult than the last
-Morning periods the most difficult in the 2nd-3rd weeks. However, the urge during the day is essentially gone
I have suffered from PE since I started having sex. I think this has had to do with my early experience masturbating. The PE has lead to a lack of confidence in my sex life, lack of sexual drive and overall dissatisfaction with sex and relationships.
I started abstaining last week when I started reading The Enlightened Sex Manual by David Deida. I started reading the book because I decided to do something about the PE. In the book David preaches about achieving orgasm without ejaculation. This is the ultimate goal for me.
After successfully abstaining for 4 days I was feeling really good, full of energy and confident. I would have no problem holding off for a few more days as I was channeling my energy into self improvement specially around the areas of meditation and working out (I am currently doing the Insanity program which is super challenging and takes care of all that extra energy). The problem is that last night I had a wet dream. I woke up feeling bad about it because I really wanted to hold out longer.
So my question is, if you have a wet dream does that count as ejaculating through masturbation? Does that mean that I need to reset the day count and start over at day one?
I’m relying completely on wet dreams, now. I’ve never had one before, since I’ve been masturbating since I was 11. I’m nearly16 now. i usually masturbate 2-3 times a day. I work out fairly rigorously every day. I do have a question. During puberty I have heard that how sexually attractive you are is determined by how much testosterone or estrogen at puberty for males and females, respectively. So if I jerked off three times a day every day during puberty I probably had low testosterone, right? FUCK ME.
To Jake: I masturbated a lot during puberty, and have always felt like a kid that never grew up. I think I have had low testosterone levels due to the fact that I didn’t let my testicles fill up before I ejaculated. As a result my testicles became relatively small. Been using a light testicle stretching program for the last year to make them hang lower (in combination with abstinence 4-7 days at a time) and…well…my beard growth has increased, voice is deeper, and I’m aggressive (in a good way, not afraid of anyone these days no matter their size). I was an idiot to masturbate so much during youth (34 now) and thus deplete my semen. I didn’t have much guidance, was depressed, and didn’t know how to handle girls, so I gave in to the hand.
When I was in school, I once went half a semester without masturbating. I didn’t do much of ANYTHING, actually, because I was REALLY focused trying to maintain a 4.0 GPA. One morning, I looked up from my papers and books and thought I had magical sexual powers like you described. Really, though, it was just my imagination. I was interpreting everything everyone said as a sexual advance. I went around for a few days like this, sweating profusely, flirting with EVERYONE, and on the last day I got an erection that WOULDN’T GO AWAY. I was shaking I was so horny, my clothes were sopping wet with sweat. My pants couldn’t hide it. ALL DAY. I had to go home early. I realized that I hadn’t masturbated since I could remember, so I had a marathon session that night, and my problems went away. This article on Wikipedia describes the psychological symptoms/”sexual powers” I was feeling during those few days very well: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Involuntary_celibacy
Well Tom, I wish I had erections that wouldn’t go away. It’s been years and years since I could get a full erection from just looking at a sexy girl. My mind understands the sexual attraction but my penis doesn’t get the signal unless I look at really wild porn or fantasize about pretty off-the-wall stuff AND stroke. Anyway, I’m on day 4 now (again) and very moody. Woke up with a medium hard-on this morning. Gonna blow off some steam at the gym.
Great post,
30 y/o male here…I have been struggling with wanking since I was introduced to it from the tender age of 8 by a friend. I look back, I spent most of my high school years awkward and shy, even though I was good looking and one of the best athletes around. I went bald very early… although I am genetically predisposed but noone went bald that early in either side. I did manage to get laid a few times here and there after high school, but nothing was satisfactory and i couldn’t cum from sex and would lose erections frequently. I always have been into “esoteric” knowledge, and I came across something that said men should not waste their semen (jing) and it all made sense to me. I quit for a while, met a nice hot girl and we had great sex…. during this time i was magnetic, i evolved from a guy chicks liked as a friend to a stud… much to the dismay of my ex because i did cheat from time to time. I was just reveling in my new found sexual energy that i never allowed to build up.
Unfortunately, I ended up going back to my old ways, and in sync with that, our sex life decreased and eventually we broke up after 4 years. I was crushed… And instead of giving up this habit I just went head on into porn consumption, and with high speed internet, along with a bad coke habit… spiraled out of control with this. My sexual tastes started getting much more specific and “kinky”. Eventually, I got to the point where I get barely an erection even while masterbating… sex was totally out of the question unless i had some viagra or something… then i was a stud but it still didn’t feel right.
Well, 4 years later, here I am depressed, anti social, nothing going for me and living in moms basement. I have decided once in for all to kick this habit, I know it locks me in a negative state. Anytime I’ve ever given up this habit, good things start happening. It’s not a magic cure but I really feel that you give off a different vibe when your “Full” of your manly energies. I have gone the last 5 days without and immediately i can notice my interactions with girls, and guy to be much better. I a mmuch more relaxed, my voice is deeper, the girls seem to go out of their way to talk/flirt with me. I know they found me attractive before… I dress good, look great for my age despite being bald. I just feel a certain magic/sexual power… like i can seduce any woman and it’s great. I think most people that are saying this is bullshit are just so deluded… denial is very powerful.. few people have the power to look deep within their soul and question themselves. Ego is the destroyer of so many people… lose your ego. One of my best friend has potential to be a great musician, but he also is lacking in some areas and anytime i’ve tried to bring this up to him… he goes into denial or kinda does the in one ear, out the other thing. He will most likely not succeed on his own unless he has a major eye opening.
My personal belief is “they”, the powers that be, want a population of docile schmucks and I think that is why masturbation is encouraged so much. Your weird if you DON’T do it… I feel so much more able to take action ALREADY and it’s only been 5 days into my “rebooting” process. I recommend people check out the website- yourbrainonporn.com It is quite enlightening, and explains how this is truly a bad thing to indulge yourself in on a regular basis without religious dogma or eastern mysticism for you scientific/logical types.
Now, I don’t think there is anything wrong with the occasional tug job, IF you’re not getting laid. If you have sexual prospects you shouldn’t even consider it. It’s not a necessity, you aren’t going to get prostate cancer, that’s a bunch of bs. Wet dreams are natures way of “cleaning the pipes” if you’re not getting sex.
It’s crazy how we went from being a totally repressed puritanical society, to a completely depraved wanton society who’s motto is, “if it feels good, do it” Where is the balance??? I think in 10 20 years it’ll become mainstream knowledge that excessive wanking, especially to porn is detrimental to ones well being. Sure, porn has been around for a long time… but never until the last 10-15 years have we been exposed to so much porn. You don’t have to go to the seedy “book store” to get your fix, and even then you’re only able to get so much and it costs a lot…. now you don’t have to pay for it (if you know what your doing) and can be up to your eyeballs in it immediately. That is not natural.
Think about highly successful people that you admire or want to be like. Do you think 2pac sat around beating his meat for hours a day? George Clooney? Leo Messi? No, they most likely channeled that sexual energy into their respective crafts to further themselves along.
Hello guys.
I’ve been wondering about something…
After I start the Reboot ( already did countless times, even though I sometimes manage to hold for days without masturbation ), I find myself waking up in the morning and starting to ( without noticing it myself ) ”hump” the bed I just slept on, dropping some drops of sperm in the process. So, no matter how much or how little the amount of sperm is released, does it count as a relapse?
Does a single drop of sperm count as relapse ( in the context of what I said above ) or doesn’t it ? Because I don’t want to release whatever bit of testosterone I can gather humping the bed x)
Hope you understand my question. English is not my native language so I have certain difficulties expressing myself.
Good luck to all.
Going to relieve myself for the last time today and start rebooting. I’ll leave reports of how it went for those who want some more feedback ( even though the feedback in this forum is enough ).
Cheers!
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