It’s been four days of abstaining from masturbation and I feel like I’m going to explode. The first day is always the hardest, days two and three usually aren’t bad, but once you get to day four the buildup of sexual tension begins to bear down so much that the slightest breeze is cause enough for an erection. Why put myself through this torture? Simple, to understand the effects that male masturbation has on his ability to attract women.
It’s a self experiment, let me explain. There is an idea floating around that basically says that if a man abstains from ejaculating he will be more likely to pursue and attract females. There are a few different thoughts on why people might believe this, ranging from fluctuating testosterone levels to general horniness. Lets explore further, shall we.
Personal Masturbation Experiment
During the last year, I’ve been attempting to go on and off in my personal masturbation habits. Some weeks, I try to abstain from wanking and some weeks I treat my body like my own personal amusement park. Obviously, abstaining from masturbation is the more difficult of the two tasks, however, with a little will power I managed to pull off a week of no ejaculating here and there, enough to make some general observations about my behavior as it relates to the dating world.
The first noticeable observation when abstaining from masturbation was that I was definitely more horny. No big surprise there. However, I believe that having that feeling of pent up sexual tension helped me to approach and talk to more women, as well as be more sexual around them. For instance, as opposed to approaching and having a casual friendly conversation, I was likely to use more sexual innuendos and be more direct about my intentions.
The second big observation from abstinence was my level of motivation. Not just motivation to go out and meet women, but my motivation to do other productive things in life, like exercising or writing for example. This was the complete opposite of weeks where I masturbated on a frequent basis. I’d just sit around the house all day watching TV, surfing the web and…uhh masturbating.
Effects of Ejaculation on Testosterone and Sexual Activity
What is testosterone?
a potent androgenic hormone produced chiefly by the testes; responsible for the development of male secondary sex characteristics
Essentially, testosterone is what helps make a man a man. It’s responsible for developing muscle and overall body fitness, not an unusual trait in an alpha male. Also, it helps to charge the male libido and sex drive.
So what’s testosterone have to do with masturbation? Testosterone is produced in the testicles and when you ejaculate you are releasing or using up some of that testosterone. This is fine when you are having intercourse with your desired partner, that is the whole point after all, but not fine when a chronic masturbation habit is leaving you drained of testosterone and limiting you from your true sexual potential.
In 2003, there was a research study done on the testosterone levels in males during certain periods of abstaining from ejaculation. It found that there was a gradual increase in testosterone levels during the first five days but on days six and seven there was a huge spike, up to a 147% increase in testosterone on day seven. After day seven, testosterone levels returned to normal, thus indicating that seven days is the effective number of days to abstain from ejaculating in order to hit peak levels of testosterone.
In another paper published in the Scandinavian Journal of Psychology, a group of male rats was studied during post-ejaculation and sexual exhaustion phases. One of their findings was that, after 4 days, only 63% of the males were able to show sexual behavior while after 7 days all males were getting it on in a giant rodent orgy. Again, this indicating that seven days is the optimal time between male ejaculation periods.
From my personal experience, I’ve noticed that usually between days five and seven of abstinence, are also the days when I’m able to get more make-outs or bring women home, usually as a result of being more motivated to sexually escalate those interactions.
The Loaded Gun Hypothesis
If you’ve ever watched the movie, “Something About Mary”, you may remember the following infamous scene:
The Loaded Gun Hypothesis states that by masturbating before going out to meet women will leave you calm and relaxed as opposed to nervous. Supposedly, this calm and relaxed state will keep you from doing something stupid and hence aid in the attraction process.
In my opinion, this is the wrong way to look at this. You want to have a loaded gun! You are an alpha male, you are a hunter in search of your prey. The nervousness only comes from the stereotypical Ben Stiller character and not the extra baby batter. If anything, the pent up sexual demand seems like it would make you more confident and motivated in your female interactions.
The Seinfeld Abstinence Hypothesis
In one episode of Seinfeld, George quits having sex because his girlfriend has mono. This now lack of sex causes George to become motivated to learn and turns into a genius. The idea being that without the distraction of sex on a man’s brain, he’s able to focus his thoughts on other more productive pursuits.
I think this hypothesis only has it half right. I don’t agree that abstinence will relieve the distraction of sex, but will actually amplify it, at least in the short term. As someone who has gone for more than seven days without ejaculating, I know that it’s almost impossible not to think about sex. However, despite that sex will likely always be a distraction for any red blooded male, it doesn’t mean that there isn’t an underlying psychological self improvement motivation factor involved in abstinence. I’ll talk more about this next.
Effects of Ejaculation on Dopamine Levels
What is dopamine?
a monoamine neurotransmitter found in the brain and essential for the normal functioning of the central nervous system
Dopamine has many functions in the brain, including important roles in behavior and cognition, motor activity, motivation and reward, inhibition ofprolactin production, sleep, mood, attention, and learning.
Essentially dopamine, manufactured in the brain, has a whole bunch roles in how our nervous system works. It’s also particularly important in orgasms. When we ejaculate our brain releases a bunch of dopamine acting like a euphoric drug producing an orgasm. However, as the above definition states it also effects the function of other areas of the nervous system which are vital to our daily living like sleep, mood, learning, motivation etc.
Dopamine as stated above, is used by our bodies as a reward mechanism. For instance, when we eat something that tastes good, our brain rewards us by releasing a small amount of dopamine, thus helping to create and reinforce behavior which the body believes is good for you. The same is true of sex, as human beings we are hard wired to procreate. And the only way to procreate is to pursue sex with the opposite gender, which we will be rewarded by a huge release of dopamine (an orgasm) when successful.
It’s also important to note that when dopamine levels are low and depleted, it will have an adverse effect on other areas of the central nervous system which rely on dopamine to function properly. For example, in one study published in the American Journal of Psychology, it showed the effects of male volunteers who had their dopamine levels deliberately depleted over a 42 hour period of time. During that 42 hours, the normally healthy social males experienced negative symptoms like obsessive-compulsiveness, thought disorders, social anxiety and depression.
So, one could say that too much ejaculation, to the point of depleting your dopamine levels on a regular basis, is going to have an adverse effect on your daily lifestyle.
Savage Hypothesis of Behavioral Ejaculation Reinforcement
If a man is motivated and pursues the act of becoming an alpha male, he will attract desirable females. This eventually leads to sexual intercourse with those desirable females and is rewarded with orgasms. This reward reinforces the alpha male behavior that was needed to attract a desirable female in the first place, prompting the male to continue the traits that helped him become alpha, thus perpetuating the cycle and continuing the supply of desirable mates.
If a man is lazy, unmotivated and relies on masturbation as his main form of sexual activity, he is unnaturally creating a false reward for traits that are undesirable in potential female mates. This false reward tricks the body into thinking that it is pursuing alpha male qualities when in reality it is pursuing beta male qualities. This cycle also perpetuates itself by continually being satisfied with the act of masturbation rather than the pursuit of desirable females.
Conclusions on Male Masturbation
If you are still with me, you probably might think I am completely against male masturbation, but I’m not. For one, this is a very debatable topic and I’m sure many readers will offer up evidence supporting masturbation as perfectly natural and acceptable, and please by all means add to this conversation, as I am very much in pursuit of truth like any one else.
For now though, I’m sticking to my hypothesis that regular masturbation on a daily basis will have an adverse effect on my ability to attract women. So, I’m personally sticking to the “7 day cycle.” The concept is that I abstain from masturbating and if I haven’t had sexual intercourse within seven days, then I’m allowed to masturbate and relieve myself. This allows for the testosterone and sexual motivation to increase throughout the week and hopefully peak around the weekend when I’m more likely to be out on the prowl.
Has anyone else experimented or noticed any personal changes when abstaining from masturbation for a long period of time? Any other thoughts, opinions, criticisms, verbal lashings? Leave ‘em below in the comments. And if nothing else, please think of the kittens:)
Update May 1st, 2009 – I have written a follow-up to this post here: Misconceptions of Male Abstinence and Ejaculation Hypothesis
Update April 22nd, 2012 – Here’s a great Ted Talk by Gary Wilson who runs the very informative Your Brain on Porn blog. I highly recommend watching it as it gives a better overview of the problems with porn addiction better than I have.
{ 409 comments… read them below or add one }
Nice! But man, a whole week, seriously? Dude…
A friend of ours went to a spiritual retreat in India a year ago and was telling us about it… and he said there were no phones, no email, and no sex allowed. Then he turns to me and me and says… ” and no masturbation either!” Darn it. He and Jennifer both agree I’d get booted pretty fast.
I just want to add this… for all the guys masturbating without lubricant, do yourself a giant favor and get some lube. seriousl, you’ll be glad you did.
If you’re not sure what lubes are for or which to go with, check out our recent video on this: The Lube Review (What Everyone Ought to Know About Sexual Lubricants).
Have an awesome day!
– Dan
Masturbation is a natural thing yes. Just like, releasing stress through other activities, this is just as comparable. Although, I do agree with the fact that the more you masturbate, the more you become complacent.
That in turn will lead to being naturally less attractive. If you hold out, like Savage is saying, it will increase your motivation, and (reading this somewhere) will release more pheromones on your body when you go out and meet women – and women will instinctively pick this up.
I say the odds are in your favor when you masturbate less. But in the end, if it doesn’t work out for you that weekend or night, you should release yourself and try it again.
Eventually, it’ll become a cycle and it won’t hinder your general lifestyle. I’m hoping all of this made some sense…
A side note here… If you want to attract women, you have to believe down to your core that you’ve got something worth buying so to speak – you have to accept yourself and nurture – and radiate – a true inner confidence.
THAT is absolutely magnetic. Any good salesman will tell you that you can’t sell something you don’t believe in, at least not well.
And be aware of how you make people feel, that’s what they remember most about you, how they felt at the time. If they’re happy, laugh, and have a great time, guess who’s going on a second date.
– Dan
About 2 years ago I wasn’t getting laid. I had lost my virginity a year prior, so I had the taste, but couldnt close the deal in the new enviroment (college).
I went over 3 months, yes 3 months, without busting a nut (I had maybe 3 or 4 make outs during that time, nothing beyond that with women).
After the first week, I was more motivated to go out, and did so accordingly. After the first 3 weeks, motivation amped up even higher, including in the gym.
After about 5 weeks…well it was all downhill from there.
That motivation turned to eagerness, and in turn I became nervous and jerky (and walked around with a woody every time I saw a hot chick).
So ya, a short story I thought Id share! (note-began getting laid about 3 months after this little abstinence).
-Dream
Some boxers try to abstain from sex or masterbation in the months and weeks leading up to their fights. This increases testosterone and pisses them off b/c they aren’t getting any pussy.
Athletes have long tried to abstain from sexual activities before games perhaps because of the dopamine levels.
There was another episode of Seinfeld, or perhaps the same one, where Elaine was dating a musician. She witheld sex from him for a while, and when she finally gave in he started sucking it up on stage.
@ Dan,
Yea dude, 7 days is tough, but I think once you get used to it, it’s not soo bad. I don’t know what you have to worry about, don’t you have the lovely Jennifer to take care of your needs:)
@ Infinity,
I do think it’s a natural instinct to masturbate, but doing so on such a frequent basis, as in once or twice a day doesn’t seem natural to me especially if one is masturbating to porn or other such visuals that lets say a caveman wouldn’t have had access to.
@ Dream,
Wow, three months is crazy! It’s interesting to note that you said after 5 weeks it all went downhill. I suspect that there is definitely some sort of interval period where a guy just has to ejaculate.
@ Chuck,
Yes, this is another topic that has been widely debated specifically by top end athletes. I know that Mohamed Ali used to abstain from any kind of sex or masturbation for a month before any of his fights.
I believe the Seinfeld you are talking about was the same episode, but it was an unlicensed doctor who she withheld sex until he passed to doctor exam. As a result she had the opposite symptoms as George, becoming really stupid because the bags of trash were piling up in her head.
I can say that I do not have too much trouble not masterbating. There have been periods where I have gone longer that 7 days, mainly because my mind is focused on other things.
Although I do wonder if having an hot girlfriend makes me calmer and looking for the next day to unload.
This site has a number of articles that describe the so-called “neurochemical hangover” after orgasm, and the interplay between dopamine and prolactin, a hormone related to feelings of stress and irritability, and the likely culprit behind post-coital male laziness and female bitchiness.
These guys quote a hangover period of two weeks for recovering addicts, which I guess are guys who want to swear off orgasm forever… (?) This is apparently how long it takes for prolactin levels to return to normal. After that, the authors of the site recommend something called karezza, which seems to be a technique for delaying orgasm, wrapped in a bunch of new-age and Hindu spirituality jargon.
I’ve personally found that my most “on” nights in recent memory have occurred after between 7 and 10 days of will-powered abstinence. It’s a tough hill to climb, but the view from the top and the subsequent tumble down are pretty awesome.
Hey man,
Interesting theory, it may be that I have much higher levels of testosterone than most guys, but I’ve tried the abstain from jerking thing for about a month at a time and saw REALLY bad results similar to what Dream experienced, I was so nervous around girls, and horny it was EXTREMELY physically uncomfortable.
There’s also a decent amount of medical literature that suggest daily ejaculation protects the prostate from cancer.
My 2C.
Good to see some real research into something most guys just blindly follow.
Best,
S
If I am understanding this correctly you lose your built of testosterone when you ejaculate. With that being said, men don’t have to actually ejaculate to orgasm; you could masturbate without actually “blowing a load”.
I remembered back to the concept of being a male and stacking orgasms. A friend of mine not to long ago showed me a book that he had found about being better in bed (I can’t remember the title of the book to save my life). One of the sections was about increasing stamina and being able to have multiple orgasms. The basis of the technique is to be able to reach climax and then halt your bodily reaction by flexing your PC muscle.
The PC muscle is a thin strip of muscle in your falice. The muscle is used to push the flow of sperm through and out. A secondary use of this muscle (which the technique is derived from) is when you stop yourself from peeing. For instance, you have a great urge to pee but you aren’t by a bathroom and you flex your lower torso and you feel constriction on your penis. You are flexing you PC muscle and stopping the flow of urine. The entire technique is based off the flexing of the PC muscle. The process was you use is based off a scale of pleasure from 1-5 (now these stages are general feelings that you decide for yourself). I vaguely remember the steps but they were as follow:
1. Erection
2. Begining of sex/masturbation
3. Starting to feel pleasure.
4. Mid-range pleasure.
5. Climax
This technique takes practice to “perfect” so you are recommended to start at a lower level to strengthen your PC muscle. The recommended starting point of the technique is Stage 3. Once you achieve stage 3 you are supposed to flex your PC muscle. Now this can be achieved by either by flexing your muscle as you were to stop yourself from peeing or to firmly grasp for penis under the head and squeeze. If you do the latter of the two practices you will need to add enough pressure that you experience a receding feeling. After doing this you may be less erect and will need to work it back up. Now you repeat this process a few times and then move on and do it at stage 4 a few times. After you get a hang of slowing the flood flow and build up you procede to the final phase. You continue sex/masturbation until you are almost at the tip of climax and then repeat the step above. If done properly you will actually have a slight orgasm. You may excrete a small amount of semen, but you will not completely ejaculate. After this is done you can procede to have sex for theoretically as long as you want, because it will take a fair amount of work for your body to build up another ejaculation.
This technique given, I believe it would be possible to masturbate and not lose your testoterone because you aren’t fully ejaculating. If everytime you masturbated you did this you should retain your testoterone. If that is the case its a win-win situation, you can still masturbate have an orgasm and keep your manly chemicals.
Great article. What I think deserves kudos is the attention to personal, empirical observations. I’ll throw a few of mine own personal observations out there just to add to the discussion:
- After abstaining from 4-5 days, I’m definitely hornier and feel greater incentive to go out and meet girls
- Like someone else mentioned, I think I perform less well around girls when having abstained (Loaded Gun Theory) because I’m much more anxious. The lack of masturbation makes me want to go out, but I lose my social finesse; if I whack it before a first date, I’m MUCH calmer and things always go smoothly. (And I wait until Date #2 to physically assert myself with the girl anyway.)
— Although a lack of masturbation causes me to do worse around women when I’m out, a higher frequency of real sex causes me to do much better; there is an added element of confidence that is missing from the former and present with the latter
— To further my point, there must be a further physical difference between masturbation and real sex. My own observation is that after masturbation I feel tired and empty; after real sex I feel tired and emotionally very happy. Obviously some chemical is causing this difference
- Masturbation, esp daily, leaves me feel tired, washed out, and unmotivated. Though it’s fun at the moment, I lose both my productive momentum and my initiative to pursue other pastimes. I think, if I remember right, there was a chapter on this phenomenon in “Think and Grow Rich.” During periods of abstinence, I feel a drive and creativity that, when applied to a project or pursuit, leads to both a sense of accomplishment and real accomplishment
- Too much internet porn over time has actually become boring to me. There is so much pussy on the tube that I literally started getting bored looking at pretty, naked girls – this alarming fact is what ultimately led me to try to reduce my masturbation frequency
- Also alarming is that it seems over a long period of time, I sort of psychologically duped myself into pursuing less attractive girls in the real world because I knew I could see hot girls on the net
- After 5 or so days of abstaining, I noticed that sex became less important to me (seemingly following the 7 day graph above). After about 5 days, I felt almost asexual
Actually, the more I do it the more apt I’m am to be horny for more. When I haven’t been laid in a while, it’s not a big deal. But once I get it, gotta have more.
I don’t know if I’ve ever really done your experiment justice, but in my experience with masturbation, I’ve had very different results.
There were a couple of stretches in college where I had temporary long distance situations or I was on campus during a break when most other people weren’t where I was pretty much cooped up in my room all day by myself bored. As a result I had stretches of multiple days in a row where I would crank it literally 5-8 times a day. I found that i would actually become horny more easily after a point, like my testosterone levels were elevated to a sexually aroused state and never really went down, or maybe my body was depleting testosterone too quickly and as a result it started overproducing testosterone. I’ve had similar experiences when I have been in relationships and done like a weekend by ourselves etc. I suppose it could also be due to some kind of addiction biology. Just theories, I obviously wasn’t measuring test levels in the blood, but that was definitely my experience.
Fascinating stuff….TMI though
Whats your opinion on masturbating to porn?
Ive gone under the believe that it creates a mind attachment to the future and keeps you out of your body. So when you hit the field your body is in the future predicting sex and in the past guilty of masturbating all at the site of the beautiful woman(women) simultaneously. Get back to on that.
Plus ive noticed i stopped masturbating for months at a time and my body was insanely silly and powerful and i was so sexual id feel like a sexual chocolate strawberry while in class. But ay thats just me.
My experience goes according to the diagram of testosterone levels. Without realising it, after I got broadband internet, I developed a porn addiction and I would masturbate daily, or every other day. Once I realised it actually made me feel bad and “drained out” I decided to go on abstinence for as long as I could. The first days were like hell, but after 6-7 days, I stopped having the urge to masturbate and got more energetic with everyday activities.
What was surprising to me was that after the first peak, as the weeks went by, I never felt the strong sexual “urge” to masturbate nor was I really horny. I didn’t even have morning erections and that got me worried. Just before I hit the 2 months mark, I masturbated just to make sure I was still able to do it properly. And it went fine. From then on I kept for the most part a 1 per week schedule which seems to be working the best in terms of relieving me and letting me feel drained out.
I was talking to Ron Jeremy once and had a crazy conversation with him…Anyway, he told me at one point that Peter North would be celibate for an entire month before doing a scene and this is one of the main reasons he is able to do his “epic” money shots…Don’t know if I could ever go a month without sex or jerkin’ it though…Luckily I haven’t really had to do that
This was a fantastic read that I can sincerely relate to.
I have already attempted my own abstinence regiment before reading this, and can honestly say that I am a much more out going guy a few days after my last ejaculation. A man can really feel good about himself if he doesn’t masturbate. Of course, I’m comparing the progress that I have made to what I used to be; which was a chronic masturbating teen.
Ever since I stopped masturbating every day, everything in my life has improved. My confidence, my body, and my overall enjoyment of life has increased ten fold from what it used to be. I still masturbate occasionally, and will try your routine— “The Seven Day Cycle”.
I really liked your article, and will be checking in to see what else you write.
Great stuff DUDE!
I will try a report back..I remember after awhile i couldnt do it cause my parents house and psycologically drained that I wasnt thinking about it.my verbals and swagger was more calibrated with my interaction…women have radars on their fucking heads
I totally agree with the theories presented at the very top. I had notice some time ago the effects of masturbating and not masturbating, and true as it is on the fourth day it becomes really hard not to masturbate. All those testosteroens are building-up and it must be releases however I have notice in m own body the changes that occur while I abstain from masturbating. I become more active, I exercise more, I also concentrate more and emotionally I feel better although I do go up in flames if I see a hot girl walk by, nonetheless my mood and stamina increase during the days of abstinence.
And I most certainly agree that as my testosterones accumulate so those my desire to sexually interact with the female gender, instead of being neutral and talk about usual daily things I flirt much more and feel more sexually excited meaning my confidence rises and so does the urge to hunt for “prey” lol
Funny enough, when you masturbate your testosterone levels go down, but when you have sex, they dont. Theres a study on this, but I couldnt find it to link it here.
Actually, when you are having regular frequent sex, your testosterone goes up.
So how can the body tell the difference between ejaculating during intercourse or doing it to porn?
Germanico, it could be psychological. But then again there could be some mechanism that identifies two type of ejaculation. As I mentioned before, I feel more energetic and my test go up during abstinence but all of this had occured long before I had any knowledge of it, it was until recent that
I had discovered what many others experienced and knew. However in my personal experience having sex and ejaculating result in the same “drainage” only difference is that physical interaction is psychologically more rewarding.
In that “take the bullet out of the chamber” movie the guy was giving the protagonist BAD ADVICE because he was also after the same girl.
Yes, it is better to go out with a loaded gun.
And speak to women! Make approaches, accept social risks, escalate, and let her hold that gun. Let her start imagining firing that big loaded gun.
And do not eject without rejection.
Jerking off should be the embarrassing consolation prize that you give yourself after going out and making 100 approaches.
Really a week without masturbating? That’s easy. Longest I’ve been without masturbating was 8 weeks. Yes, 8 weeks! Why you ask? Just to see could I beat my old record of 6 weeks.
Listen up hunks! Act like a man and start developing self control. you know life without masturbation has much more interesting things to offer. Each and every person masturbates once in his lifetime. This takes place mostly due to peer pressure, stimulation and loss of self control. Discovering masturbation is completely normal and natural, but continuing or practicing it as a habit is totally abnormal and risky. We guys are always interested in girls! this is perfectly natural and cannot be abstained from. but listen up guys, only those boys are preferred by girls who abstain from masturbation. the consequences of masturbation are numerous and benefits are NONE!
i have to concur that after a couple of days of fighting the urge to jerk off, i am far more direct and willing to make sexual innuendo with the women I meet. I also, however, find myself more willing to eject when logistics and/or her feedback does not seem like SNL noise on my radar.
I have experience. Masturbating is very dangerous. I was masturbating for more than 20 years and i regret it. Now i have health problem ,headach,chronic fatigue,chronic bachach, flu,cough,problem witheyes, memory problems, impotence, …all kind of disorder.
In the beginning you can not notice it. in beginning(one year,two,three,four,five…) at end of the day ,you will regret.
modest
I keep experimenting with this idea and I find that the advantages of not masturbating outweigh masturbating even though occasionally you can be a little too high energy.
For me i want to know one thing .How to stop with this humiliating and bad habit of mastabating? I have mastubated for years , But i assure ,you come to know about the consequenses of the habit when it is too late
Now how to stop? How to stop?
claude
I have a feeling modest and claude are the same person…
Anyway great article dude I’m gonna try this cycle starting… tomorrow
Is there any difference if your GF jerks you off? I’m either screwing her or shes jerking me off or blowing me on a daily basis. Is the testosterone effect the same?
I’m a doctor and although I prefer not to provide such private information on a site such as this for better reasons that to do so still, it seems that its better to explain about this topic once and for all. Have you ever hear of the two sayings one by the church and the other by non veteran doctors that; age of consent for sexual … is 16 years of age for boy and girls and that, masturbation is good for people since blah blah since why its is not important when it is not important to do so at all. The thing is that, the church wants you not love people men and woman too much since if you did you actually is loving god less and this is it all what the Bible (A pointless book with better alternatives for it) is saying about this but christianity is a bad religion to start with. Secondly, if you did obey the age of consent law then the only way to although badly mimic the conditions where you have broken that law is to masturbate. Here is the point though, if you have had done so brocken that particular law then, you will today stand up as a winner living at the top (not lonely at the top since there are woman for you at the top for example) as a natural player who have had the proper one of the keys turned for a person to bring that great inner player inside almost all men which, depend only on how mensa you are.
This writing is an absolute gem. Everything I have experienced personally… I tried to abstain 8-9 days regularly. And I had (no kidding) a lot of indicators of interest from women. They do approach and talk to me, even though I do not approach them at all. About the end of the week, I sometimes feel like I can run 100 meters in 10 seconds, like a kung-fu fighther, a boxer or whatever… Too much tension sometimes brings loss of concentration. Beware though, if you already produce too much testosterone like me, younger than 30, when you abstain it peaks and some guys become hostile to you. No kidding. I am absolutely serious.
Forget about the church. It seems like you did not understand what is happening to me. Masturbating has created problems to my health. I started since i was 17 and today i am 40. The damage is really huge. And i regret why i learned from a friend this bad habit. It is not about the church but about my health. Some problems i face due to this very stupid habit:
a) chronic fatigue
b)headach
c)flou
d)cough
e)kidney problems
f)weak erection(caused twice to divorce with my partners)
g)Eyes problems
i) Memory problems and lack of concentration
q) infertility(when i was 17years i produced children with two of my gils friends but when i get maried at 28 could not .)
I talk to some doctors online who know the effects of masturbating. I have to spent regulary 50$ to buy herbal products to correct the problems i have created for years. But it can be possible only if i stop also masturbating ,a habit in which i have becam as addicted to. I know many other people who have the same problems like me .
kambe. Thanks
I love the part “you should have a loaded gun” that made me laugh so hard man, you have no idea! Good advice!!
McDonalds = Junk Food
Masturbation = Junk Sex
This is such a deep post on this topic.
Nobody really talks abou this and yet
it’s super important too.
I’ve jacked off every day since I was
10 or so.
I’ve been mulling this over for a while
now too. This gives me even more to
think about.
I agree that this is a topic worth exploring in relation to PUA. I have been experimenting with abstinence from orgasm and I have noticed personal benefits. Although I have experienced some of the nervousness mentioned after about a month, I have also noticed periods of clarity. It seems like a lot of guys trying this experiment experience this anxiety and it might have some explanations.
It could be the result of repression, which is never healthy. A possible solution would be to have another outlet like physical exercise, creative or mental endeavors, or close bonding with others. There is nothing new in this suggestion as many observers in past traditions point out this occurrence and the possible dangers of mismanaged sexual energy on the nervous system. However, it has also been the experience of other guys that have abstained to move through this discomfort.
I have been using this technique of abstaining from orgasm to help in my personal development and I have noticed an improvement in my emotional life. The dopamine cycle that accompanies orgasm is naturally addictive and thus states and input associated with it are particularly powerful. Having started to unravel this cycle, I have noticed that there is a difference in my mood depending on the circumstances surrounding the orgasm. The orgasm itself is associated with a dopamine spike, but over time and with frequent occurrence, there is more of a need to achieve the same dopamine rush. There is a building of tolerance. Naturally, the mind will grab dopamine spiking circumstances to compensate for the need for more dopamine. After years of doing this, a web of emotions, habits, and mental imagery can accompany orgasm and at this point, the orgasm is a different animal and depending on the severity, can cause hindrance on emotional health. When a person masturbates to porn, they are lighting up different pathways to achieve orgasm than they are while sleeping with a partner and the effects could be different. However, it is possible to masturbate without the dopamine-spiking rituals of mental fantasy (porn is a form of fantasy). This is considered healthy masturbation and is suggested by some psychologists involved in male empowerment. The idea of this technique is to free the mind of an internal compulsion that we have previously used to manage a deeper anxiety or unresolved issue. This anxiety that we experience while abstaining for over a month could possibly be the result of us actually coming into contact with this anxiety and we are not used to it, so it feels disturbing.
What does this have to do with PUA? Everything! As you know, its deep feelings of anxiety and shame that interfere with our success with women. Good PUA work is not mechanical techniques, but unraveling the outdated mental habits that prevent us from being our genuine attractive and relaxed selves.
Do the experiments for yourself and observe how you feel, that is the best way to tell.
My experience with practicing this has been more motivation for everything, more of a social life, better performance in school, better management of moods, I know Ive become more attractive to women because Ive been able to talk to them with greater ease. Ive broken out of my shell a lot more, Im more muscular than Ive ever been because Im motivated to change, and I carry myself a lot better. I was a worm about two years ago too. It feels like this has helped to put the fire under my ass and really get serious and clear about things.
My game is still a work in progress. I pick up PUA, have some limited success, and am driven back to do inner game because I encounter something uncomfortable that needs attention. The drive for reproduction is the most powerful force and motivator in organisms (even more than food), it can do a lot for us in our personal development if we learn to work with it and manage it well. I think our management of our own sexuality is a cornerstone in future lasting success with PUA, whether its for one night stands or eventual long term relationships.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brahmacharya
Excellent post bro !!!! Very informative !!
dude thanks im on 4 day of abstinence…
Where does sex come into this? Like what If I am abstaining from masturbation, and get laid on the 3rd or 4th day?
@Adam,
The point of the article was to abstain from masturbation so that you can have actual real sex. So, if you have sex after 3 or 4 days of abstinence then congratulations, you win!
If you are interested in increasing your testosterone levels-working out is a great way to go… Just hitting the gym a few times a week isn’t gonna turn you into a body builder but you will probably see a respectable increase in strength, stamina and energy levels. Also, if you are fat, that increases estrogene and lowers testosterone. So getting in shape and staying lean is the thing to do.
As far as masturbation, that is a really personal thing. If you are attempting “mastery over your cock” then that might be of some benefit… E.G.-I will not let the little head determine how I spend my time….looking at porn on the internet is a waste….etc.
However, another arguement can be made that rubbing one out can help one relax and get a better night’;s sleep, thus ensuring a more productive day.
Oh, and for premature ejaculators, rubbing one out before a date might be the best thing to ensure that things don’t end too quickly.
It’s not a one-size-fits-all for every guy.
i made myself a commitment.. if i have to ejaculate it means i dont have enough women and my routine is shit.
so i will not ejaculate and work on that…
hows that for motivation
I’ve never masturbated in my 18 years of life so this whole article did seem a little hard to relate to.
I ‘wet dream’ every few months or so I’d say, hard to tell but there aren’t many in a year. This has interested me greatly though, I’d love to help these findings in whatever way I can!
genial man
i completely agree with you.
Especially the trick reward opened my eyes.
i tell you – for me it s very hard to control it. pass 2 days it becomes a critical need. i presume it s just because i get bored and this is providing quick good feeling.
Now i m fighting against masturbation, putting out TV, VCR and PC from my home.
i want to lock my pc in my office not to have the possibility to take it after 2 days and do my stuff home..
It s amazing by the way how creative i can be after some days.
the drawback for me is that after 3/4 days i get on one hand strong desire but i don t want make effort to start with girls.
also more perverted sexuality come to my mind.
i get afraid and release all like a human bomb diffusing his load…
Well anyway i m happy to hear you and see that we re not alone..
THKS
Im currently trying the 7 day cycle as u stated in the article, im on my second week so far and have found to be more sociable, more motivated and surprisngly less eager to open up porn and jerk off, its like u break out off a destructive habit and u take control off your sex life. also found that after just coming back from leeds festival yesterday that despite not eating or drinking as well as i usually do water/ good food, I came back looking really good and feeling in a better place in life. Something about them 4 days seems to off made me actually stronger physically, maybe constant being on your feet dancing barging etc, and being out doors and not watching tele, pc screen etc seems to do wonders for general skin glow and a clear head. I drank plenty of alchohol whilst there and i feel drinking alcohol only seems to benifit me, note not to much all the time obviously bad 4 u, but the odd few cans here and there and odd night out getting smashed on double vodkas i tend to feel more manly if thats best to describe it. I also think that less masturbation doing the 7 day cycle will do the following:
Easier to put on weight, as it should slower your metabolism gradually, i always find after wanking regulary for 7 days i feel slim and weak.
easier to build strength at gym, and also feel stronger already only been 2 weeks, barely been gym, and randomly leeds festival seems to off made me more stocky :s
More energy
More motivated
Improved concentration levels, example just statrting to learn the guitar again been useless in past but tried today and actually made progress.
More confident, i tended to look at porn for long periods and jerk off once per day hence brain focused on porn and wanking all the time, seems make me less confident
more sociable
Mature in a better way
be better looking better skin glow, i reckon id be less hairy on cheast if hadnt masturbated so much up to now
overall i would recommend the 7 day as cycle as anything longer that i think it starts gradually been badder 4 u. Im gonna do the 7 day cyle for a few more weeks and hopefully know for certain if its doing anything.
Thanks=) I know that I have a problem and you have given me the courage to take a loaded gun to battle=) I shouldve known this all along
Cold showers in the morning help.. not only do they help to abtain from masterbating, but they also have a lot of benefits, like antiaging, no dried out skin as hot water does that, thicker hair. google benefits of cold shower.
I thought you were just talking bull
Then i really thought about my life. Since i had discovered masterbation, had i ever gone even 2-3 days at most. So i was able to 5 whole days
The first three days, a bit hornier, but little difference. Fourth day i became motivated, and like confident, and there was this strange manliness about me. Like i am not a huge guy, but it was different. I felt more terrotorial. I looked at every women sexually, and things that would get me anxious, i did things that scared me, and i was able to get throug. The 5th day was awesome! unfourtonately i couldnt sleep late 5th day, and got weak. I am starting again, i cant wait for the sixth and seventh day, if the 4th and 5th are any indications,
Something happens, like you unconciously become more attractive, your body language changes. You look at women lustfully and they respond to that! I guess i will find out what i would have been with more Testesterone. Your more motivated to go out and find sex. Ill blog about the sixth and seventh day, hopefully i will make it.
Thank you, i realize now that i keep eating rice at home, i will never find the stake
I also want to add this
I have thought about this, and come to the conclusion that masterbation is an unnatural act. Here is my logic.
When jerking off we are sending false signals to the rest of the brain and the body that we are the ones having sex and passing our seed on.
You will agree with me when i say that life has two purposes, Survive and procreate. The fact that we have evolved to the point where sex is such a big deal is unnatural. In the prehistoric times sex was routine. You had sex with your female equivalent. Parts of our brain, especially some parts are still in those times. So masterbation is a big lie to the brain. we are not procreating!
As to why the testerone levels decline in the days after, i thought about this too. In nature, maybe it means that if you didnt have sex for a week or two, then you had adopted a different role in life. Such as that of raising children, gatherer. Think about what people who abstain, especially in the army etc. for like a year. They lose all interest in it. I have read this many times. Soldiers report of having lost the urge to have sex.
In nature, true nature, if you didnt have sex for a week then that would be odd, since you have an erection every morning. Now nature didnt think that maybe you wouldnt want to impregnate a girl every time you had sex, but in nature all women would be pregnant year round. Thus one woman would produce one child every year.
The lives we live now have become a joke. For all these useless things, we have sacrificed the right to eat what we want, drink what we want, and have sex without having fear, shame, dates, all this garbage we have now.
Survive and procreate
Have we really evolved.
i am married since 20 years have kids as well. now i am 40. i consider myself very fit . but i am unable to get the habbit of masturbating now since i am typing this its been three days now. the reason is not very much enjoying sex with my spouse as she is very conservative .
and i am always feeling hot so i masturbate a lot and the problem i have face is prmature ejaculation. how to get rid of it and is it reall true that if u stop masturbating you really get women to get laid or how, need a good answer to my post .
Interesting post, i have masturbated only once a week for a few years now. To be honest it hasn’t made much of a difference in my life. What i have realized thought is that masturbation really is a HABIT it is not something that you HAVE TO DO.
Personally i have far better things to do than play with my dick.
Fact is, 2-4 ejaculations per week from sex or wanking heavily reduces the risk of prostate cancer.
Fact is, orgasms help you fall asleep quickly.
Solution = get 2-4 bangs per week, not masturbations. lol
“Cold showers in the morning help.. not only do they help to abtain from masterbating, but they also have a lot of benefits, like antiaging, no dried out skin as hot water does that, thicker hair. google benefits of cold shower.”
Good point.
Wow, I’ve always sort of had a suspicion that I may feel better after abstaining from masterbation for a while, but been skeptical about making any conclusions involving correlation of abstinence to the way I’ve felt during abstinence. After exerting quite a bit of effort to find some confirmation to my suspicions, google searches prompted very little but answers to ridiculous to seem worth my time.
First of all thank you for the article. The combination of cultural reference, surmises from personal experience, with a dash of science made it the most interesting read I’ve found so far, and after reading about the correlation of testosterone levels and abstinence, I’d like to share the experience that prompted me to once again search for this subject(which lead to me finding this article). I have an quite a bit of free time which I spend on the computer, and there are no less than two universities in my town. The combination of these two things makes it very rare for me to go for even a day without ejaculating.
It has been two days though, and similarly to how one can feel a sense of nostalgia triggered by a smell which forces them to recall some distant memory, I recently was taken aback by the realization that the way I felt during my recent abstinence reminded me so strongly of the feelings I had in middle school and early high school(in 22 now).
In your article, it seems a fantastic coincidence to my situation that you’ve included this correlation between testosterone levels and abstinence, because the day before my two day abstinence I began taking DHEA, a precursor to testosterone, as well as human growth hormones, epinephrine, and quite a few other neurotransmitters and hormones(And for those unfamiliar with biochemistry, ingestion of a precursor to a neurotransmitter or hormone generally results in an increase in the amount that exists in the body). On top of that coincidence, I had begun tanking tyrosine, a precursor to dopamine and epinephrine. I stopped taking the DHEA today, as frequent use of it at my age can be detrimental to liver and other biological functions. I will recreate the factors of my situation some time soon, and if the same result takes place, I think I will have actually found for myself a very significant modification to my routine, as far as making myself happy. I feel fucking amazing. If anyone has ever masterbated at a specific frequency to maximize chemical well being, please email me with the results you seem to find, especially if you’ve done so in conjunction with the use of DHEA.
Very interesting article.
High testosterone level is also beneficial in building muscle mass and burning fat, so sports in general.
Trying to “achieve” the one week mark will be an interesting observation exercise (or rather non-exercise).
Neuromonger,
You seem to have a better grasp of how all the hormones work along with the other biochemistry knowledge. Your experiments in using DHEA is pretty interesting and will be curious to see if you can replicate your results. May I ask what you’re majoring in? I presume it’s something having to do with biochemistry?
I’m glad to read that you enjoyed my input. I actually still have another semester left of basics, and my major will probably flop back and forth between many things(One of my parents teaches at the university, which grants me a large scholarship by default, so I can afford a lot of experimentation).
I will probably end up moving more towards information technology, though there are avenues to merge that with neurology. It’s actually possible to replace a hippocampus now with something that is kind of like a hard drive, for people who have conditions comparable to what is depicting in in the movie “Memento”, and there has actually been a toy released this year, which is the first attempt to use a brain to computer interface device to replace controllers for gaming. One company that makes these is emotiv systems, and hackers work pretty diligently to make open source versions of any software that they make, so I would deffinately say that information technology could lead into neurology by the time I would have a degree.
While I do have some credit hours dedicated to nutrition and pharmacy, most of my knowledge of biochemistry comes from reading about something called the “hedonistic imperative”, which is sort of the drug-related, more realistic side of Transhumanism(but I can all ready see I’m getting too off-topic to explain those things here), and having lived in a town with two universities, I’ve had my fair share of dabble in Psychonautics, which involved just as much reading as recreational drug use.
One thing that I’d like to conclude with(because I would feel a bit guilty if I didn’t), after realizing it should have been in my article, for anyone who caught interest in DHEA, internet searches about it will expose you to many readings about how amazing DHEA is for your health. Most of these sources neglect to mention that these health benefits are exclusively correlated to DHEA use in old people, because it causes their growth hormone to be at levels similar to what they had when they were young. If your all ready young, regular use of DHEA in high doses can have similar effects as steroids, including the possibility of causing liver failure.
I have been going the once a week route now for a few weeks and have noticed increased energy, drive and confidence. It definitely helps me creatively when playing my guitar and helps me socially when talking to people in general. I did try going 30 days the longest, but was pretty stressed out even though I did feel very sharp mentally. Too compensate you need to meditate and exercise to relieve stress for the days you don’t masturbate and I’ve been doing this and it has helped. I wonder though if it is possible to quit completely and rely on wet dreams though…
The interesting thing is, whenever I come back from the gym, even though I worked out a sweat and should be exhausted, I feel a strong sexual urge, but no surprise considering how the testosterone has built up. Usually I like to work-out before I head-out.
I once went on a trip out east with a bunch of friends, one of them being a girl I really liked but she had absolutely no interest in me. Since we were so busy traveling and sightseeing, I had no time to masturbate for the entire week . Low and behold, throughout the week her and I grew closer and closer, to the point of almost spending the night together on the final night (day 7). However, one of the other women became jealous and kept purposely (and literally) getting in the way, so it never happened. There was a fair mix of guys and girls on the trip (10 all together), and I’m sure the other guys probably continued to masturbate regularly. So it is in my opinion that it helped make me the alpha. It was an odd experience, I honestly think it had much to do with the spike in testosterone by day 6 and 7 (I definitely felt different). But the time we returned, and regular sex (and masturbation) continued in normal life with my actual girlfriend (who I was having problems with at the time, because I liked the other girl), that really deep connection I felt with her (and from the jealous girl) has totally seized.
I think masturbation is a good think when you’re not depending only on it. It releases the stress and whatever problems you might thing you have – they are all in your head.
Due to over masturbation. Once a day for 10 years, I was left with soft erections and had a very hard time getting it up with the hottest of woman.
Western medicine did not have a solution except for take more of these pills or those pills and see if it works.
Eastern medicine which has developed over thousands of years looks at a holistic approach. I eventually came across some forum boards about sexual exhaustion.
Its true. Sexual exhaustion (The lack of essential male essence. Dopamine, Testosterone and etc) will occur in your life if you masturbate too much for too long. Once a week is probably fine, but every day is over kill.
After 10 days you will level out and your urge to find the woman of your dreams starts happening. You will start to feel confident, cool, calm and collected.
I have been with some very beautiful woman all due to my abstinence and only jerking it every so ooften. Its not only because I am horny and they realize it. It is because I have more overall energy, spiritually, mentally and physically.
Its hard abstaining from sexual thoughts when you live in a world where sex is marketed at all times. One of the biggest problems in the western world is the lack of meditation or clearing of the mind. We live for decades thinking, thinking and thinking. Primarily selfish thoughts. The moment we learn to protect our essence is the moment we find a peace of mind.
Thats my own personal opinion, most will disagree. Ask your self, why is it that our American culture has so many prostate and erection issues? Why don’t we see these issues in third world countries were men are more focused on surviving and not thinking about sex or masturbating often.
If you can go 7 days without blowing a load and then have sex, and NOT finish in less than 5 minutes I am jealous.
There is definitely a negative correlation between the number of days I go without and my endurance in bed, which forces me to “clean the pipes” before I might get some.
Please DON’T say that masturbation is healthy, this is all crap, take it form a 9 years addict to masturbation it’s terrible, it destroys you, you disrespect your self and you’ll end up a lonely bastard watching porn and having no relationships at all.
Sorry for the long comment, but I stumbled on this website and had to chime in on the discussion.
I’ve definitely noticed serious shifts, in both directions, with changes in my masturbation cycle.
Until about two years ago, I used to have complete dominion over my ejaculation. I could bang a girl for as long as I needed/wanted to and could basically cum on command. I could literally bang a girl for forty minutes or 90 seconds, hard-fucking or sweet-love–up to me. I had a couple of girls credibly give me the “best ever” prize. I masturbated once in a great while, since I had a steady rotation of prospects to service the engine or a girlfriend that I could call over to fuck when needed.
Then a strange thing happened. I got a “serious” girlfriend and made the mistake of moving in with her. The problem is that this girl had a low drive and didn’t enjoy actual intercourse as much as previous chicks. Sometimes, after fucking her for 5 or 6 minutes, she’d basically ask me to wrap it up. A lot of the time she wasn’t even interested. I started having LESS actual sex and jerking it to porn a lot more. A lot. To make matters worse, our sex wasn’t that good, so I’d find myself jerking it right AFTER having sex with her.
That wreaked habit on my control. I started cumming in a minute or two, even when I didn’t want to. Then, when she started to actually enjoy fuckin’, I couldn’t last long enough. She basically created the problem, but now it was MY problem. I tried the kegel bullshit and trying to jerk it off slowly, but none of that worked.
So I decided to go cold turkey. No mo’ masturbation. I figured that if I couldn’t get laid at home, the drive would get me laid elsewhere. So far (and it’s been a month), I’m finding a lot of the same results guys have reported, with some twists:
1. Overall feeling:
I’m aiming for the seven-day cycle, but I find there’s a consistent arc, depending on the day. Day 1 is whatever. Days 2, 3, 4 are the best. I feel manly, strong, and motivated to exercise. Great concentration. Smooth in my approaches. Days 5 and 6 start getting difficult. I spend more time distracted by sex and plotting my moves. My glaring at chicks starts getting creepy and TOO lustful. But this may change with more practice.
2. Approaches:
I never had a problem with approaches, but I found myself getting too cutesy and “clownish”–focused on entertaining, rather than on an actual goal. Now I exude a masculine sexuality when I transact with girls, with the same amount of charm, and they respond differently. I went to a social dance last week (on Day 3) and I was fondling and touching and laughing with a group of three girls. I had the energy and drive to keep all those balls in the air. My target was all over me, despite learning later on that she had a boyfriend at home.
3. Lasting power:
This is a work in progress, but with some measurable results. I’m finding that if I get some action on days 3 or 4, I can already control things a lot more and last longer. By days 5 and 6, I’m so pent-up that I still cum rather quickly, but find that I recover a lot faster than before. Whereas before I needed a whole day to “reload,” I could go again in an hour.
Anyone have any thoughts on the lasting-power aspects of the 7-day cycle and these other issues?
So, I’m getting my life together. Been going to the gym. Bout to go out more and more. I used to do it many times a day some where around 5 times on a good day.
I’m on day 2 and this is torture! I think I might have been someone who used it as a stress and anxiety reducer but damn I’m sorta going out of my mind knowing that its gonna be quite sometime before I can do it.
I suppose thats the whole point right? To increase the drive to actually find women?
How can I get through this? and is it really worth it?
Great site btw.
I’ve tried to figure this out for some time, and I’m thankful you put this thoughtful post here. Actually sometimes watching some good porn gets me all horny and motivated to go out. Especially when I had a busy week at work and no time for social interactions. But I think it is as with the rest of pickup skills training – the field is better than being alone at home!
Prelude: Around New Years day I decided instead of making a bunch of resolutions which would eventually be broken and forgot about I would focus on one idea and experiment that I felt would be both a mental and spiritual challenge. I would remain abstinent for 40 days. Along this ambitious journey I will document and explain any mental and physical transformations that occur during this time. The inspirational voice behind this act has been my own. I feel that my extreme and overwhelming attraction to women in the physical has grown to impair both my creative energy and interactions with many women in general. My goal is not to rid my sex drive or amount of physical attraction to women but instead to channel that energy into music and physical health and well being. I have decided to use this same energy and direct it towards my creative process and developing a clearer mind and healthier body. Because I stay active with stretching, Pilates and weight training to begin with the biggest challenge obviously will be to remain abstinent. In order to assure this experiment is not interrupted I have deleted the numbers of females that I was active with or could potentially be active with. Yarch to the masses…
Day 1- Feeling fine. Nothing was truly difficult today at all worked on some music and excited for the album to come out!
Day 2- Woke up pretty pissed off…not sexual frustration but mainly because I realize I can’t turn back now. Went to the gym and worked on music as usual did 1 hour of gyro tonics and meditation.
Day 3- Felt very strong in the gym however after my workout i felt slightly dull. I am extremely hydrated and have been eating well but I feel a bit groggy. Could be from anything though..
Day 4- Had very intense dreams sleeping last night. One dream was being on stage with baba and soundcheck taking long..this delayed our show an hour and the crowd was restless and I jumped in and crowd surfed. The whole audience was excited..and as i was pushed back on stage I saw the face of a girl (i will not name) that i met at a RISD party weeks before( and yes would like to have sex with this girl). Woke up went about my business worked on music was kind of stumped but ended up getting it together and making a very good altered version of a song. Sent it to the label they loved it.
Day 5- Woke up extremely aggressive but relieved for being able to control myself for day five. Went to the gym felt surprisingly weak but fought through it. Came home helped around the house worked on music, then filmed the u-stream webisode with TED. Came home and went to bed.
Day 6- No morning wood lol…that’s about all i can say for this day
Day 7- Borderline Numb…basically my sex drive is all mental but thinking about certain women doesn’t necessarily make me physically tempted to engage in sex and i refuse to resort to pornography or whacking it.
Day 8- Woke up feeling proud of myself for making 8 days. Went to the gym had an amazing workout. Excited to go to work on a visual for a song off the album. Got some reviews back from blow up magazine italy. Was crazy to see an article written in Italian about my group. What set me off though was some bad press by Resident Advisor. For whatever reason while reading the article I became extremely irate. Usually this is not in my nature but I felt abnormally aggressive for about fifteen minutes. I then laughed it off and realized i may be going through some sort of hormonal changes. I’m not a scientist but I definitely feel different lol.
Day 9- Felt Amazing all day. High energy and feelings of ambition.
Day 10- Travelled to work on the music video. Day went great felt amazing and even more energetic from being around good people.
Day 11- Shot the video all day. Excited to have the crew work so well together and very happy with the footage we got. After shot the scene and hung out I was very excited to possibly party and see some women. One woman in particular did not show up and for some reason i was slightly bothered by it. Out of nowhere i started feeling extreme feelings of curiosity and attraction towards this particular girl and she wasn’t even there.LOl my minds playing tricks on me and im not even drunk…Then I realize that it’s day 11 and i think my testosterone is significantly high today
Day 12- Got back to nyc to kick it with the A&R then went home to nj. I picked up food for my family and was not given the proper amount of money. I put the bill on my credit card and came home and realized i could have paid half with cash and half on my card. My mother told my sisters what i did and i grew extremely irate. I never usually let things like that upset me. For 20 minutes i felt very upset and depressed. I then laughed at myself and then worked on some music and felt calm. I can honestly say that changes have been felt and it has been 12 days. I am very conscious of placebo but i definitely feel like the past three days have had the biggest impact on my emotions.
Day 13- Ran some errands in NYC …went to soho and as I like to put it the SWAN capital of the world..i will explain SWAN later…I literally found something attractive about every single woman i walked past.. I was able to hold eye contact and smile at any woman but then I felt creepy and chilled out. Things seemed more vivid to me..the skin tone, clarity, bone structure and pheromones of every woman were pulsating all around me. I wouldn’t say I feel straight up horny but instead i feel spiritually inclined with the presence of women as creatures that put life into the world. It was one of the most amazing and bizarre days since boarding the ship.YARCH!
Day 14- I am literally convinced I can give any woman the best sex of her life at this point. It’s been two weeks I feel pure and more in charge of my self and my actions. I truly feel like a full being and have been inspired greatly to write songs for the next album.
Day 15- Writing a bunch of new songs. I feel great I think that the biggest challenge was the first ten days. I now feel balanced no feelings of anxiety or depression and extremely creative. Although I have been working on music every day post the first day of abstaining i have felt a spike in creativity after the first week. I don’t think it is placebo because crazy ideas have came to me and i’ve not been stumped at all. The nicolas Jaar album has inspired me to go even more left. I think the feelings of loneliness have gone away after the first seven to ten days..I now feel more comfortable in this state then reverting back. I think the main reason im not tweaking and eager to go meet new women other than this snow storm is that im in a creative zone musically. We will see if this remains, but it feels good so far. Yarch on!
hi,
i know this post is kind of old now, but i couldn’t google-out an answer to my question:
if my body is used and has formed with low testosterone levels (many years of playing with my pal…) , so will this once_a_week T level get me to my ACTUAL, genetically determined, physical appearance? I mean all the secondary sexual dimorphism features.
Cuz as a mid-twenties guy i’d really like to look more masculine… Or even have bigger “package”, and for god’s sake- a non-patchy growing beard!! =]
Can’t wait for replies!
@Pappy Mason,
Wow, great recap of your abstinence experiment! If only more guys would simply give it shot like you and see the results for themselves rather than going into endless speculation and denial.
@another_follower,
I’m not exactly sure what your saying, but it seems like you are implying that while in your mid twenties you don’t believe that you have fully developed your genetically pre-determined masculine features because of excessive masturbation? If that is what you are implying, then I think you might be stretching, considering that between puberty and the height of your development at around 18-19 years old, your body is constantly producing Testosterone and replenishing as to get your body to it’s desired developed state even if you are masturbating a lot. In fact, if there was ever a time in a guys life where my 7 day hypothesis doesn’t apply it’s during the late teens to early twenties, simply because the replenishment cycle of testosterone is much quicker than someone older. So, in my opinion, you’ve probably already peaked in terms of growth development, however that doesn’t mean that abstaining won’t help you, it does still increase masculine traits but in a more subtle way such as deeper voice, more release of attractive pheromones, confidence, motivation and general well-being.
Hopefully that made sense. If not, stay tuned, as I’ll be delving deeper into my own personal research on this topic.
ahh darn it =] well at least i get more aggressive and get into mindset “sex sex sex sex other_stuff sex sex sex sex…” =]
can’t wait for that new topic You mentioned, hopefully i won’t miss it.
this whole blog is awesome, Matt!
Hey guys, I’m 20 years old, have been masturbating since I was 11 pretty much every day so I think I’ve also been addicted for the past 9 years and I suspect this could be a contribution to my low levels of motivation, energy, confidence, etc.
However I do want to try this theory because I’ve also had suspicions that it may work.
But that’s the thing, if I’ve been addicted to masturbation, am I doomed for the rest of my life or can this experiment really restore my testosterone levels and my penis back to good form?
Thanks!
Well guys I’ve tried this and all I can say is that it’s changed my life!
All of a sudden I’m a babe magnet, the girls all pay me way more attention than they ever did before (I have two dates in a week with girls at work), my energy levels have gone through the roof, I can concentrate more on the goals in my life / including work…… wow just wow… sure it was hard for the first few days…
Limit the masturabtion to maybe just once a week like stated, and if you do need to relieve yourself don’t masturbate to porn or you may slip back into the cycle.
I’m on my 8th day no and still going strong… not sure if I should even masturbate now or wait longer??
DUMP the porn boys!!
Masturbation is very dangerous. I have experience of 25 years. The science has never found the danger of this vice but with experience i came to notice that really masturbating is dangerous to the body. Some people will tell you that it is just a myth . yOU COME TO REALISE the danger after mmany years after the body has become sick and very weak.some symptoms due to masturbation:
dry month
1)blurry vision and a lof pain on eyes.
2)CHRONIC FATIGUES up to the extend of failing take your shower using your hand.you have the feeling that your own hands are very havy for you.
3) Constipation. You do not have good digestion.
4) Very weak erection and your sperm can be leaking.
5)Chronic headack
6) Very low immune system like in a HIV+ person.
7)Feeeling of burning even when it is very cold
9) thining of the hair and hair loss
10) groomed faceand less attraction to women…
When you stop masturbating for several weeks some of the symptoms disappear.
Kambe
@Kambe,
I think you went a little overboard here and don’t believe masturbation will cause that amount of side effects you are claiming. Granted, I do believe that excessive masturbation causes decreases in certain male hormones and can have effects on libido and mental state, but you go to far with your claims with little evidence to back them up, whether anecdotal or otherwise.
Here’s a link to to a lengthy list of people’s experiences quitting porn and masturbation for as much as several months. It’s quite a compelling read.
http://www.reuniting.info/download/pdf/0.BENEFITS.pdf
Symptoms i described last time will be experienced only when:
1) you have over masturbated
2) you have overmasturbated for longtime.
In the beginning when one starts masturbating it seems to be good as i also thought .
Some doctors and cultures(westerners especially) encouge this bad practice. But with time you come to realise that the body has been used in a irreparable manner because of so called experts who claim that masturbating is good.
After you have over masturbated for a long period you will notice two major health problems which i describe as first symtoms:
1) Excessive fatigue.
2) Very weack erection
N.B: What do i describe as over masturbation? Do you know that some people can masturbate up to more than 15 time in a single day? personnaly i went throught this experience and some of my collegues .In this case you feel like the kidneys are going to burst and with time the brain will be affected(difficulty of cocentration) and many more health complication.
The effect of over masturbation will not only affect your health but also your social life will suffer with time.
Some of you said that i did not support this with evidence.
You should know that i came to this conclusion after i have personnaly experienced it for years and after many other youth have complained of similar symptoms. But i did also research for many yearsin this field.
Kambe
I am 14 years old almost 15 i looked this up because i finally realized masterbaiting was not the answer. I have masterbaited since i was 11 everyday till i realized it was not okay anymore(no joke 4 years masterbaiting everyday, only one time per day) and ever since i quit i have noticed major changes in my attitude towards women. I can aproach them way better and I litterly know everything to say to them but i only did it for a week… Then i couldnt handle it and busted a load. I made it around 6 days longest i have ever done in 4 years. But on Monday (2 days after i busted) i noticed i was not as good at talking to women. But by the middle of the week i was back on top of my game.. In conclusion i think that the 7 day cycle is possibly the way to go!
Yes you have to watch that, I waited 8 days before busting and then I hit the floor then next day.. I was all over the place emotionally. So when you bust you want it to be on a quiet day, so bust Sat night and then recover sunday maybe…
Great Article!
One of the things I noticed was that I had more energy for working out and I was more productive (overall) if I delayed from doing it. If I proceeded to do it daily, it made me lethargic all week.
I’m actually going to put this to the test and go with the seven day method!
I like watching my boyfriend jerking off but you are right if I want a really good hard fuck I like him to stop wanking for a few days so that when I see him a the weekends he has a massive hardon the minute we touch his erections are much harder and he can go at it for much longer before he does ejaculate he cums harder and faster and his cum is much more potent and seems thicker and more mobile and I enjoy sex much more with him and love the idea that he has saved his cum for me for the whole week to give me and deep hard fuck and lots of hot creamy spunk.
Firstly I’m gonna thank you for such a brilliant article. Indeed it helped me because I abstained from masturbation for like 4-5 days and i must admit, it feels great. Before i was like an uncontrollable psycho and there was this intense urge of relieving myself and this interfered in my personal life. But now this is no longer the case and talking to girls is much more easier. Such articles should be reinforced by giving steps and advice. Again thanks a lot!!
I started masturbating 10 years back when I was 15 (with varying frequencies , from every day to once a week etc), and dint think much about it til now when I felt that it was holding me back from getting it on with women .. things were different when I was young and would constantly approach girls and got a lot of action besides masturbation, but feel now my sex drive has reduced and wanking off takes care of my sexual needs, hence the reduced urge to go and flirt with women .. so I decided to stop masturbating for a while and see what happens, its been 9 days now and i dont have any urge to do it whatsover ..
These are my observations :
First few days, I felt like I have more energy and time to do things .. but what was dramatic was the change in reaction of women around me .. i used to get stares before as well, but it has increased (some sort of hidden force i guess) .. i talk to a lot more random women now, and they seem overtly giggly and suggestive .. I am more aggressive in talking to them, and they seem to like it ..
However, there is a downfall to this .. during a presentation that I had to give (on the 8 th day of abstaining) , i was over excited and could not control my voice (usually quite confident with these sort of things) I was really aggressive in defending my ideas when someone asked questions .. I guess it has to do with all the hormones that are stored up due to abstinence.. maybe next time i wil wank off before such a thing, but otherwise it feels great socially .. kind of reminds me of my childhood days when i wanted to make more and more friends .. and women they seem so much more beautiful now , and I want them more and more
its like women just know you are saving up your ‘love’ for someone like them
fuck porn .. that shit kills your soul !
This is so true. I always thought it, good to see facts backing it up. My rule is that if you have to do it, do it before you get 7+ hours of solid sleep.
It’s been like 4 days since I’ve been abstaining and I feel much more confident, masculine and invigorated.
abstaining from masturbation of course, I feel like fucking every woman I’m attracted to right there on the spot. lol
Hey Matt,
Does having sex everyday have the same negative effects? Or are there positive effects that outweigh the negatives.
Mike
According to the experiences masturbating and doing sex regulary are not the same. Masturbating is more damaging than doing real sex with a partner of the opposite sex.
People say that mastabating is good and natural and those who oppose it’s benefits are not informed or do not know any thing about it.
The truth is that mastabating is very dangerous. When you masterbate you are killing your own body. The body(the brain) will realise that you have cheated. And consequenses are really unbearable. And this do not happen in a single day. It take time before you notice that you have killed your body by overmastubating.
Overmastubating will affect your life in all aspects of life( It will affect your health, social life..)
kamb
Wow. Ok first things first. About 10 years ago for the first time ever after about 12 years of jerking of, I decided to try and stop. I just felt it might be a good thing to do at the time because I was cleaning up areas of my life and thought I’ll confront this problem also. Anyway I managed 2 weeks and one thing I noticed is when I did get an erection, it was much bigger than normal. Lasted 2 weeks, then one night I had the window open in my flat and I heard the couple next door having sex. I was pissed of because this was torture. But had to give in and rubbed one out. Can’t remember much of how I felt for that 2 weeks now except for the irony of that incident. Seemed like a test from god. I’ve only ever heard someone having sex 3 tines in the many years I’ve been living there. Anyway back to present day. I decided to try again. Funny because I had alot of ideas that it would help in areas like you’ve all mentioned. Only on day 2 now but thought I’d google it and found this site. I’m so glad to gave alot of ideas confirmed. Had a realisation reading the last comment. I wonder if it’s natures way of keeping you with the girl your with. So that other women won’t be as interested. Want to write more but I
at work typing on my iPhone. I’ll keep you updated. Only day two. But as I’m a bit of a loner I’m very interested to see what happens.
I was referring to mikes post. Second last one btw
- Check out what ayurveda, taoism says about the topic.
ie., preserving and converting it (see multi-orgasmic man)
- 100 drops of blood go to make 1 drop of semen
- One can masturbate & not come. Difficult but doable through practice.
Dear clinton
am very happy that you have really brought all what i was
advising on masturbation. Masturbation has a very bad side effects and serious consequenses .However you suggested that one should seek help from homeotherapeth.You did not provide some of their adress in order to find them.
Kambe
I found that if I’m abstaining from masturbation I’ve got more energy, my voice is deeper, I’m more confident and sooo horny. Now, after 5 days non masturbating, I had very erotic dreams, and usual I don’t have them at all.
My energy levels are higher, to the point I have problem with falling asleep. But it’s only about week of such high, then it’s going to be normal.
Regarding sexual energy, build up, relaxation, etc, you might be interested in this;
http://www.reuniting.info/wisdom/is_sex_a_private_matter
Just an excerpt, Over 2000 years ago, Daoist Master Laozi is said to have advised that a person’s approach to sex is a sign of his level of spiritual evolution.1 For those who aspire to the higher realms of living, there is “angelic dual cultivation,” which allows every portion of the body, mind and spirit to meet its yearning for the integration of yin and yang.
Modern neuroscience is beginning to confirm Laozi’s claim that ordinary sex (with orgasm) disorders the subtle energies. Deep in a primitive part of the brain known as “the reward circuitry,” orgasm equates with a mighty surge of a neurochemical called dopamine. It’s the “I’ve got to have it” neurochemical that urges us to do things that furthered our ancestors’ material plane survival, and above all, pass on genes.
It makes us feel like Superman or Wonder Woman when it surges. Indeed a Dutch scientist reported that brain scans of people having orgasm resemble those of people shooting heroin.2
However, just like a drug high, it does not lead to lasting feelings of satisfaction. Dopamine drops immediately after orgasm, and other neurochemical shifts adversely affect dopamine levels for days.3
In some lovers this shift accounts for the “roll over and snore” phenomenon, often followed by days of emotional detachment. However, the neurochemical changes may show up as neediness, irritability, mood swings, feelings of scarcity and defensiveness, harsh judgments, hyper-activity, a “need for space,” cravings for (addictive) substances (or more orgasms) that temporarily raise dopamine in the reward circuitry, etc.
….
More here;
http://www.reuniting.info/wisdom/is_sex_a_private_matter
Maaaan, I always felt that something was wrong with me since I started masturbating heavily about 6,7 years ago. Although I had two girlfriend for the past full 5 years I still retained the habit, I felt lazy all the time. However, I rember a 6 month period in which I had a fight with my girlfriend so we separated, and in that 6 months I didnt masturbate that much….wow now that made me energetic more sociable and more productive….. funny how it all comes together if you think about it…
I’m starting the 7 day cycle abouuuuut: NOW!
I didn’t read all the comments, i will get around to that, but are there any other studies about when you peak? I know from experience (training 4-7 hrs a day before state in high school) where i had abstained from masturbation for a whole season 4-6+ months and i peaked for like 3 days with roid rage.. im very even tempered but i never experienced anything like this. I was literally GOD for like 3 or 4 days.
Unfortunately it went away 2 days before state. What i mean by roid rage is 1) I was literally invincible. I could feel like power radiating around my body like an invisible shield and was capable of killing anything with my bare hands and 2) I had a terrible temper for like 2 days. I snapped at people for taking too long and little annoyances. Eventually I apologized but I was excessively aggressive and mean for a few days.
Has anybody heard of this? It seems to be the same as the Raging Bull theory where you peak in aggressiveness however this was a 4-6ish month abstinence so i have no idea how to time it.
It may not take that 4-6 months, I only started training more than 5 hrs a day for about a month before state so it may be possible to hit this peak for a 2-4 day window after abstaining for 1 month and training 6+ hrs a day
It’s hard ( no pun intended) for me to abstain from jacking off. I have figured out that I can man up and deal with my horny feelings or wimp out and jack off. People notice when I’m not masturbating. I take that extra effort to look attractive to girls. I of course don’t tell others of what I am doing but it makes me feel good to be in control of my desires. The seven day rule workss!
Hello matt, there is a question i’d like to ask. As im at the 6th day of abstaining ,i start feeling more confident on approaching women, but I think I’m coming across a problem. If I actually manage to get laid, wont I have a premature ejaculation because I didnt masturbate for that long?
Is it okay to masturbate but not go to climax? ie no fluid coming out? Do you still think you’d get the same effects as giving up masturbation completely? Would it be better or worse? What about other factors like time? I mean there would have to be a difference between masturbating for 2 minutes and not cumming compared to 30 minutes and not cumming?
Also, there seems to be some worry about not orgasming over a long period of time. Is there any worries about this? I’m kind of guessing a wet dream would take care of this if one was going without sex and masturbation. That reminds me does anybody notice any energy/spirit effects after having a wet dream? I can’t remember my energy levels after having one when I was younger.
Finally, it seems like common sense that biology would prefer us procreating rather than masterbating. However, I’m kind of curious if anybody can think up of any biological reasons why man or woman would masturbate.
Thanks for any replies.
@jon bon van dame,
I think your 4-6 months of abstinence was probably a bit much, especially combined with your training, which also boosts testosterone levels. With all that testosterone flowing through your body, I’m not surprised at how aggressive you became. This is why I believe that we have a natural cycle that tries to correct our hormonal balances, one of which is through ejaculation/masturbation and why a usually only abstain for not more than 7-14 days.
@panagiotis,
Yes, it’s quite probable that you will ejaculate sooner during sex, but I wouldn’t let that be an issue as you should hopefully be able to bounce back for round 2 with minutes and last much longer. In addition, as you have more and more sex (hopefully) then you will get better at controlling the timing of your ejaculation. If you’re pre-mature, just shrug it off and tell her that was a practice round and the next one will blow her mind
@JP,
Well the point of this whole thing is the connection between the actual ejaculation and release of dopamine as a reward system. Therefore, if you masturbated but didn’t ejaculate, then you’re not depleting those hormones. So, in theory your idea could work, but I highly doubt most men could masturbate on a regular basis without the urge to finish to completion, so I really don’t think this is viable strategy.
I do think that we do need to orgasm on a particular cycle which I infer could be anywhere between 7-14 days depending on your age, diet, physical fitness, etc. As you say, eventually, our bodies will take care of this through wet dreams if it has to.
Awesome article, and awesome advice.
For the badly addicted, who are reading this article in hopes to quit – KNOW that this information will change your life – IF you are DETERMINED to follow it completely.
you won’t need to read “how to be attractive to women” articles anymore… It will come naturally. just as you will… haha
It is known that confidence is important in attracting women. Doing my reading on the matter, I have read people say that they found women were more attracted to them when they’re not masturbating. Like they can sense it.
Now of course, if you’re feeling better, more energetic, more manaly and confident you’re going to get more women interested in you but I’m wondering if a woman can subconciously/biologically tell if a guy is not masturbating and hence be more attracted to them. Kind of smilar to phermones thinking. It makes sense to me that a woman would want to be with a guy more who doesn’t masturbate compared to one that does all other things being equal and nature probably has a way of telling them that.
Anon, I like how you seem pretty certain on this matter. Would you care to share your knowledge? Thanks.
Women naturally have the tendancy of avoiding guys who overmasturbate. There is something natural in women which just take women away from you if you are overmasturbating.
Masturbation is very bad. its spoil your life.
Kambere
I came across this detailing people’s experiences abstaining. Check it out. http://www.reuniting.info/download/pdf/0.BENEFITS.pdf
This is an article that pretty much validates something I felt like I’ve known along. Long time ago a friend of mine was worked up about talking to a girl he likes and planned to masturbate the day before going up to her. I instinctively said “don’t or you might lose your sex drive. Then you won’t be able to talk to her as effectively.”
It was a response that came out of nowhere and this article reminds me of that spontaneous wisdom I shared with him.
In my personal experience, I do notice how introverted I become for the next few days after I freshly fap. I wasn’t always shameful about it until it became an excessive habit, and I think it is only THEN when it affects your life. After fapping, I would require 2-4 days to recover while being stuck in an apathetic rut.
I almost went a month without masturbating one time and I found myself being more willing to engage in social situations. I even became comfortable talking to my family for long bursts of time without trying to find things to occupy myself with in between silences. Silence just felt natural. I also tend to slow down my speech the less I fap, I feel a lot less anxious to get from one moment to the next.
I’ve recently rebooted and I think I’m on my 10th day of abstinence. I hope to completely quit from this point on and see if I can regain the clarity that’s been missing the past few years.
Though I gotta ask…would abstinence help me regain lost size or at least help maintain stiffness? Also, does abstinence have anything to do with your endurance and how long you can go? Because overfapping over stimulizes your nerves and so gets used to earlier and earlier releases.
Scientists and westerners praise the habit of masturbating. They claim that its healthy and normal.
In the beginning masturbating looks good. But with time you will realize that you have spoiled your body and you will regret it.
it will affect negatively your life in all aspects;
a) Social life:
-You will avoid people including your family members.
-You will avoid to talk to the opposite sex
-You will be alone without friends
b) Memory problems
-You will have difficulty to concentrate intellectually and slow to learn
-Serious Loss of memory
C) In marriage
-You will not satisfy sexually your partner since you will not have a strong erection(Risk of divorce)
-Impotence
d) Health
Masturbation has a serious health implication:
-Blurry vision
-weak immune system( i suspect that it can even make some one to test HIV+) am still researching on this.
-Rushes…
-Y
How and why does masturbation effect memory? I’m not disagreeing as from what I read I think I heard that before but I don’t understand why there is a connection. Why would masturbation effect memory? What’s the reasoning behind the body doing that? That’s something that’s hard for me to personally tell since I had memory problems both before and after masturbation.
So I had quit masturbation for a couple of weeks? there. Well, I did masturbate some but made sure not to go to orgasm till one night I accidently went too far. It seemed to take me a little longer to get the effects than others did but yes there was more energy and more achievment power inside the body. Sex drive was stronger and I felt/knew like I would cum sooner and there were more than a few times where all I could think about was women.
I actually never masturbated till I was 18 or over, than masturbated too much for years and years afterwards. Part of me would always search for info because I was wondering if it truly effect my energy levels (I love to exercise) +I had a bad feeling and some logical thoughts that it might be bad for you but I could never find info that it was actually bad for you. I mean if you look around for info on masturbation and lazy you will find most people saying BS to that with the possible exception of extreme masturbation. There is a funny animation PSA series on youtube or there was I can’t find it anymore where it warns about how you’ll get lazy, won’t be interested in females etc if you masturbate and almost all comments are on the video being way off. Thanfully, I heard from a few knowlegeable people while researching that this stuff can hurt you. So it’s good to find some information on this that validated my thoughts. I’m now on another non masturbation journey.
Why does it effect memory though?
How overmasturbation affect the brain:
As i always say. Masturbating is bad.very bad.consequenses are unbearable with time:
Frequent masturbation and ejaculation will stimulate the acetylcholine/parasympathetic nervous functions. Excessive masturbation and ejaculation can, and often times will, result in over-production of sex hormones and neurotransmitters such as acetylcholine, dopamine and serotonin. An unnatural abundance of these hormones and neurotransmitters can cause the brain and adrenal glands to perform excessive dopamine-norepinephrine-epinephrine conversion, in turn, making the brain and bodily functions perform at an extreme level. In other words, there is a huge change in body chemistry when one masturbates excessively. This leads into
Premature Ejaculation
and other frustrating sexual side effects.
While the normal physical “It takes at least 12
to 14 minutes for women to climax”
response for a man is to reach climax and ejaculate approximately 2 to 3 minutes after penetrating the vagina, the normal physical response for a woman is to build to a climax (orgasm) about 12 to 14 minutes after coitus (intercourse, sex) occurs. Some premature ejaculation cases are easy to diagnose, especially when the man ejaculates before he even enters a woman. In relationship terms, premature ejaculation can be diagnosed as ejaculating before the woman has an opportunity to orgasm. This is what over-masturbation can lead to – a disappointed woman and an unconfident man. but the man can also suffer from impotency,weak erection, chronic fatigue,blurry vision,weak immunity like that of HIV+ people,month dryness,…and many other serious side effects.
kambe
Ok, being shy around women I do not know if I have PE or not but it was always a concern of mine. Now one hears about how PE in a good percentage of men but I have always wondered what is the true amount of time a man should last with a woman? If someone’s body is in good shape all around, how long would they last on average? Is it supposed to be a shorter time as a way of nature making sure you impregnant and reproduce quickly? Or is it supposed to be hopefully longer because like as you mentioned in your post it takes longer for the woman to a climax. So shouldn’t we as guys be able to last approximately that long in order to satisfy our lady more? Looking at it from a biological standpoint, it would keep her more attracted to you which in turn would mean more chance for preganancy because hey it can take more than one time to get pregannt:) I wonder what the true amount of time a guy should last with women.
It’s interesting you mentioned PE because I was just recently reading that mercury when present in the system gives you PE. I’m also thinking back to a time I was taking something and if that helped me with staying power. I have ordered a herbal product and am curious to see the results of it.
So yeah, Kambe what do you say is the proper amount of time a guy should last with his lady? Also, what do yo think of the health effects of smaller amounts of masturbation? Thanks for your time.
I’ve heard a lot of things about the good effects of not masturbating for several weeks, but I’ve never gone more than a week without doing it. One thing I’ve heard is that your neuro-chemical state changes your pheromones and makes you more attractive like that.
I’m currently trying to go for 30 days. I’ll be able to do that because whenever I have the urge to masturbate, I watch videos of surgery and abscess drainage on Youtube instead. I’m currently on the third day.
I’ll report my findings when I’ve done that. In the mean time, I’ve found these things in the past:
Before an orgasm, without deodorant, I smell alright except for light musk. Right after an orgasm I smell fucking rancid.
The day after an orgasm, I’m far more likely to go into a “oh god everyone hates me and is only pretending to like me” state the next day. I’m also much less motivated to do something like working out.
Day two after an orgasm, those two things are much less likely.
Day three after an orgasm is basically more motivation and being more emotionally positive instead of emotionless or depressed. This increases in the following days.
Well, I masturbated yesterday from lack of willpower.
Today I’m completely depressed.
Par for the course.
To Some Dude: LOL watching videos of surgery. That’s genius! When “think unsexy thoughts” just doesn’t work
I’ve gone an entire year without a single drop of seed spilled. My bf was 7 percent, instead of 14 percent, I was able to remember pages of information at a time, and I was able to run faster, and my vertical increased 4 inches. Not only that, but I could have my way with any woman, married or not, girlfriend, you name it, they would eat out the palm. Something to do with the etheric body, and a breathing secret I discovered. I would share it, but absolute power corrupts.
I assume if you didn’t drop any seed, you didn’t have sex either?
Share absolute power just with me! I want to corrupt absolutely!
“Think about what people who abstain, especially in the army etc. for like a year. They lose all interest in it. I have read this many times. Soldiers report of having lost the urge to have sex”
This was written earlier in this thread. That worries me but you had the oppisiste effect which is great to hear. Before I started masturbating too often I never masturbated at all. Probably never did untill I was 18 or so. I am trying to remember how I felt. I know I didn’t lose interest in sex but maybe that’s impossible when you’re a teenager.
A couple of questions for you. Before you went the whole year, without dropping you seed how much information could you remember? Also, could you have women eating out of your palm if you weren’t flirting with them? Just from your presence?
A couple more
I’ll tell you what. I was a straight A student in highschool. There came a time though, after smoking for some time, that my life started falling apart. The way i stopped smoking cigarettes was to stop masterbating. I was edgy and almost went to jail several times, but eventually i did lose interest so to speak, but rather than lose it, it was at my command.
The sex function and all addiction are intertwined. This is just the nature of man. The first chakra is about sex. When we eat, a few hours later, we feel like having sex….sex is there, but we have to bring the energy up. You may not get rich, but you will get better in whatever it is you want to do. You will feel like you have add at first, you may change radically, even occupations. But in the end, you will be able to feel your soul and know the spirit of a matter. This is where the power comes.
it improves memory but it also makes it hard to initially memorize because of fighting the urge, you have to do it without repressing, does that make sense?
“Say, I want it, but i don’t need it”
I never was normal growing up. I’m still not. I was an extremely shy nerd (am a lot better now as I have worked on that but still am pretty shy) but yet had alpha male traits that I wasn’t supposed to have.
For the last month, I’ve been keeping a small journal every day on how I feel and what was the circumstances leading to that. So when and I masturbated and when I haven’t is definitely part of the observations. Yes, there is a difference when you do and when you don’t masturbate. This time I have gone 5 days without so far without orgasming and now I plan to go a lot further. I am pretty energetic and determined this morning.
To contribute some energy life advice here, I highly, highly reccomend people eating more organic raw food and leaving out all the processed junk. All the man altered stuff. This makes all the difference in the world in how you feel. Trust me on this. It’s very important to do this if you want to be the best person you can be.
After my own observations and a lot of reading on what attracts/repels women, I find it fascinating how much of us actions as humans are rooted from the tree of reproduction. If one thinks of the roots and the base of the tree as the need to reproduce, you will find that the branches or actions of we humans are results of the roots/base of the tree. Reproduction is the foundation. That was one of the reasons I decided I had to cut down on masturbation.
Okay, off to the gym I go:)
Placebo or not I swear I can feel more power in my testicles today. I’m determined. I’m also feeling mentally alert (though I am tired from lack sleep and I can really feel that) in a different way.
I’ve had trouble with self sacrifice in the past. Anybody here ever beat this problem while not masturbating?
i’m still reading the real donnie darko site and though long and confusing at times, it’s been enlightening respecting the negative effects of orgasm; not only that, through this and other readings and personal experience, now in my thirties, i’ve come to the conclusion that celibacy is a plus. But real abstinence not for the sake of sex, and not thinking about it; that’s where real “not-masturbating”is. You will be really amazed when you realize how much more powerful you become from a day of not even thinking about sex (hence the role of meditation) as compared to two weeks without it but thinking of it. The deal is that that’s is mental masturbation, and it definitely affects the physical, you will produce those hormones, the organ will get flooded with blood, your chemistry will change and energy will sip away from your organs; not only orgasm is bad, also thinking of sex will release valuable chemicals and fluids from your body, for instance through the urine, without going into more complicated detail.
Just experiment a few days of total-abstinence, it begins and continues in the mind, fending off temptation after temptation like flies: don’t look at that ass, look about something else, do something else, make a difference, change…you’ll notice something…
Much like any other drug, the addiction to porn and chronic masturbation is a modification of brain chemistry.
One of the ways to control these urges to masterbate is limit the sexual stimuli that are so accessible through the internet. It is important to remove the easy access to pornography and images that trigger you.
What has worked for me is to use Picblock http://www.cinchworks.com/ . You must not only block the imagery but the sexual content words to block all of the porno websites that are videos only. Set long password to protect yourself that you can’t remember… write it down and store the paper at work or somewhere that is not easily accessible.
There is some validity to this hypothesis. I’m currently into day 4 without whacking it and I feel strong. I have hit on tons of women (usually I’m a tad shy or rely on jokes) but they are incredibly receptive and many (the attractive or confident ones) flirt back. In fact I’ve got a date with a really attractive and intelligent woman. That never used to happen. Intelligence used to intimidate me (and it turned me off) but currently it doesn’t bother me. In fact I find her incredibly desirable. Both physically and emotionally.
Women stare at me more often as well. I wonder if the extra testosterone biochemically attracts females (kind like pheromones in bees). There is more to it than physical attraction though. I run faster, bowl (cricket) a lot quicker, lift stronger and I picked up a language (Japanese, lol). I haven’t turned into an elite athlete in 4 days but I am noticing a significant improvement. In 4 days I’ve become more energetic and open to experience (life that is). In terms of health I think I have better posture, my hair seems healthier, my acne improved drastically and my tinea on my right foot has nearly disappeared.
Why though? Possibly the depletion of zinc during frequent masturbation led to the health issues. The addiction (self proclaimed) may have shot my self esteem as well. The reward systems in the brain are hijacked by porn which may have developed an unhappy attitude. Also, abstinence has given me extra energy which is directed into something positive. It can’t be masturbation alone that has had such an effect as I have also worked on my diet for months and for the past year I have been exercising frequently (as opposed to sporadically). Nevertheless it seems frequent masturbation is unhealthy.
Interesting article. So, I am a female, and I just broke up with someone (long-distance relationship), and I had not been physically touched in 7 months by a man and I had not masturbated in four weeks. I really missed the touch of a man. This past weekend I masturbated before I went out to the club, and guys were all over me. Safe to say…I got touched. I never do things like this at all. I am usually shy, reserved, and a very modest dresser and was not looking to get any action. I was kinda horny but not to the point where I usually am. I definitely stepped out of my comfort zone and all of the guys were really forward. I must have been on my A game, but I definitely think masturbating before hand really helped. I will have to try it again to see if there is a trend.
So I think this is interesting. I was looking for more of a scientific article about phermones and how scents from that area can attract members of the opposite sex.
JoeBig, when you went a whole year without dropping your seed, did you notice any differences within you due to that like say at the 2 week mark, 1 month mark, 2 month mark and so on? Is going 11 months any better than say going 3 months? Did the positive effects plateau after a certain bit? Were they any negative effects? Was there any or much variance?
Since I never masturbated till I was 18 I myself went years without purposely extracting (unintentionally yes) my seed. But I never took notes on how I felt before and after I started masturbating because at the time I didn’t realise how much of a difference it could make. , I wish I did take notes. I never was normal. I was a strong nerd combined with alpha male traits. Two different people.
Now that I think about it, I think part of the reason girls liked me even though I could hardly mutter one word to them was because I didn’t masturbate. I also had an explosive temper at times which was different coming from such a quiet person. I still always felt in control though but I know I must have scared a few people. I had that after masturbation too but I think it might have lessened.
Currently 10 days without dropping my seed.
Explosive temper but I never hurt anyone
Really glad to have come across the 2003 study via this. Nevertheless, it’s worth noting that the increase isn’t 147%, it’s 47%, or an increase TO 147% of baseline, not an increase BY 147%. Namely, testosterone increases from around 374ng/dL to around 524ng/dL, not from 374 to over 1000.
I am on day 3 and I have to say I have been completely changed by this already. for years now I have certainly over indulged in masturbation and coming to this site made me immediately reconsider what I’ve been doing.
Sadly I’ve felt almost desperate to find a nice girl (or two) right now and I have not felt good about it recently. I got laid two months ago and kissed with a few hot girls since then, but I want more.
At work tonight I was on fire. I work with a lot of cute girls and tonight I was on cue, I was not anxious and basically pitiful mentally as I feel I can sometimes be. I could feel my energy orientating through everyone else. I was oozing postive energy. My energy level was through the roof. Earlier today when i sat down to read I felt much calmer and better able to comprehend the book
It really is interesting and invigorating. I am going to stick with this for a while and probably use the 7 day cycle.
Great post, great comments.
I’ll add: if you must masturbate, use a sex toy, like the Fleshlight. I’m not sure why guys settle for their hands when their are toys out there now that actually come close to simulating a vagina. I guess it’s taboo, and that’s a shame.
Apply the 7-day cycle, but replace your hand with a sex toy (Fleshlight, pocket pussy, etc).
Still a glitch in my precedent message, here the good one (I hope) :
—-
Good post indeed, I think it’s a good summary of many men experience. I would like to add something. (maybe it have already been noted, I did not read all comments)
Maybe their is a difference between masturbating to porn and masturbating using your imagination (in your mind). I have experienced with this and masturbating to porn is a very rapid and genital only experience while masturbating with your mind is a much longer, realistic and whole body experience. That would explain why some people say that masturbation make them to cum too rapidly when they have real sex, they develop the habit to have genital only and less complete sex.
The father of bioenergy, Alexander Lowen, wrote a great book about sexuality, Love and Orgasm. He speak about mature sexuality, love and also explain his view of homosexuality. He describe neurotic sexuality to be genital centered with a tense and hard body as opposed to mature sexuality to be whole. To me his view of neurotic sexuality resemble a lot to porn masturbation.
I also experience many thing you mention, especially motivation and social anxiety wise. Would be great to have best of both world.
Great post,
I went through that this whole week. No masturbation. I compared it to how my lifestyle was before : crazy change !!!
It really builds up gradually. But already after two days, you can feel the energy filling your whole body. I am much more productive and I feel much stronger mentally and physically. I felt like I could take anyone into a fight ! I managed to exercise with more strenght, it really feels like your muscles are stronger.
And with relating to people, it is so much easier to have this alpha male aura surrounding you. You don’t even have to do much, people can feel it.
It was definitely a good experience for me.
I’m changing to a 7 days cycle from now on for at least three months to see how things go.
testosterone increase wanted : “This is spartaaaaaa !!!”
This is intresting, I am trying to achieve 40 days no-mastrubation. But I still look at porn, how does porn damage you if you watch it without masturbating.
I will update my 40 days of no mastrubation
Good question. I’m at the computer a lot and I do take a look at porn once in awhile plus sometimes I’ll put an erotic picture up as motivation. I went about 21 days without orgasming until I went too far one night.
Now I’m at 15 or 16 and I’m feeling postive effects. I actually feel more horny this cycle than I did last time. I did masturbate 2 or 3 times but didn’t orgasm. Looking forward till yor 40 day update.
hey there guys, im trying to abstinate for 30 days and im about at 10 days. when younger i used to masturbate way too much and i had all the side effects. I reduced a bit last year but i want to try abstaining and i also have PE.
I don’t want to hijack this thread but I think that this is misleading. The whole point is not to stop to masturbate but to stop to masturbate to porn.
Sex is an oportunity to connect with our body, to experience deep breath, to feel present. This is what usually happen when you make love with a woman. When you do masturbate in front of porn, your experience is genital only, in fact you disconnect from your body. In lact of a partner, the best alternative is to make love to a woman in your mind. Your experience will be different, but this will be much closer to real sex than what porn can give you.
I do not have that much of experience with this, but my little experience show me that this is better like this. I feel more grounded and more present and I can do it everyday. To refrain from masturbating is not the way to go in my opinion. Sex is a wonderful tool if use rightly. Many people have experienced psychological side effects after long abstinence (those who followed Mantak Chia teaching on the subject for exemple).
After all, what can you make feel more men than to picture yourself making love to a women ?
The more you masturbate the less interest you have in going out and getting sex from a real girl. If you are fulfilling that need or at least part of it by yourself, you are less likely to go out and seek a girl. That has been my experience. If you take care of yourself one night you probably will not go out that night because the reason you were going out is to get sex, get that release. If you masturbate before going on a date you will act more beta, because you do not have that drive in you.
Does any men really need to stop to masturbate for one week to desire a women ? I think that inner well being is more important for us to easily approach women and that “healthy masturbation” help a lot with this.
I don’t do this to be right, only want to share something that is the result of a lot of struggle for me. Something that may not be at first appealing as porn or nor as easy but that pay in the long run. As it is with a lot of drug consumption.
I hope someone will try it and report back his experience (see my previous post). Everyone is different and experience may vary though.
For me personally,. I noticed a huge increase in my agressive behavior in addition to the increased hornness. Irritability as a side effect was also pronounced. both of these were more intense after the first week of continued abstinence though.
Thanks for the article. I’m gonna give the 7 days thing a shot for as long as I can keep it up and see how it goes for me. In addition, I won’t watch any porn when I jerk it.
Woohoo! I won’t be masterbating to any girls on a computer screen getting fucked by other guys! n maybe I’ll *whisper* even get laid!
The longest I’ve gone without masturbation is nine months. The first two months in my opinion were the most challenging; the last seven months were fairly easy.
Masturbation and ejaculation is mentally and physically draining. Without masturbating for nine months, physically I felt good. My mind felt sharp but I also became more emotionally solid. There was a big difference in my emotional state, which doesn’t surprise me considering the hormonal impact masturbation has.
This has been an intersting read. Since I spilt with my ex last September I have been knocking one out far too often to the point where I wasn’t really bothering to get laid. After a siz month drought I thought enough is enough and have managed to hookup with a very hot lady with a very open mind and healthy appetite. My problem has been that despite feeling horny as hell just at the thought of her I was having problems getting and maintaing the necessary equipment and I was taking an age to finish. The latter part wasn’t a problem for her but very frustrating for me so after reading this I’m going to give 7 days a try but the thought of seven days???, I can’t recall managing more than three………..
Last week I watched a re-run of Blue Mountain state, a comedy about a college football team, and one of the players had a vision and was told to abstain from any sort of pleasure for a week. He did and he became this amazing testosterone run machine and was just wrecking everyone else on the team. And was wondering if this has any truth to it or if they were just over exaggerating how it worked. So i guess what I’m asking is, does being celibate also increase your strength, anger or anything like that as well?
On day 8, and having trouble getting to sleep and staying asleep. I feel great during the day but as the day winds down I start to get uncomfortable, I get mild headaches and become restless through the night. Any ideas on how to get a good nights rest?
Just the post I was looking for. I have been searching for this kind of information but always wound up with information that masturbation is calming and whatnot and is recommended to be practiced. Recently I started to change my life in a big ways and after I decided to quit watching porn I felt motivated to find more information about masturbation and then I found this site.
It is now about 4th day of my abstaining and I am feeling great. No more timid, anxious, beta, at least a lot less then I used to feel like. I will probably abstain for about 10 days or bit more to see all the effects it can have on me.
While searching for the effects of porn on man I found very interesting article that has the similar quality as this post and will possibly be interesting read for someone out there:
Pornography’s Effects on Adults
This was great. Personally, the reason I quit masturbating FOREVER was for the following two reasons:
1) It demotivated me from actually pursuing women, as you wrote about
2) The feeling of having sex is so much more satisfying than jerking off.
In regards to my first point, I love the feeling of having all this built up sexual goodness inside of me just waiting to explode and drench a woman. It makes me feel like Im doing them a service in saving myself for them. They should be thankful.
As for number two, after masturbating I think to myself, “I just sat here for about an hour with my d*ck in my hand looking at smut. I could have been doing so many other productive things.” Its always UNsatisfying those few moments of orgasm. With a woman is a different story. Its ALWAYS satisfying and Ive never thought I could be doing something better. Having an orgasm as a result of direct female contacts beats your hand ALL THE TIME!
Well in fact I’ve had a semi – mandatory 7 day jerk off routine, because of bootcamp.
Since there wasn’t much privacy involved, and I didnt fancy jerking off while some other guy was on the wall next to me taking a shit or something, I would wait for the weekend to do it. I can’t explain why, but I think the fact i was doing so much physical exercise, trying new things and not masturbating, all this combined, gave me a sort of iron will that made me want to do things that were productive all the time even after bootcamp had long gone.
So I conclude now that, 7 day ( ish) routine for self love + regular sleeping patterns + regular exercise + hard work + proper diet = awesome feeling of motivation: In fact, im going to start doing all this again. Thank you for the article, it has given me some amazing insight on my life.
I am waking up to day six of no masterbation. I can vouch for the majority of these statements, I am obviously more horny, and in the past three days, I’ve had more women responsive/approach me than I have in the past two years combined. I am what you call a chronic masterbator, started when I was about fourteen years old. I am 31 now an I have NEVER made it to 6 days with out shooting my load out. The mental clarity is real (including visualization of my now empowered sexual imagination). Shits crazy. The pheramone thing must be legit, I feel like Fuckin Superman.
I first read this post one week ago and on reading its title I thought it would be just another random blog that would have little relevance to my life. However on reading the various posts of contributors I was taken aback at firstly how frank people were and secondly how changing their masturbation habits affected them. This lead me to reflect on my own situation.
I never really thought too much about my own masturbation habits. I always considered it a private and normal thing but never something that ever really affected the way I thought, acted or behaved generally.
I no longer think that way and its only been about 4 days.
Looking back at my own habits I now have to say that I would have to categorize myself as a chronic masturbator. Ever since that first mind bending, life altering wank in the bathroom before school scarcely a day had passed when I didn’t ‘knock one out’ Scrap that. ‘Knock a few out’ . Save for several years in my teens I can honestly say that most of it has never been born out of a high sex drive. Boredom was probably the number one culprit but couple that with a baron sex life until I was in my early twenties and I ended up with a fruitless marriage of convenience between my dick and my hand. Also having read some other posts I’m now convinced my excesses are to blame for dull, limp sexual encounters.
Being 31 now and spent the last 2 years travelling the world I do feel myself at some sort of crossroads. Life for me has always been about ‘someday’ or ‘sure i’ll do that tomorrow’. when you reach 30 you do feel your time is more finite and that there is no ‘someday’. Only now. Masturbation perfectly accommodated this mindset allowing me crap sexual gratification which lead no where.
So how is the de-wanking experiment going? Currently not the life altering experience that taking it up was, but I dont think it ever will be. So far its been about not falling back on that fail-safe dopamine hit that always lead to inaction and trying to put my mind to better use. I’m not surprised that I think about sex alot, but what I am surprised about is the number of times my mind suggests an act of onanism.
I look forward to hopefully experiencing some of the effects I’ve read about. watch this space.
I know my post was long-winded but this is honestly the 1st time I’ve ever contributed to a blog.
Posting with Anon and dummy e-mail for irrelevant stuff…
But, I think this article just solved all of my problems.
I completely agree with this 100%. I started masterbating at the very early age of 7 years old. I masterbated everyday, sometimes more than twice a day until I was 18. I never got laid in high school and I never had the desire to. I was never really ambitious about doing anything. I just stayed home all day and masterbated. I felt sort of akward around people, and I always wanted to be alone. Then one day I finaly got laid. I wanted more of that but didn’t really pursue it much, because I was still masterbating. Then I heard my friend talking to one of his family members. He said he felt bad because he couldn’t help himself from masterbating. Now, my friend wasn’t the most attractive guy in the world, but somehow he almost always got laid by attractive chicks. That’s when I thought to myself, “Is that the secret? To not masterbate”? So I gave it a shot. I quit coled turkey, and it was soooooo frustrating. I was always mad, and I couldn’t stand still. After a week, it became much easier. I noticed that I was more active and confident around not only attractive females, but all people. I would start making moves on females that I would never make moves on before. I eventually ended up being in a 2 year relationship with a super attractive chick, that I would never in a million years have the guts to even look at for to long during my masterbation days.
Yes masterbation is normal and everybody does it, but just stop for a while. Get over the frustation part of it, and witness how much more confidence you have in your everyday life.
Everybody has a different set of genes. We are different. Some people have to marry lest they burn inside. Others are somehow able to abstain, even their whole lives without any problem. Some had to work at it all their lives. The sex thoughts for some completely dissapear. It is a conscious choice. Others are just that way. Masturbating is healthy in extreme moderation but it is not the purpose of our purpose. Love is. Over sex is eqaully unhealthy.
Stopping and holding thus abstaining from climax can if extended too often cause the developement of spermidicells which are small balls that develop right on your balls. They can cause pain or other complictions.
Sadly, I relapsed last week but Im back on it again and its been about 4 or 5 days now. But it feels different now. When I initially started I felt the horny tingling in my balls when a good looking girl walked by but I dont have that now. I dont know what the deal is. I used to welcome that feeling because it made me more aggressive with the ladies but its gone. It seems as tho Im losing my sex drive this go around. The once positive aspects of masturbation (being more aggressive with women for one) is gone…
Holding off for a week is not going to do jack shit! You don’t start to reabsorb your semen making you strong, brave, heroic, and manly until after 3 months of semen retention.
I usually retain 21 days t0 90 days.
I’m currently on my 26th day and I feel incredible.
Savage, I am absolutely impressed that I wasn’t the only one in the world thinking this. A couple years back I noticed that the common denominator in some of my short comings as a person was pretty much jacking off too much. So I stopped for a while. I went to parties, got some punani, and got amazingly fit. And so I freaking love you for making this public. On a side note, my dandruff reduced considerably when I stopped, so if anybody’s got chronic dandruff problems, try this!
Damn, it feels good to be going strong on this one again. Its been about a week now and Im mentally committed to this FOREVER. My problem was that I would look at porn “just because” and told myself I had no intention of jerking off. That would happen several times without me actually masturbating then I would relapse and I would relapse hard. For me, if I dont have that visual online stimulus I dont care for masturbation. I only want to masturbate when I look at porn, never if Im blue balled or something. So for me the fix is easy, remember the reasons why I want to stop and find other things to do with my free online time. COLD TURKEY and I aint lookin back fellas.
Masturbation is SELF ABUSE. it will undoubtedly reduce your self esteem and self worth, even if you do not agree, it is still the truth. it is in no way a substitute for good sex.. feeling sexy? find a beautiful chic, suck her out, give it to her hard and wild and feel great about yourself… rather than stroking urself out. MASTURBATION is for the BETA MALE, d weaklings. The ALPHA MALE needs sex and does it with a pretty chic that is worthy of his semen. Thank you
This definitely makes a lot of sense. Thanks Matt for making this public. I’ve had a lot of free time so I’ve been “fapping” haha pretty much every day and I felt horrible. Although other factors in my life may have made it conducive for sadness and depression, I feel fapping made it much worse and allowed these feelings to perpetuate. I’m on day 3 and I’m committed.
Kind of like the movie 40 days and 40 nights where every girl starts to want Josh Hartnett (forgot the characters name) after he starts abstaining, I guess the pheromones really start to work on women.
Though I hate using examples in movies, this is applicable.
To answer some peoples concerns, I feel that jerking off is necessary at times. Anyone who can get some whenever they want a the snap of a finger is a GOD. Maybe some people can but most definitely not me.
I always look at girls in a sexual way but I suspect itll increase now. Has anyone noticed this happening a lot more after abstaining?
Hopefully my abstinence can carry over to other parts of my life and start to lift my spirits.
Yea your right Jay, it will increase now. I was able to do 6 days and I was just looking at everything. Since then I haven’t been able to stop. I want to go for 2 weeks – a month but its hard. I ve already broken it 3 times since I have last tried.
Going to start again and hopefully I can get whacking off out of my head.
Jay,
It WILL carry over to other parts of your life. Firstly, you’ll just feel more complete and self satisfied by knowing you have control over your mind and your body. That in itself will translate positively into every aspect of your life.
I felt like you after masturbating, just worthless and sad sometimes and knowing that feeling will come is an extra motivator to not masturbate.
Keep strong fellas. Lets do this!! Were men, we aint children who fall at every sign of temptation.
Study: Endocrine response to masturbation-induced orgasm in healthy men following a 3-week sexual abstinence.
Positive aspects (after 7 days):
-Increase in motivation to whatever I focus my mind on
-Increase in happiness, finding random shit funny
-More social
-Social anxiety reduced
-Smiling more
-I feel more connected to people around me
-I feel calmer and I can focus alot better than before
-Easier to stick to routines and doing mundane stuff
-Increase in confidence
As for the negative, mood swingin’ is the only thing I can come up with right.
Abstinence fucking rocks. Seeev your seeemen fur the weeemen. *some random fucked english accent*
Also, my memory is better!
I also get these strange nostalgia-memory feelings from nowhere!
I’m also trying this after reading this article, just for the hell of it. I gotta say I haven’t felt so drastic changes as some other people here report. I’m on day six. But today I feel like I had a shitload of caffeine or something, I have this weird pent up energy that I can’t get rid of. It’s pretty uncomfortable actually, but I’ll try to ignore it, since I’m curious to see what (hopefully positive) effects this experiment will have if I continue a while longer.
I am on day 53 and I feel more manly, dominant, and aggressive. I also am more charismatic and outgoing. My voice has also gotten deeper. My memory has enhanced. I have skin that’s glowing; and my energy level is higher than ever person inside the room. (besides the kids). I just feel more powerful!
DAMN PETE!!!! 53 days? Nice. Ive relapsed a few times but Im in the 2nd week of it and I will not relapse this time. I sort of had to have a moment of self-conversation to really see the reasons why I was doing this and Ive never felt better.
“This guy”,
That “weird energy” is the initial effect of the lack of masturbating. I know exactly what you mean. Just use that energy and focus it somewhere else, like at the gym.
>Rashad
Yeah, you’re probably right, and I did think about going to the gym, but decided against it since I had been to the gym the day before and I didn’t want to overtrain. I’m curious to see if I’m gonna have a permanent energy boost from this experiment.
On a side note, I was at a party last night where the host told me that one of girls (whom I had never met) fancied me. I ended up sleeping with another girl, but I was pretty wasted, so the sex was pretty meh for me and I didn’t finish (I can go forever when I’m drunk). I don’t know if my abstinence from masturbation had anything to do with attracting these girls, but I will be sure to look for a patterns in the coming weeks.
This Guy,
There we go! I think not masturbating does help in attraction. I think its a pheromone thing, like these girls can sense that we have all this sexual energy some how. As far as it being a permanent energy, Ive noticed it has its peaks and valleys. You might go for stretches of days with the buzz of energy then one day it may not be as high. Thats how it is for me but it might be diff for you based on what your body chemistry is like.
I just wanted to check in. I have this page bookmarked, HAHA. Back to football. Go Packers!
This article is heaven-sent. The article and the comments all concur with my own experiences. I am now 28 years old and have struggled with chronic masturbation since I was around 16. Right around 22, I began losing my hair in the frontal area of my scalp. By age 26, my hair loss accelerated to the crown, and although I still have hair on my head, I have lost considerable amounts. Throughout this time, I masturbated between one and two times a day. Recently, I tried stopping for one week and noticed that less hair was in bathtub after showering. I also felt much more confident, less feelings of insecurity and more virile. I just felt electric. I can only imagine that these feelings get better throughout the months after abstaining. However, I am pretty confident that my hairloss is due to my excessive masturbation, since both of my parents did not lose hair at such a young age. This might be due to abnormal testosterone conversion into DHT, which is linked to hairloss in men.
I have been relapsing off and on throughout the years and hopefully after reading this article, I will have the motivation to stop for a longer period of time. Seeing all of these comments with similar symptoms is all the proof that I need. I will be using my laptop in public versus in private to avoid the temptation to look at porn. I will keep you posted.
Dave,
In all honesty, its easy not to relapse and extremely difficult at the same time. Im sure everyone knows this. The best deterrent is to do what your doing (public vs. private internet use) or just discipline yourself to not go on those sites. The only time I wanna masturbate is when Im searching for it, never anytime else.
Rashad,
Thanks for responding. Your absolutely right. Abstaining from masturbation is tough. It really is a chemical addiction per se, not unlike those faced by certain drug users. I’ve had problems with concentration, maintaining erections, mild depression and mood swings. I never realized that far-reaching impact that testosterone and dopamine have on the body. I’m just hoping that these side-effects disappear after a few months.
Although I read articles on alternative medicine websites that discussed the dangers of chronic masturbation, I never took it too seriously, since Western medicine has yet to provide enough conclusive evidence to demonstrate this phenomenon. I should have been more open minded. Check out “sexual exhaustion” while running a Google search.
I’ve never been away from masturbation for more than a week and a half, so I’m not sure what I would experience after that period of time elapses. But I can say with certainty, that after four days of no masturbation, I feel like a different person. I’m far more sociable, creative and productive.
I would always tell myself, I’ll watch porn for 30 minutes or so and promise myself not to masturbate. You know the outcome. At this point, I’m done with porn. It’s not worth the risk now or in the long run. May we both overcome this habit.
I wanted do thank you for posting this article up, this read has encouraged me into abstaining for 2 weeks now, despite being sick I can already tell that i have more energy and more motivation to do activities than I did when i was masturbating every day. not only that but its easier to talk to people and actually be able to carry on a conversation. I’m only 20 years old and I have a lot of patching up to do in my life, and this has definitely put me headed in the right direction, as I’ve been addicted to pornography since the age of 12, and by the age of 16 I barely had any motivation in school (depression) and hardly any motivation to have a girl friend.
My goal right now is to abstain for about 3 months total, and I hope to have gain huge improvements in my lifestyle from doing this. Good luck to everyone struggling with this as well, I wish you all the best.
I’ve really been enjoying the last 10+ days of not masturbating or watching porn at all and I feel like I could go on forever.
I, too, have had a lot more energy and motivation to do all kinds of things. I’ve actually found my long gone musical inspiration once again + music in itself has started to sound better and deeper.
Here are some encouraging stories that have really helped me a lot:
http://yourbrainonporn.com/rebooting-accounts
So I got to day 13 and I couldn’t take it anymore. I went to a party the same night and was pursued very persistently by a girl whom I’m not interested in. There was another girl there who I’ve hooked up with once before and wouldn’t mind hooking up with again, but that was thwarted by the other girl. Oh well. But it seems I was deemed attractive despite the fact that I’d masturbated earlier that day. But it is almost impossible to determine what impact abstinance has on your luck with women, at least when you don’t have more data than I have. I think I’ll start having 7- or 14-day cycles of masturbation abstinence from now on as I did notice some interesting effects on my testostorone, but I don’t wanna go completely “no fap”. Everything in moderation, masturbation and abstinance alike.
This Guy,
Hey man, I understand. The cycling is a good idea also. Ima admit I relapsed last night after coming back from a Halloween party, there was just so much booty out it was insane. Female costume are just the sexy version of something: sexy nurse, teacher, dog etc. No imagination required at all. But Im getting off point. I was gonna post something on here but I felt like I talked myself up so much that posting my relapse (again) would be lame, HAHA. But it was around 12 days for me and I didnt feel any shame in relapsing, I just felt like it needed to be done. Your right, moderation is key and cycling is probably the best bet. The key is just dont let masturbation become your exclusive sexual release. When it becomes your only orgasm…thats when you have the problem.
Rashad,
I had the same feeling, I didn’t feel like I had failed when I relapsed either. Seems like we have the same outlook on this subject. It is important, as Modern Savage also writes somewhere, not to think that abstinence is some magic formula that automatically will get us girls. It is merely a tool which for some people can be helpful when used correctly.
Alrite..
first of all, credit to who deserves it.. yes you Savage..
Now I never had a problem getting women.. I have had sex with over 300 women so far (Im 31 – lost virginity at 17)
Once in high school I stopped fapping for a WHOLE MONTH and to be honest I still remember a little how good and strong I felt..
I either fucked or fapped at least 5 times a week (some exceptions of course – where only had sex and let me tell you it was good now when I think back)
Long story short recently broke a girl’s heart and realized how I have been treating women and need to stop cheating, lying, manipulating women and use them for sex.. along with figuring out where I am in life and everything I wanted to tackle this fapping issue.. I always knew in my heart I shouldn’t..
Anyways, learned alot from this blog and I am stopping cold turkey.. Im bald and skinny but Ima charmer and a sweet talker and that gets me through every woman;s barrier.. Ima natural my friends think.. I am not gonna fap but Im still going to have sex.. still no strings attached but I’ll be honest instead of playing head games..
AND.. I will keep you guys updated.. Its been four days since I last masturbated but I did have sex last night with a cute mommy I picked up last week.. Im going on a work trip to toronto this weekend.. although I got 2 girls lined up there for me, Im NOT going to masturbate.. I usually jerk off EVERY SHOWER so once a day and sometimes twice :p
Hey guys, this was an awesome article that gave me some inspiration to abstain from masturbating to see what would happen.
I also suggest you guys check out:
http://www.reddit.com/r/NoFap
and
http://www.yourbrainonporn.com
I know some guys are in it for the 7-day cycle, rather than completely no fap, but it’s really awesome to hear the experiences of guys who are already good with women and trying out No Fap. There are a lot of guys on r/NoFap that agree that even guys who are clueless with women, virgins, or forever-alone types are getting ridiculous improvements with their relations with women, myself included, with No Fap.
Thanks!
NoFapEnthusiast,
Thanks for the links, some good info on there. Im now at the point where I want to get back into it full time, as in, no fapping ever (I’m using this word “fap” for the first time in history, never used it before today). I just want to rid my life of porn altogether. Im at the stage in my life where I dont want to be involved with anything that isnt progressing my life forward and I feel like searching for erotica and masturbating grinds my life to a halt for hours at a time. Yes, I relapsed recently and I felt no shame, but that feeling of having mastery over my mind and body is a thrill in its own. I had a high from it, knowing that I had willpower and self control and it translated positively into other aspects of my life. Im back on it fellas. Third times the charm, right? I know what mistakes I made last time and I wont make them again.
Rashad
I went to the yourbrainonporn-website and I gotta say it’s pretty convincing. So I’ll also stop watching porn, though it’s gonna be tough.
@ Rashad – Ditto on the “fap” vernacular. I, too, have recently recognized the debilitating, adverse effects masturbation/pornography were having on my life. After over 15 year in slavery and bondage to both I am finally, through knowledge, understanding, wisdom, and the power and strength of Christ, breaking free from the shackles of iniquity and walking out from under the shadow of evil. I had been experimenting with the 7 – day cycle before I even stumble across this website and, after reading these testimonies and stories provided here by all of you, my own experiences have been all but confirmed. I am much, much, more socially adroit not only with women I fancy but with everybody. My axiety is a sprinkle of what it used to be and I can confidently look people in the eyes and carry on a more controlled, intelligent conversation. The boucne in my step has returned. The glow of my skin is luminous. My stuttering has stopped! And the black bags under my eyes have disappeared altogether! I’m more dominant, assertive, and level headed. I attract the attention of women wherever I go and my erections have been bigger and stronger. Women absolutely have some sort of innate ability to sense wether of not a man is already in a relationship with Mary Palm and her five sisters. The pheremone revelation is an interesting one. I should have to look more into it.
Please, if there is anybody reading this who wishes to escape from pornography for good, I am going to recommend you do two (2) things:
1) Repent. Ask God to forgive you and then ask for His help.
2) On youtube.com, watch:
a. “Pornography -Through Jesus’ Eyes-” by fotm1 (Doug Perry)
b. “Porn -Soul Ties- Danger!” by fotm1 (Doug Perry)
c. “Impartation -Transference-” by fotm1 (Doug Perry)
This is not a chastisement of masturbation. I still partake in it, just, not on a 2-5 times per day basis anymore. It is my ardent prayer that these videos will awaken you to the spiritual, mental, physical, and emotional oppression that pornography perpetrates. Go as long as you can without masturbation but do your best to keep it between 14 and 21 days. I myself have never gone beyond 17, but, praise God, what a difference! Next goal: 21 days!
@ Mhollerho Abimbola Enoch – Masturbation really is for the beta male. Don’t settle for second best, men. Be an Alpha Wolf!
@ This Guy – I knwo how you feel. I felt the same way. This is what I found. Porn addiction is just like any other addiction be it drugs, cigarettes, or alcohol. Yes, it is tough to quit on your on sheer will power and strength, but, through the power and might of Jesus Christ which strengthens you, you can do anything. After some weeks of abstaining from pornography, just the mere thought of it turned me off. My attitude towards it did a complete 180. Years of porn abuse was making it difficult for me to get an erection when I was with a REAL women. It’s really not a matter of should you stop. It’s a matter of you MUST stop. For your own overall health and dignity as a man. Check out those videos I suggested above. They really helped me! This, the beginninig, is going to be the hardest for you. An old chinese proverb states “A journy of 1000 miles starts with a single step.” You already took yours. If one man can recover any man can recover! I’m proud of you and will keep you and everyone struggling with this evil at the very center of my prayers.
@Blood of the Wolf – I’m not religious, so I’ll have to rely on my own willpower, but thanks anyway:). First time I lasted 12 days. Second time I only lasted four days because I simply couldn’t fall asleep one night and I had to get up early the next day, so in the end I gave in. But this has only strengthened my resolve not to give in this time. This time I’m gonna begin with being fap (and porn) free for the rest of November and see what happens.
Hello everyone. This is just an update since my last post. I am on my eighth day of no PMO, and I can say for a fact, it has been incredibly difficult.
Day 1: Mild depression but otherwise no noticeable effects.
Day 2: I felt a gradual spike in my overall mood. I had a difficult time falling and staying asleep.
Day 3: I felt noticeably more horny throughout the day. I still had difficulties falling asleep and staying asleep. I attribute this to withholding from masturbation, which has caused me to be more aroused.
Day 4: I had the day off of work, so I didn’t have an opportunity to gauge my interactions with people. Overall, I did feel more complete and energetic.
Day 5: I had more energy although lack of sleep was noticeable. I was on fire at work. My increase in energy and concentration was definitely felt by the customers at work. A lot of them smiled during conversations and I felt a strange magnetism to girls that I found attractive. There was greater eye contact and a sense of warmth and strength in the pelvic region.
Day 6: I still had trouble getting a good nights rest. My energy levels seem to have plateaued.
Day 7-8: I am hoping that I get back in to my normal sleep cycle, as my sleep deprivation seems to be overriding the increase in energy from no PMO. My level of horniness seems to have subsided just a little. I don’t have the strong urge to masturbate nor do I feel a need to look at porn. It is difficult having to go to work with no sleep and I am proud of myself for not giving in and PMO’ing to put myself to sleep.
I’ve lost a good amount of hair in the frontal region of my scalp as well as lost the strong “clenching”erections of my teenage years. I miss looking at an attractive woman and getting a “full” spontaneous erection. These reasons are enough to motivate me to press forward. As of now, my erections have improved somewhat but no were near the quality during my youth. I still have a long way to go. This is a challenging process for me since I am venturing into unknown territory. There have times when I wanted to succumb to temptation, but I have managed to struggle through it. I envision myself with improved confidence, dating a beautiful woman. That keeps me going. I will keep you posted.
In interesting article…
http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/releases/136672.php
My teenage years were more about depression, lack of self-confidence, and lots of masturbation than anything else. In my 16th year I pretty much gave up on girls my age and fantasized about underage girls and fantasies escalated to depravity. And it all goes back to my early childhood. Who would’ve guessed, huh? Had to do with shame over being caught playing doctor with a neighborhood girl. Anyway, I wasted my 20′s on sexual fantasy, as an escape, as an easy way out, and instant gratification and suspense. 34 years old now and more or less a virgin. I have had my chances and bed encounters but I have equated sexual settings with social settings and turned off the passion by instinct. Complacent also as to how to actually carry out an intercourse. What’s expected, and what the limits are. Also, the bar for what makes me excited is set high, and I currently need perverted stuff to get a hard-on. Been a Christian for 7 years. Doesn’t really go hand in hand with an unyielding consumption of porn.
Well, I’m on day 3 now. No porn, no masturbation. Yesterday, a little naughty banter with an online girl I know. Didn’t get much of an erection. Voice is getting deep again. Moody. Aggressive, even towards my cat unfortunately. Not noticing an energy surge yet. Hands feel stronger, firmer. Voice increasingly deeper.
I will report back in a few days.
Noticed that I used the wrong word in my previous post. I didn’t mean “complacent” but “confused”. English in not my native tongue.
Mattias,
This will definitely help you. Youve said youre already experiencing the effects? Well, put those effects to good use. Join a gym if your more aggressive. Seriously, from your post you dont seem like the gym type, but getting your body in shape will only double, or triple, the effects of giving up masturbation. Once you know how to channel the positive aspects of this thats when you win. Dont relapse for nothing man, its not worth it. Good luck, partner.
Alright…after reading ALL the comments on here…I REALLY want to try this. I’m 16 years old, been masturbating since I turned 13. I masturbate everyday. I plan to do the 7 day cycle since I am in powerlifting:P I’m pretty muscular (I got big biceps, triceps and abs) and I weigh 125. I want to be able to do more pounds and look more buffer…so I want to stop because it’s a complete waste of time…and not only that, my left arm is weaker than my right hand? (I’m a lefty…therefore shouldn’t it be stronger??)
Anyway, should I try the 7 day cycle? (Masturbate every Saturday…so since I weight lift and I’m going to start taking whey protein again…Double the testosterone…double the muscle gain?
)
Or should I stop masturbating completely?
Hi everyone,
Unfortunately, I relapsed after 15 days of no PMO. I saw an attractive girl at work today and came home with the desire to look at pictures. The pictures soon turned into pornographic images and it was all downhill from there. It’s a vicious cycle. From now on, I’m going to stay away from images of any kind (short skirts, etc.). In my opinion, even these seemingly tame images can be just as bad as pornography. It’s better to stay away from them all together. It was a foolish mistake on my part, but I am not going to beat myself up over it. I’ll start again today.
Needless to say, those two weeks brought with them an increase in energy levels (overall and in the pelvic region), somewhat harder erections (although not quite where I would like them to be) and more social. There were days however when I felt irritable and wanted to stay away from social encounters. Overall though, during that time, I felt more personable and flirtatious. I can imagine how I would feel if I go beyond a mere two weeks. Wish me luck as I pick up the pieces and continue on this arduous journey. It’s harder than it first appears to be.
TO RASHAD, how long has it been since you last relapsed?
Guys, after abstaining from orgasm but still masturbating for various lengths of time I decided to quit it. I accidently orgasmed a couple of time plus there were a couple of times where I just wanted to orgasm and did.
So now I’ve gone 44+ days without any masturbation at all whatsoever and it’s going to stay that way. I have even watched really limited porn as a test and listened to moaning videos . I enjoy the harder erections over masturbating now. The advantages outweigh the disadvantages abd there is a difference imo between masturbating and no orgasm vs no masturbating at all. The latter being the better.
And yes as DAVE said, everything can be a temptation. I was looking at motivational videos and somebody posted this incredible video of these gorgeous twins. Immediatly favoured!! I have no fear though that I will masturbate again. I’ve given up masturbation forever.
Just don’t start. It’s easier that way because once you start it becomes much more tempting to keep on going.
Rashad,
Actually I am an avid gym goer, just not as consistent with it as I should be. I build muscle fast, lift heavy, and feel really good about myself afterwords. I’m kind of going back and forth between the physical and highly sexual mode, and the more contemplative almost asexual mode. Really, the feeling of being in love often override my sexual desires. Which is bad if the girl is borderline oversexed (which most girls are, hehe).
At any rate, I messed up my abstinence routine and fell back after 4 days. Then followed a masturbation spree of 3 days, at the end of which my balls reduced in size some. But actually…I think I’m more geared towards ejaculating 1-2 times a week, because my voice got even deeper the day after my first masturbation. My body seems to produce semen rapidly, but this time around I will wait until my testicles feel rock hard, and then a couple of days more to really max out the testosteron production. So, from today, another abstinence period of at least 4, at the most 7 days. If it works well I might try 14 days for my next period. Wish me good luck.
Note to self: Don’t try to resist getting an erection when seeing hot girls or when thinking a naughty thought. If I do resist, this will teach my mind that getting an erection is bad. It’s the frequent masturbating and specifically the ejaculation that’s the problem to combat. So…keep myself busy, look for distractions and…use sheer will power!!!
Dave,
Its been about 3+ weeks since my last relapse. Ive gotten to the point where I have no interest in looking at porn. I really dont. Its weird because the last time I did this my sex drive was through the roof and I ended up relapsing out of frustration, but now it seems to have disappeared. Im still interested in women but porn and beating off isnt my thing anymore.
To Mattias,
Oh ok. Didnt meant or diss you or anything but I just didnt get the gym vibe from your post for some reason. Honestly, you’ll do so much better in the gym now. Whenever I go to the gym and see all those phat booties in those yoga pants it just motivates me to lift harder and fster, HAHA. And since you’ll have that added aggression, testosterone and energy from not jerking off you’ll make even better gains.
To JP,
I feel you man. Ive given it up forever too. Masturbation is the refuge of the lonely man and Im done with it.
If you’ve already been masterbating frequently, I strongly recommend to not drop it completely all of a sudden, unless you are getting sexual pleasure from women.
I had abstained for a whole month and a half after I had previously masterbated frequently – usually around 5-10 times a week. Then I felt like challenging myself to 2 weeks abstinence from masterbation. Of course the first few days were difficult, and after the first week it started to become easier to resist. And I completed 2 weeks, and I barely had the urge to masterbate from then on, so I didn’t.
1 and a half months later… n I decide to follow the tips on this page where you reach your peak after about 7 days abstaining, so I masterbated to begin this phase, and it was quite honestly the least pleasurable wank I have ever had in my entire life!
So if you are going to abstain for long periods of time, I recommend cutting down slowly…. So one week, followed by 2, then 3 if u really want to.
However I only did masterbate again to try and reach the peak as it suggested on here, because hopefully I’ll be quite sensitive by the weekend… Which I need to be
dude , ive never heard such a powerful article before , god bless you , i ve spent years looking for someone , just anybody that shares the same experience and same thoughts about this habbit and its dangerous effects that is some how not shown directly to the minds of people even doctors , people cant really understand how bad this habbit may lead them to through their lives , destroying social life and sexual life and health , semen is the brains food , not only the brain but also the soul , i am really impressed by the chart you shown us , never heard about it before but its reveals a good secret that motivate people to abstain masturbation and try this out to let them know the secret.
Porn used to be cocaine for me. I had 3 subscriptions going on sites, and just kept feeding into it until one day I’d had enough. I felt sick.
When my last girl found out I’d quit masturbating, she put a lot more into our encounters. She would also blatant about having sex several times a night instead of just once like we used to. At a happy hour her coworker joked “Can I borrow him sometime?”
Re: some dude … Haha well done on the surgery videos! One trick for me is I have a folder full of images of cockroaches and cockroach infestations right before my porn folder. Nothing like a vile, disgusting spiny legged cockroach to kill your urge to relapse!
I also make it a point to google “cockroach” every time I have the urge to surf porn on the net. Works like a charm!
Guys…does ‘blowing’ a little bit count as a relapse? For example, I have fun with myself then I stop…but I keep on going because I don’t want to have “blue balls” so I just let out a little bit. Not to the point where the whole load comes out and I feel sleepy/exhausted…no. Just a little bit. Does that ruin my 8 days of abstaining? Does it affect the benefits of not masturbating?
Louie, I believe that does ruin it. Not sure exactly what you mean by “let out a little bit” but if you feel a little bit of “relief” after, means you’ve probably ruined it. The whole point is to let that energy and testosterone circulate within your bloodstream and to channel that all that power through your muscles, mind and confidence. Letting even a “little bit” out seems to defeat the purpose.
I didnt feel relief
by a little bit, I mean a little bit of “juice” came out instead of the whole load :p But alright I’ll try it once more without relapsing a bit:)
I started masturbatin wen i was 15, but i cud remember dt d 1st time i did it was blood which came out. I felt it was so bcos of d presure of my hand. I av had it since dt time everytime in d bath and i wouldnt sleep at nite witout it. I dont av any girl frnd cos i dont even no how 2 engage in a talk wt dem. At a time i tried nt to masturbate but dat eventually resorted into porn movies, which has also always ended with mastyrbation. I decided not to ejaculate wen i tot i was loosing to much of semen by holdin my dick at d time i was feelin to really come.. Does,dat also have effect?…what do i do?
I find the problem is ot masturbation per se but being stimulated by pornographic images rather a tease from your girlfriend or your imagination. It is like I feel I was being cheated b/c my effort was wasted.Whereas with your girlfriend or imagination you can interact ,experiment and learn things rather than being in a zombie mode like when watching porn
Regards
I find the problem is not masturbation per se but being stimulated by pornographic images rather a tease from your girlfriend or your imagination. It is like I feel I was being cheated b/c my effort was wasted.Whereas with your girlfriend or imagination you can interact ,experiment and learn things rather than being in a zombie mode like when watching porn
Regards
There is a lot of documented evidence that excessive masturbation is harmful in many ways and I personally agree. You are more likely to get depressed if you masturbate a lot. The one thing that is not mentioned here is that having sex with a woman and masturbating creates very different results. For me masturbation is primarily a stress reliever. I have found that your body knows when you ejaculate in a woman and there is a sense of contentment that you get from that that is not possible to get from anything else. Even using a condom reduces the effect.
I am in completely agreement with your assessment. A 5-7 days cycle is a good balance.
Personally I have experienced that if I go without wanking for more than 5-7 days, I will relieve myself in a wet dream. May be that was one of the original reasons that after 7 days the testosterone levels fall back.
Oh my god. All of your research is exactly what I thought would happen if I attempted to resist masturbation.
I completely am with you and I have evidences to support this theory. I will give a link later….
in my personal experience, abstaining does help a lot. i abstained from masturbation for 8 days and found that my energy levels have boosted up. i used to be a lousy player in every game. lack of confidence, no performance, stupid moves n all. but beleive me, abstaining has made me better in every game, i run longer, bat good and my bowling is almost perfect. believe me guys abstaining helps.
i am now determined to never masturbate again….
so where do i fit into all of this?.
i am 39 years old; i have cerebral palsy; i’m a virgin;
i masturbate 2 or 3x a week, i dont go out; meet women or any of that; porn helps but im not addicted
Hi guys,
I wanna explain my own experiences,
Actually I don’t have lots of info in medical science but i experienced something which is very amazing.
a few years ago i abstained for more that 3 weeks. in the 3th week i felt that whenever i go the girls are attracted to me and it was very easy to pickup one. even i tried this abstain for my exams and really got good grades. You know, I’m sure that this phenomena gives me more inner energy, so by that I’m more lucky. I’m not sure if I could tell what i want, but i wanna say that in my opinion and according to my experiences keeping away from masturbation gives us more inner energy. in contrast when i masturbate i easily loos my connections with girls. it happened to me several times. As I’m handsome sometimes the girls attracted to me but after making the relationship and as soon as i start masturbating they disappear. I’m sure that there is a relationship between masturbation and Inner energy (Metaphysics).
Does anyone has the same experience?
i still masterbate, wank, jerk but not off! ever since i learned about tantriatic or tantra i can beat my meat reach pleassure without depleting protein which is what semen consist of. at least you learn more than self controlll and will have a very interesting sex life with your partners…..so read up!
19 days so far so some observations:
-less sleep, down from 7.5 to 6 hours a night
-lots more energy/drive. Will get shit done efficiently
-more time and focus, I’ve read more in these last few weeks than in months
-First week was difficult, 2nd week was easy, 3rd week was a bit more difficult than the last
-Morning periods the most difficult in the 2nd-3rd weeks. However, the urge during the day is essentially gone
I have suffered from PE since I started having sex. I think this has had to do with my early experience masturbating. The PE has lead to a lack of confidence in my sex life, lack of sexual drive and overall dissatisfaction with sex and relationships.
I started abstaining last week when I started reading The Enlightened Sex Manual by David Deida. I started reading the book because I decided to do something about the PE. In the book David preaches about achieving orgasm without ejaculation. This is the ultimate goal for me.
After successfully abstaining for 4 days I was feeling really good, full of energy and confident. I would have no problem holding off for a few more days as I was channeling my energy into self improvement specially around the areas of meditation and working out (I am currently doing the Insanity program which is super challenging and takes care of all that extra energy). The problem is that last night I had a wet dream. I woke up feeling bad about it because I really wanted to hold out longer.
So my question is, if you have a wet dream does that count as ejaculating through masturbation? Does that mean that I need to reset the day count and start over at day one?
I’m relying completely on wet dreams, now. I’ve never had one before, since I’ve been masturbating since I was 11. I’m nearly16 now. i usually masturbate 2-3 times a day. I work out fairly rigorously every day. I do have a question. During puberty I have heard that how sexually attractive you are is determined by how much testosterone or estrogen at puberty for males and females, respectively. So if I jerked off three times a day every day during puberty I probably had low testosterone, right? FUCK ME.
To Jake: I masturbated a lot during puberty, and have always felt like a kid that never grew up. I think I have had low testosterone levels due to the fact that I didn’t let my testicles fill up before I ejaculated. As a result my testicles became relatively small. Been using a light testicle stretching program for the last year to make them hang lower (in combination with abstinence 4-7 days at a time) and…well…my beard growth has increased, voice is deeper, and I’m aggressive (in a good way, not afraid of anyone these days no matter their size). I was an idiot to masturbate so much during youth (34 now) and thus deplete my semen. I didn’t have much guidance, was depressed, and didn’t know how to handle girls, so I gave in to the hand.
When I was in school, I once went half a semester without masturbating. I didn’t do much of ANYTHING, actually, because I was REALLY focused trying to maintain a 4.0 GPA. One morning, I looked up from my papers and books and thought I had magical sexual powers like you described. Really, though, it was just my imagination. I was interpreting everything everyone said as a sexual advance. I went around for a few days like this, sweating profusely, flirting with EVERYONE, and on the last day I got an erection that WOULDN’T GO AWAY. I was shaking I was so horny, my clothes were sopping wet with sweat. My pants couldn’t hide it. ALL DAY. I had to go home early. I realized that I hadn’t masturbated since I could remember, so I had a marathon session that night, and my problems went away. This article on Wikipedia describes the psychological symptoms/”sexual powers” I was feeling during those few days very well: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Involuntary_celibacy
Well Tom, I wish I had erections that wouldn’t go away. It’s been years and years since I could get a full erection from just looking at a sexy girl. My mind understands the sexual attraction but my penis doesn’t get the signal unless I look at really wild porn or fantasize about pretty off-the-wall stuff AND stroke. Anyway, I’m on day 4 now (again) and very moody. Woke up with a medium hard-on this morning. Gonna blow off some steam at the gym.
Great post,
30 y/o male here…I have been struggling with wanking since I was introduced to it from the tender age of 8 by a friend. I look back, I spent most of my high school years awkward and shy, even though I was good looking and one of the best athletes around. I went bald very early… although I am genetically predisposed but noone went bald that early in either side. I did manage to get laid a few times here and there after high school, but nothing was satisfactory and i couldn’t cum from sex and would lose erections frequently. I always have been into “esoteric” knowledge, and I came across something that said men should not waste their semen (jing) and it all made sense to me. I quit for a while, met a nice hot girl and we had great sex…. during this time i was magnetic, i evolved from a guy chicks liked as a friend to a stud… much to the dismay of my ex because i did cheat from time to time. I was just reveling in my new found sexual energy that i never allowed to build up.
Unfortunately, I ended up going back to my old ways, and in sync with that, our sex life decreased and eventually we broke up after 4 years. I was crushed… And instead of giving up this habit I just went head on into porn consumption, and with high speed internet, along with a bad coke habit… spiraled out of control with this. My sexual tastes started getting much more specific and “kinky”. Eventually, I got to the point where I get barely an erection even while masterbating… sex was totally out of the question unless i had some viagra or something… then i was a stud but it still didn’t feel right.
Well, 4 years later, here I am depressed, anti social, nothing going for me and living in moms basement. I have decided once in for all to kick this habit, I know it locks me in a negative state. Anytime I’ve ever given up this habit, good things start happening. It’s not a magic cure but I really feel that you give off a different vibe when your “Full” of your manly energies. I have gone the last 5 days without and immediately i can notice my interactions with girls, and guy to be much better. I a mmuch more relaxed, my voice is deeper, the girls seem to go out of their way to talk/flirt with me. I know they found me attractive before… I dress good, look great for my age despite being bald. I just feel a certain magic/sexual power… like i can seduce any woman and it’s great. I think most people that are saying this is bullshit are just so deluded… denial is very powerful.. few people have the power to look deep within their soul and question themselves. Ego is the destroyer of so many people… lose your ego. One of my best friend has potential to be a great musician, but he also is lacking in some areas and anytime i’ve tried to bring this up to him… he goes into denial or kinda does the in one ear, out the other thing. He will most likely not succeed on his own unless he has a major eye opening.
My personal belief is “they”, the powers that be, want a population of docile schmucks and I think that is why masturbation is encouraged so much. Your weird if you DON’T do it… I feel so much more able to take action ALREADY and it’s only been 5 days into my “rebooting” process. I recommend people check out the website- yourbrainonporn.com It is quite enlightening, and explains how this is truly a bad thing to indulge yourself in on a regular basis without religious dogma or eastern mysticism for you scientific/logical types.
Now, I don’t think there is anything wrong with the occasional tug job, IF you’re not getting laid. If you have sexual prospects you shouldn’t even consider it. It’s not a necessity, you aren’t going to get prostate cancer, that’s a bunch of bs. Wet dreams are natures way of “cleaning the pipes” if you’re not getting sex.
It’s crazy how we went from being a totally repressed puritanical society, to a completely depraved wanton society who’s motto is, “if it feels good, do it” Where is the balance??? I think in 10 20 years it’ll become mainstream knowledge that excessive wanking, especially to porn is detrimental to ones well being. Sure, porn has been around for a long time… but never until the last 10-15 years have we been exposed to so much porn. You don’t have to go to the seedy “book store” to get your fix, and even then you’re only able to get so much and it costs a lot…. now you don’t have to pay for it (if you know what your doing) and can be up to your eyeballs in it immediately. That is not natural.
Think about highly successful people that you admire or want to be like. Do you think 2pac sat around beating his meat for hours a day? George Clooney? Leo Messi? No, they most likely channeled that sexual energy into their respective crafts to further themselves along.
Hello guys.
I’ve been wondering about something…
After I start the Reboot ( already did countless times, even though I sometimes manage to hold for days without masturbation ), I find myself waking up in the morning and starting to ( without noticing it myself ) ”hump” the bed I just slept on, dropping some drops of sperm in the process. So, no matter how much or how little the amount of sperm is released, does it count as a relapse?
Does a single drop of sperm count as relapse ( in the context of what I said above ) or doesn’t it ? Because I don’t want to release whatever bit of testosterone I can gather humping the bed x)
Hope you understand my question. English is not my native language so I have certain difficulties expressing myself.
Good luck to all.
Going to relieve myself for the last time today and start rebooting. I’ll leave reports of how it went for those who want some more feedback ( even though the feedback in this forum is enough ).
Cheers!
I came across an article by a Dr. Sayeed Ahmad from India, honestly, I was bewildered by his claims. I had to copy paste this, kindly enlighten on them:
Some of the after-effects of masturbation are :
1. The nervous system is affected the most.
2. Besides the heart, the digestive system, the urinary system as well as the other systems are adversely affected and consequently the whole body becomes the museum of diseases with profound weakness.
3. The eyes become sunken, the cheek bones protrude and there is a black rim round the eyes.
4. Continuous headache and backache.
5. Dizziness and loss of memory.
6. Palpitation of heart on lightest exertion.
7. Nervousness.
8. Unable to perform any heavy physical or mental work.
9. The person dislikes any company and activities and rather likes to sit in seclusion and suffers from weakness.
10. All the senses are impaired.
11. Vision becomes dim, the tongue begins to stammer and ears tend to become deaf etc.
12. Lastly T. B. or insanity or some other serious disease catch hold of the victim to lead his life to a close.
13. Impotency.
You could read the whole article here http://homeoint.org/site/ahmad/masturbation.htm
I’d appreciate if anyone agrees with the article.
I try no to masturbate to much a least onece a week or every 2 week because I lose my energys and the body get used to masturbate and can’t have good sex because of that
I have gone at least a month without ejaculating and can honestly say it makes you workout incredibly intensely. Last night I had sex and had the most mindblowing orgasam I have ever had. I self released before doing the deed to avoid PE, can honestly say the orgasam I had during sex felt almost multiorgasmic it was that powerful. I am about to reboot, as I want to put the energy into my uni study and fitness.
Hey I love this, what Ive done is the 7 day plan, Wanking on the sunday. This means throughout the week It builds up until friday/Saturday when I go out with the mates down town looking for pussy! This got me really motivated to approach girls!
Hi, I’m a newly single man of 40 and abstained for the first time in my adult life for 16 days. I managed to get through the urges by working out the most intensely than I ever had… (almost everyday for at least 1 hour). I kept myself disciplined but gave up on Day 16 as all of a sudden my muscles stared to grow so crazily that I couldn’t even sleep from discomfort and needed something to ‘calm down’ (it was if my ‘blood was boiling’ and would wake up on nights 15 & 16 literally with NIGHTMARES (and I don’t normally remember dreaming anything) — I swear, strangest experience). I suspect it was the excess testorone in my blood — I relapsed for about 5 times over 3 days since to my shame but am about to re-start abstaining again (along with the fitness routine). Without the workouts, I don’t think I can control it. How can you!? Net effect: strange mental experience but I am actually physically bigger and more masculine as a consequence of it. Anyone have similar experience?
Eh, Mr X. I’m turning 35 soon and kind of had a severe age crisis dec-jan, so your experience gives me hope in the workout department! I am on a reboot (as they say on quitting porn sites) and hoping to rewire my brain from extreme kink to getting aroused by just a girl being naked. Yes, porn-induced ED…
I haven’t noticed any shocking changes in physical abilities at the gym. But then again, I haven’t abstained for 16 days yet, and the caffeine-quitting withdrawal symptoms are pretty tough so gym is not an option at this point. Am now on day 5 of abstinence (from porn and masturbation) and moody, plus tired from coffee withdrawal. But flirty! Last night I woke up with a woody that wouldn’t go away. My goal is to be able to get a full erection from just SEEING a sexy girl.
Great article brother… agreed with each and everything you wrote, especially the psychological issues.
Thanks alot
I have read numerous stories about doing this and would have to agree that from experience, you do feel more jacked and verile to the opposite gender. Women start to sense the higher tetesterone levels, I have notised little subtle things in that regard. Have also heard that many spiritualists attribute special powers of enlightenment to going for prolonged periods. Can honestly say it can keep older guys as horny as 18 year olds, seems to be one consequence of it.
@ mr X. I agree with you. The longer I abstain, I start to get REALLY vivid dreams. Almost like, they’re really happening. Not always nightmares, sometimes just random stuff. Ive also DEFINITELY noticed increased size and strength to the point where I can wow people at the gym. I also tend to be a little more successful with women. Energy levels and overall mood are alot higher as well. The only downfalls I can think of, are that Im alot more wreckless and its tougher to lose weight when in cutting phase of workouts.
Thxs to for the replies (didnt’ expect so many so quickly!) Been guilty of frequent re-lapse sinces breaking at Day 16 — haven’t been really able to re-start again yet. I need to relax somehow! Still working out though, but with slightly less stamina. @ Mattias, my experience in Days 12+ or so, I’d swear I could literally cum if I TRIED TO THINK HARD ABOUT IT (especially in the mornings).
I was working out before this experiment but only 1 or 2 times a week. It was intensity level and endurance that changed for me. Abstaining seems to help in these categories as you it makes you a ‘raging bull’ with no release…
With women, slight improvement but become more aggressive with staff in office (I happen to be a manager). Abstaining not suitable if you need to sit down and do writing tasks either…
My conclusion is that holding it back — combined with rigorous exercise — rockets up the fire (i.e. testosterone) in the blood, leading you to higher physical energy levels but mentally makes you more edgy. I understand why athletes tend to be poor students…
Haha Mr X. Actually, many athletes do great in school, at least in my country. But the more intense their training is, the less time they have for school, I guess.
I am taking mental notes. Your gym story is encouraging. I just had bad caffeine withdrawal pains (and fell back), and got a chest muscle inflammation last weekend. Bringing me down, but your post is getting me psyched again, now that the chest pain is subsiding!
Update: After over a week of abstinence from porn and masturbation I got worried. My libido was fine, but my erections only occured at night. So I did a little mild stroking with one finger and one thumb, and thought of a naked girl. Nothing. I added some kink and got an erection. It wasn’t quick to answer but when it was up it stayed longer than usual, without stimulation.
@Mattias, how old are you and what country are you referring to?
The caffeine issue of yours is something I cannot relate to and have never experienced. How much coffee/cola have you been drinking!
PS I work in a nerdy, white-collar office and no one looks particularly atheltic…I look like a big time bodybuilder compared with the other men.
I don’t think I’ve ever made it past day 7 mark. Well, apart from phase when I was intensely reaching towards my physical goals, and felt like this would compromise it. After a good good let off, I need a couple of days to regenerate, and then it just feels like the part between my brain and skull is filled with semen, not even talking about my little brain.
Mr X, I’m turning 35 very soon. Born, raised and living in Sweden, Scandinavia. Athletic people tend to be achievers, and that sometimes carries over to education. They are also disciplined.
Coffee. I’m inconsistent with most things. Some days my intake is zero cups, some days 4 cups. I quit last year without headaches. This time around it was gruesome.
Thoughts: I don’t think it’s advisable to go for months without ejaculation and sex. At least once a week should be minimum. As for me, I have desensitized my brain through porn, and my penis through masturbation. Arousal is now rare. So for people like me I suggest 100% abstinence for as long as possible, to regain sensation to the penis, and to lower expectations in the bedroom, from your visually fed idea of sex to a more realistic togetherness.
nice article. very useful. keep it up!!!
Hey all. 27 Here.
I have consistently masturbated since I was about 12 years old. That makes about 15 years. Society never warned about the dangers of masturbation. Everytime in the past, when I wondered if it was affecting my motivation and energy levels, I would always come across stupid f**cking Bullsh1t websites that encouraged masturbating. In fact, I have NEVER found a website that discouraged masturbating recently. Seems western medicine LOVES and encourages masturabtion.
I was a shy guy and have always had social anxiety my entire life. (Go figure) – I was O-K with girls, and I got my first girlfriend in HS. She was a 6, not really hot or pretty but we had lots of sexual acitivity. I continued my masturbation and had somewhat ok relations with women off and on. I was always active and tried to work out. I read about women through David Deangelo and figured out how to attract them. Despite being able to attract women, and a few hot ones, (and ugly ones) – Ive had a few sexual episode here and there, and never considers myself bad with women.
I have always been a shy, insecure person though. I would mask my insecurity with an act. I never was a natural or felt comfortable in social situations. Very rarely. did i ever think it was my masturbation putting me off? No. One time We took a family trip to mexico. It was a week, and i noticed that i had lots of energy to do things, despite getting up early and having regular sleep patterns. (ive had irregular sleep patterns my entire life). I realize that I wasn’t masturbating that week.
Growing up I was always told I was forgetful and spacey. My family thinks there is something wrong with me. I know I am an intelligent person who is capable of amazing things. I just don’t understand why I am not as motivated and dont’ have the extra “umph” most men and people my age had.
Well starting today, I think I’ve figured it out.
Despite being decent with women, and having a relationship with a cougar at 21. I always felt self-concious, and insecure, but I always covered it up. I never had the “Drive” and “Ambition” everyone around me had. What were they doing that I didn’t? I just realized maybe my daily masturbation was stealing my energy. I had always suspected it but never came across anything to confirm it. So I continued to masturbate daily in my youth.
Now I am 27. Thank God, I still have the sex drive of a 20 year old. I can get my dick hard on command. I can ejeculate multiple times a day. This past year, 26, I have never been so depressed, and never have ejaculated so much in my life. You would think I would put 2 and 2 together, huh? Starting today, I am going to Damn the Well of my life force. I am going to perserve my life force and live life again. I will be at my full potential.
I also want to talk about something else. Although I have masturbated daily for the past 16 years, it has kept me in a semi-depressed state, and put me back in the ambition department. Many people I know do well in school. ect. I could never concentrate, even when I went to college at age 25 (2 years ago) – I was having extreme trouble remembering everything.
I have read many self help books, and none have touched on this subject. Only one. Napoelon Hill in “Think and Grow Rich” which someone else mentioned earlier. This was very importnatn but I did not realize how importnant. If we are vibrational beings, and the highest vibration possible, is to abstain from sex, then that what must be the key to high energy and high spirituality is.
I have just read that Semen is our life force of the bones. Now if we preserve our semen, how powerful can we be? I am very interested in attempting this. It’s not a matter of wanting to stop. Stopping is easy, it was a matter of “Not caring to.” – I never thought it was a problem. I never thought it was actually hindering the life-force, energy, motivation, and inner-will power of my spirit. You tell me now, do we not live in a crazy society?
Should we not share this knowledge with everone? Masturbation is even encouraged in SEx-ED! We should also be tought the dangers of not preserving our very valuable life force. What a hard lesson I am learning, at Age 27. But I know life is not over. We maintain our sex drives, and in that instance, when we well the damn, and preserve our life force, we are able to achieve maximum power. Just as Napoleon hill said.
I have experimented with many forms of mediation. I have been able to manipulate my own dreams. I am excited to see how vivid and powerful my new dreams will be once I am connected to the life force. This is what they talk about when they say, we are all part of the same energy. Those of us with Low energy are the ones who spend it daily! I just realized that! When you have nostalgic dreams of romance, and your childhood, and you have a vivid dream; (the type of dream released from taking the chemical St. Johns Wort)
(St. Johns wort is an herbal remedy for happiness) – those dreams are you having a high life force; a saved sperm, and sexual energy! those are true power! that binds and connectes you to the human race. How many years Ive wasted by wasting my own power on senseless junk, and filth, and porn for so many years! i wish you all energy, peace, and blessing for the future. Let us heal our bodies, our energies, and most importantly, let us heal our souls! -Love
Raw food too is extremely important, sleep, sunlight and postive thought.
I’m now in Day 2 and off (no pun intended) to see if I can beat (again, no pun intended) a 16-day personal record.
I would like to share my own story of abstinence. Today is my 25th day of abstinence and i feel like i am burning, and if i touch a girl it would set her on fire, and drive her mad..
I started this experiment of mine as to test my will power and to boost my motivation to go out and date women. Before i started this, i was, as everyone that stated above, depresed,and had no will to even live even thought of ending my own life litteraly. In this perion i only stayed at home and when i got bored i masturbated(at least 3 times a day). From now on when i finish my 40 days of abstinence i will, abstinate for about a week or two, and if i dont have a female partner with me to have sex with i will masturbate, just to empty the gun, and then continue again the same cycle. When i started to abstinate i immediatly felt a change in my mood and will so i recomend abstinating for at least a few days.Thank you Matt Savage for writing this post and everyone that subscribed, and thank you if you liked mine 
JP, that sounds a lot like the recipe for wellbeing as promoted by Dr Lorraine Day. I will start switching my high meat intake to more raw veggy food, little by little. For longevity.
TheCiscoKid, you seem to have had a more accomplished life than I’ve had so far. Stay away from all that spiritual quackery though. Most of it is bull.
Mr X, so you fell back too? Remember, it’s not the “release” that’s the problem most of the time. In fact I had a crazy shift towards darker voice and higher beard growth rate after my recent releases. Just need breaks. For me, it’s a combo of emotional baggage, too frequent masturbation, and too many kinks that’s causing my problems.
I’m now in Day 4 and it seems to be getting easier! (big-time, tempting hard-ons in the morning though, which is in any case a good sign of health).
To keep disciplined, I’m now learning that you HAVE TO WORK OUT in tandem to ‘release’ your pent-up essence into your own muscles rather than flushing it literally down the toilet….(if you think of it, what a waste of your ‘life force’
)
If you are familiar with energy supplements such as NOExplode, abstinence gives you that extra boost when working-out and the ability to repair and build more quickly.
Frankly, it would be more pleasurable to have regular sex but if the right woman isn’t around, I’d recommend utilising your essence to the more productive purpose of improving and healing your own body rather than blowing it in some tissue paper…
Went to the gym tonight and had a great workout, while I was louded with pre workout, like double my normal dosage, felt awesome. I have been abstaining for a while although I had sex a few times last week. Tonight I was so amped at the gym I imagined I half shot my loud. Actually I am quite certain I did. Is this normal?
Sometimes I have a hard time getting erections, even if I’m getting a blowjob or looking at a really hot girl. Is this because of over-fapping? Anyone have any experience with this?
i’ve been trying everything with the goal to have sex with women. i realized early on that testosterone played a major role. so, i did figure out plenty of way to increase T through supplements. (tongkat ali, dhea, HCG, tribulus) honestly, they all do work. i can tell after taking them that women are attracted to me a bit more. when i walk by, they lick their lips and look at me. women bounce their breasts when i get in proximity. or, they flick their hair to get my attention. women are usually attracted to my looks, but since my looks are strong i am guessing my estrogen is naturally high.
anyways, after taking all these supplements, my libido increased drastically. but i wasted it all on masturbation. especially after HCG, my libido went through the roof. i was waking up in the middle of the night to masturbate. but because of the over-masturbation, i believe my immune system lowered and caused me to get sick. i am sick right now.
i’m really thankful you wrote this article. i am going to try to abstain. i might not even need all these supplements if i just abstained. i have a feeling my abstinence plus supplements might be too much testosterone. so i might in the end, cut down on the supplements.
i seem to have the ability to attract women initially, just based on my looks and by testosterone energy via supplements. but, i don’t have that extra something to take it to the next level. maybe my decades of masturbating daily has depleted me of my natural drive and instincts to properly react to women.
hopefully abstaining will change this.
my initial goal is to abstain for 7 days as suggested.
but later on, i want to abstain to the point where the only times i ejaculate without real sex is through nocturnal emission. i remember wet dreams being the best experience ever. i haven’t had that in a long time.
How’s this for a theory — abstinence ends up giving off hormonal signals that you are a harmless ‘gay’, keeping in mind that women are ironically comfortable and attracted to gay men…
The 7th day pop in T is probably causing the unbearable attraction.
I don’t think it’s a gay vibe. It’s a tank is full and biologically and physically necessary to unload vibe. Once the primitive vibe is put out its probably the female’s instinctive duty to attempt to be the one that is chosen to be unloaded into.
Does anyone think this is just a placebo effect?
@Daniel LA — your theory sounds very good too…I was thinking also how some women go for good-looking young priests who are celibate for some reason (or just coincidence)…the thing with gays could also be more limited to gays “who are in denial” so aren’t really doing anything with anybody (or even themselves) & have T-build-up as well…
The studies cited with the 7 day cycle aren’t that strong though — we’re not rats for god’s sake! I have no idea otherwise what is the ideal peak cycle (or could it build-up ad infinitum? ;0)
@ Steve-O, I don’t think there is a placebo effect as I’m definitely feeling something different…
PS “Day 7″ and counting — fought off strong temptation this morning and aiming to go beyond the 7-day rule & beat 16-day personal adult lifetime record! Planning mega-marathon work-out tomorrow to absorb “the juices” internally rather than externally. Seems easier to sustain second time around (did 16 days first half of February) Might however have the opportunity later this week to unload with a real women though (which would be nice but mess up this self-experiment)
I think this theory is true. I found that refraining from masturbation puts a twinkle in your eye that females find attractive. Its almost like they can sense it. It’s like your testosterone radiates around you. I’ve had way better luck with women I find if your not choking your chicken all the time.
ok, i think i’m on day 5ish. i didn’t jerk for 4 days. today, i thought it would be ok just as long as i don’t ejaculate. i just couldn’t take it anymore. i had seen too many hot girls past few days. but, from today’s jerk session i realized something. background.. i usually don’t just jerk with my hand motion, i sort of pump into my fist. the 4 days of jizz being accumulated does something to the vigor of the cock pumps. it feels like the pumps are coming from the root of my balls and there is power behind it. maybe it’s the built up testosterone. maybe girls instinctively know that… if this guy fucks me now, it’s gonna be a good lay. they know there will be power being the pumps. the cock will reach deeper and harder bc the T is built up in the balls. they instinctively intuit that there will be vigor, they know there will be a big load, and instinctively they know that the best chance for fertility, create a child is near at day 7 and beyond. if you jerk off everyday.. you are basically forfeiting this chance for women to feel this instinctive attraction.
ps: sorry for the TMI. lol
Naw Dan, that was a great laugh, I know what you mean, yesterday was supposed to be my 7th day, I failed, today I start again haha
Yea I just fucked up too I lasted 5 days. There was atleast 3 interactions with women with breasts hanging out. There is no way I cannot ejaculate to those stored images. Maybe jerking even if not ejaculating is a no no. There is just too much temptation to unload.
Been going to the gym a lot the past 6 months. Made some gains. The muscles started showing a bit but I still looked and acted basically the same. Thought about abstaining for a while. After beatin’ one out then reading this last Wednesday I decided to give it a try. Yesterday on day 5, I noticed the energy level was way up. Probably a combination of being free of the need and having the extra testosterone. Oh yeah, and knowing the next time a girl gets it, she’ll get it good. That feels good to have that piece of info in the head even if you’re tired and having a bad day.
Yesterday in the weight room I tossed around more weights than usual. Didn’t lift near any records but defiantly had energy to stay and do more. At night I remember how connected I felt to every muscle in my body, even the ones I hadn’t worked out. I remember going to bed just feeling good and not worrying about a damn thing! Sometimes I have way too much on my mind.
Today I woke up and had the biggest biceps I have ever seen on me! Went to my department to work wearing a slimmer than usual shirt. I took a break and just hung out pretty confidently not thinking about anything but a stupid game on my phone. Suddenly this cute girl I know who is usually too shy to begin conversations and often disinterested in talking to me anyways, comes up and starts talking to me. What?! That’s the second time a girl has come up to me this week at my department alone! Women come up to me almost never, anywhere. Can’t wait to go out at night feelin this good.
I read this forum a couple of months ago and decided to give the theory a shot. I must say it wasn’t easy at first but I’ve gotten to the point where I can go for weeks at a time without ejaculating. However this doesn’t mean I don’t masturbate. I figured that as long as I am going to experiment I might as well go all the way. So I picked up a book on becoming Male Multiple Orgasms. Essentially learning how to have multiple orgasms without ejaculating.
Check out the book, it’s a quick read, and follow the exercises. You’ll be surprised how much you learn, and how much your sex life will improve: http://www.amazon.com/Multi-Orgasmic-Man-Sexual-Secrets-Should/dp/0062513362
I love you (this)! Thank-you for being so open and objective. What about women, I wonder?
Masturbation without ejaculation is something we at OnaniaSupport call Edging. I myself don’t edge but most of my other penis stroking bretheren prefer to deprive themselves of cumming for long periods of time because they believe it provides them the best long awaited orgasm when they finaly allow thenselves to ejaculate. I still believe that the penis is definately the epotme genital of masturbation although they have advertised masturbation toys for women.
There are many periods of ebb and flow of society’s preference to encorage sexual partnering and times solosexualizing and the occlusion of both.
I let go on Day 8 and met up with an athletic ‘heavy metal’-style chick many years from junior and did her twice big-time literally without breaking a sweat!
Although tempting, masturbation is self-destructive, a total waste, and should only be used in emergenices! (maximum once a week if you can’t hold it anymore) Saving it for the real-thing is absolutely great! (BUT ONLY WORKS IF YOU WORK-OUT WHILE ABSTAINING)
I’m now ‘re-setting’ myself for another 7 days (actually, I’m starting to agree with this time-cycle)…
@ Daniel LA — being in LA (I assume), you see a lot of female skin — I’m in a rainy northern European city with few hot chicks that are usually covered up anyways. I do find, however, that while abstaining I find that looking at soft nudes helps me relax but I don’t act upon them at all. I’m not into this ‘edging’ business either — all or nothing for me.
@ Randy : I agree totally with your observations and your experience only re-confirms my own.
Well I agree with Matt Savage. I totally agree, coz I myself have been into phase of abstinence, and have been successful with women more than I dreamt. And even when you masturbate in 10-12 dyas you feel strong, vital, full of energy and mostly your concentration power is great. I further suggest to all people reading this, that self pleasure without orgasming( sounds tough) is even a great way to pleasure without having the harmful effects of masturbation. If one can pleasure by his hand or a pillow, whichever way one does, and go to the last pont and stop, that will be a great practice. I call it the start and stop method. do try it once.
I am on 16 days so far,however I notice no difference.Did not feel anything different either on day seven when testosterone levels are supposed to go up.Maybe I got low testosterone?I am 20 years old.I’ve been wasting my seed daily since I was like 15 years old,so I think this quitting porn/masturbation would help me tremendeously.
I see you guys getting positive results like after 1 week.I’m on 16 days and still nothing,should I keep going?
I am about to read “Way of the Superior Male” by David Deida, which is virtually about abstaining or using your sex energy productively. Very few studies have been done on this topic and it is something which is kind of seldom spoken about openly, however there are a number of people who can vouch for the effectiveness of abstaining. I know it works I have gone close to 2 months and feel awesome.
Did someone mention that this has benefits other than just attracting women – like does it improve you socially, etc?
Hey Rob. 16 days is a little over-the-top if you ask me. I want to wait until my testicles are harder and then a few days more. To max out the potential and make the pressure build up inside for further capacity. I haven’t done any scientific studies, I tend to just go with experience and logic. I think there’s a limit to how much semen the testicles can contain, and sooner or later you’re going to have to release to maintain a high production rate. I’d say 10 days maximum, and then release with a girl (not on your own) if you’re that lucky.
I’m in a new cycle, day 5 or 6 of abstinence, and boy am I getting efficient. I am also brash and ruthless, but that’s just masculine. Real men trample on someone’s toes once in a while. That’s okay. It’s a win-win situation. It toughens up both.
I stutter at times normally, and it’s been a little worse than usual, because even if I like these rough edges in my personality, these traits clash with my intention to be friendly and easy-going. Hence the nervousness.
@Steve-O. You get a more relaxed attitude, as if nothing fazes you, and that self-assurance is liked by others, so it does help socially. But my suggestion is that you stay away from beating it to porn even if you don’t release. The porn is going to hinder your communication and social skills.
I am starting on a new cycle myself. There is no doubt that you get far stronger IOIs from women. For me holding out more than a month is difficult. I think that works pretty well for me.
awesome article. I’m on day three now. I’ll post back with results later in the week
Hi! I read this article couple of months ago, found it very interesting. Things made sense. But since my dickens has been ruling over my other brain so strongly since my teens (i’m 25 now), i could not manage to go beyond 4 days. It was torture doing it. Some unintentional rubbing over the sheets and i was done.
I consider myself very attractive. I do not have problem getting girls, but i lack motivation and feel a bit depressed at times.
Well this time im trying the cycle again. Somehow, ive managed till day 12. :p And let me tell you, my first week was EPIC! Lol not because i’ve had tonnes of pussy in my bed everynight, but, my take on things has been entirely different! Day to day things seem interesting. I’m focused, interested. Yes, after day 4, i felt the urge to go out look for a honey. I think the whole sensation for me peaked on day 6. That night, I was up 3am, out of breath, and found dickens choking/vibrating/struggling/convulsing like crazy! It was making me twitch all over! I was having spasms which continued over three whole minutes! Head was spinning left to right! Felt like lavajizz was exploding out! Was very certain i was wetting things but it felt soo good! I have never felt such a sensation before!! maybe it was a lucid dream about to happen, but since i’ve never had one before, i cant say for sure! First thing i remember was my heart pounding like retardedly crazy which got me up. After about five minutes, i checked things and surprisingly, it was pretty dry down there. I went to the bathroom, washed my face, lit a cig, looking in the mirror. Still catching on breath, throat was really dry, dickens felt like a stranger, and for some reason, my body was yelling at me” GET ME A FUCKIN CHICK RIGHT NOW OR ELSE!” (in the am). left the bathroom, tried to embrace the entire happening, and went to sleep feeling exhausted.
Now day12 explains the fact that i’m trying to aim for my first ever wet dream.
Okay my interests are not just to hookup. My last relationship was horrible, the girl was a control freak and was a pure one from the selfish breed you call slutty bitches! Been a while since then and I want to have nothing like that. I think i’m still the same, dont want any random hookups, some feelings need to exist before anything happens.
On day 8, a friend of mine was getting some friends together. It was a lunch thing. It was me, two other buddies, a chick buddy, and a chick i had not met before. She was 8/10, (retty hot). We all got in my car, drove around for a bit, picked a spot and went in. Now in that time, the unknown girl was introduced. I had heard about her. She was in a relationship already and was going well with her guy. So she turned out to be another buddy chick. But as i sat next to her during lunch, coffee, brownies, etc,.. turned out dickens didn’t agree all the time. I was having an awesome time with my mates, Cracking jokes and all! There was confidence and energy in me i had not felt much before.
And chicks, well there were like 6-8 different girls over there that kept checking me out constantly, passing smiles, fiddling with their hair. Their body language told me they wanted to be with me. Including this new chick sitting next to me. An hour in and she couldn’t get her eyes off. Dickens liked this girl, he kept stretching whenever i caught this girl staring at me to my face. Lol! And i was very comfortable with it. I’ve NEVER felt so comfortable when friends, possible babes, boner and humor is all put together at the same time. Add to that, there was one girl across one table that i assessed to be the hottest. She was sitting with apparently her fiance. My men, this girl was a 10! And she was one of those checking me out aswell, and rather alot. She was staring at me more than the guy she was sitting next to! A little older than me probably, but she was the thing! For the longest term in my life, I kept my stare locked to this girl as she stared back at me. I felt calm, and king. Both me and dickens admired her beauty as she looked over. Her eyes told me she wanted to be with me instead of the guy she was with. Im not trying to be rude, i respect women, They were all lovely, but i didn’t hook up with anyone that day because that was not my primary motive, instead i was being amazed how well my week was going.
I’ll continue this later. Day 12 going strong
@MRX
i don’t think i’ve gotten over 4 days yet… today i was on a day 3… i went to venice beach and did my usual walk. i noticed one vendor lady sitting on the boardwalk she was sort to leaning over and showed some cleavage when i was walking by. i thought maybe it was just coincidence so i didn’t think much of it. that kind of thing is pretty common. but, on the way back, i noticed her ass and was just looking at it. all of a sudden she got on all fours lifted her ass up, then put both hands on both butt cheeks and acted like she was spreading her cheek open. unfortunately she was wearing jeans.
also at 24 hr fitness today, i was doing the leg curls then i saw a lady starting to bite her fingers. i didn’t think much of it, then she started to stick it in her mouth and licked her finger in her mouth. i thought ok, maybe she is just doing that randomly. then, she put her hands under her sweater jacket and started fondling her right breast. i dunno if it was for me or not, but that was 2 really sexual things going on there, that is out of the ordinary.
oh yea, and yesterday i went out to the mall with a friend… 2 girls were walking by i was looking at one of them. she didn’t quite look at me, but i heard her say F*CK ME when i was just about to walk by.
if this is day 3, im afraid to see day 7.
god bless abstinence.
the end of day four for me. this morning an 8 messaged me on okcupid and later i was reblogged by this girl i’ve been in love with since college (9 years).
tomorrow it is my hope that Alison Brie mistakenly text me for a date at the local diner and 1954 Grace Kelly shows up to borrow my shower.
Day3 fail. I need to delete some urls off my browser.
i’m so glad i found this website, i will be reading these comments every night to help me stop. Also, i will update you in a week.
You guys are very motivating, that is for certain!
I completed one month of abstinence,I noticed no difference at all,no increased confidence,no increased motivation to meet women,no increased attention from women like you guys write here.Eventually yesterday I said fuck it,and busted one.
I thought this will help me because I used to be a daily fapper.I can’t understand how you guys get confident and things like that from this.I envy all of you.Maybe you guys are good at placeboing this no fap=increased confidence.Sorry about sounding so skeptical
Hey Rob….
Just my opinion but for some, I think this abstinence’s increase in T maybe enough to potentiate or maximize their intrinsic attractiveness. If they are good looking, healthy, attractive to begin with the T just maximizes their potential. It’s like adding tabasco sauce to a steak, it spices things up a little. If they are hot to begin with the T just accentuates that hotness and it builds into higher confidence and the women can feel that.
I don’t think the T increase is enough if there are some basic flaws or basic attractive features are missing. By this I don’t mean just looks. I have seen ugly dudes with some hot women. But all of them have something similar:
The most basic feature that can be worked on by anyone is … the posture. You wouldn’t believe how basic and necessary this is. The good posture will actually increase your confidence as much as abstinence imo. but, honestly, good posture is not easy. because when you have good posture you are basically challenging all the alphas in a given area. It’s easy to just cower into bad posture if you get scared. But usually, the person with the best posture is the most attractive in any given area. It shows that they aren’t afraid of anyone and they are basically feared by most betas. Good posture seems easy, but it’s as hard as abstinence. It’s a good place to start to start building basic alpha skills. Try walking around with the best posture possible, see how hard it is when you are near a gangster type or biker gang or football player or mma type. If you can’t overpower them with your posture. You’re basically still a beta. If you can put fear into those types with no problems, the women will start getting attracted to you without doing anything. Because basically, you are the boldest, bravest person around in that given area. if you were a woman, wouldn’t you want to chose the bravest one in the group?
But anyways, I can’t even get past day 3 on the non-fappage so i guess i don’t have a right to lecture about anything. I’m really good with initial attraction, but still working on building a good connection and closing the deal. Lots more to learn about this subject and I really won’t stop until I become really attractive inside and out. Good luck!!!
ps: if you successfully start walking around with good posture… you’ll start feeling a momentum of confidence that matches your body movement. i believe some call it swagger.
Rob, bro, use some logic, women are not gonna appear from thin air. To put it in simple words, When you fap, you use it as a way to release your sexual energy. When you do it often, you start relying on it. When you orgasm, your brain uses some of your endorphins to pleasure you. When you fap often, their level tends to deplete and when that happens, your brain chemistry has changed and you tend to stay in a weary mood/state.
Lets compare it to not fapping.
These are few of the factual things that WILL happen to you.
I am new to this thing but it makes total sense to me right now, and for me, it is working. I do not expect pussy to appear under my pillow if i dont fap.
Maybe you’re not putting your built up energy to the right use? Because at the rate i’m seeing change, apart from women alone, i cant imagine where i’ll be in a month. I’ve done gardening (like growing things from seeds), some weird shopping for myself (including grooming stuff etc), cleaned up/rearranged my room which i would never do ,etc, all within the last week.
I do believe that 10 days should be the average duration between faps if you desire to do so, for medical reasons and obviously, you start losing sexual desire much later after that. And your sperm stays fresh (damaged leaves, new is formed). These are facts nothing from the fiction. Now pheromones and things, i do not believe in literally, but maybe you start putting out better vibes about yourself when you’re naturally feeling good. Think about that?
I say give it another shot and this time, go with 7-10 days. Not a month, 7-10 days. I hope this works for you in some way too buddy
Daniel,
Nice points you’ve raised sir
Rob, I don’t know why it didn’t work for you, and it does seem like an excuse + if you don’t get out there, as somebody said, miracles won’t happen.
I did 10 on my 1st try, and now proceeding to beat my PR (haha), because I can see how it works. There is also my hypothesis that it might not really increase your attractiveness in itself, but your ability to read signs and messages from chicks.
Good luck.
excuse me if this is excessive posting.. but i remembered a few things. this maybe pushing it into the esoteric realm of things.. but the level of T you have dictates the sexual circumstances and situations you attract. for instance on my last try, a couple weeks ago… i think i went as high as the 5th day.. when i went to the beach that day i sware most of the women i saw were 8 9 10s. when many of that calibur come into your sphere you start to notice that it’s not an ordinary day. there was a gangster type oldie car in front of me the guy was an alpha 9ish,10 and his gf was a 10 for sure. cameras rolled up and started filming them in some kind of venice beach documentary. ok, traffic moved on and then this one car full of girls just passed me by and got in front of my car. i was just wondering how the girls looked and just felt curious. then the girl in the passenger seat put her hands out and started doing this weird motion with her right hand. it almost looked like she was grabbing balls and caressing it. i was like, that can’t be for me. it would be cool if it was… then, the driver actually started doing the same thing.. its like they are caressing and cup holding imaginary ballsacs while their car was moving. i wasn’t exactly sure what that was… but i left it alone. the car moved out of the way and now the gangster car was in front of me again. then i saw a cute girl on the street and checked her out. she did this thing with her tongue into her cheek thing, kinda like a imitation blowjob. her bf was walking with her, but she did it pretty slickly so he won’t notice. i actually get this tongue into the cheek imitation blowjob alot.. even from my manager at work. she has a bf too but i think they just cant help it when the T is high. anyways, after i looked away from the cute girl on the street, i looked back at the gangster car… now, the 10 in the passenger seat put her hands out of the window and started to do the caressing ballsac motion… but i think the 10 alpha male was pretty intelligent so he caught on what was going on quick, so she pulled her hand in real fast. anyways… when the T is high, weird shit starts happening to the point of where it’s in a spiritual realm of sexuality. i cannot really put it into better words.
so in summary, the level of T one has coupled with attractiveness and some kind of spiritual/astrological luck creates sexual, pleasurable experiences without much effort. maybe it’s some kind of karma of sorts. who knows.
like people like Hugh Hefner… he must have figured out something major to be able to be around the hottest women all the time. I wonder if one day I can figure out what he knows and duplicate his success. I guess it is up to the stars and destiny to a major degree.
it might really be me just thinking too far into things, but seems like they are legit occurrences. really disregard this message if you think it’s all make up, i can understand why one would feel that way. as i cannot believe it when these things are happening either.
DetailingGuy. Man, wish I could put it as eloquently and to the point as you do. Your posts are inspirational. And I need that because I have failed a lot lately…
Hahaha. @Daniel. That’s the craziest story here so far. But maybe, just maybe, these outlandish surreal sexual innuendos happen around us all the time, but our senses and abilities to perceive our surroundings are enhanced during a “drought”.
I recognize that there is legitimacy to astrology too. In the long run though, I think it’s damaging for the psyche. I experienced that before I became a Christian. As a Christian, I believe in a spirit world and I can’t help but think that these blatant innuendos, behaviours and looks that might be more frequent during abstinence are manifestations of spirits, urging you to sleep around with these sluts and/or rebound to masturbation. I don’t think it’s right, under any circumstances, to flirt provocatively with girls who are spoken for.
I believe there are spirits who try to lure you back into masturbation. And these spirits find a very accessible vessel in the typical slut, who starts flirting with you. We’ve all experienced how we all of a sudden become attractive to random women after we have entered into a relationship, right? You never became more attractive, that’s just the dark forces trying to pull you out and down again.
Mattias, stop.
Hey eveyone! I’m glad that there is still a good deal of discussion going on in the comments of this post particularly considering how long ago I wrote this article, but it has certainly helped to spark not only discussions of the issue here but all over the Internet with this article consistently being linked to by the hundreds from those very discussions. It’s definitely an issue that is gaining a lot of notice.
Also, I definitely want to keep encouraging people to consider the abstinence/no-fap/porn-free experiments for whatever you might think it’s worth in attempting to improve your lives and sharing your observations and findings so that we may all learn.
However, there is one thing that I don’t want muddying up the discussion on this particular topic and that is comments dealing with religion, spirituality and faith. And while my own methods aren’t exactly the most scientifically controlled and do rely quite a bit on anecdotal evidence, I try my best to follow a rational, logical process for figuring out whether or not an idea/hypothesis is most likely to be true or most likely to be false. And this process simply does not work on a spiritual or faith based level since those concepts provide no demonstrable support for the discussion at hand. So please, try to keep comments both civil and rational while leaving out arguments that rely on leaps of faith.
With that being said, I’m now going to edit the original article to change the instances of the word “Theory” to “Hypothesis” since that’s what it is, because unfortunately we are still lacking a lot of good experimentation and results on this topic.
I’d hate to be someone who contributes to the belief that real theories like evolution and gravity have no validity simply because I’m touting my no-fap experiment as some grand scientific break-through
Anyways, thanks again to everyone who’s been sharing quality rational information and experiences regarding this issue. Stay tuned for some new articles coming soon.
nice Matt, very good points. i think whenever things don’t make sense or seem too good to be true i attach some kind of spiritual explanation to make it acceptable in my mind. maybe abstinence really does create such magnificent gains, right there, straight in reality.
looking forward to new articles!
I was thinking about it and I think I need to “rest” more than a month.
Since I was 15 years old I used to fap to porn 1 or 2 times daily.Have to say,before I didn’t know anything about porn,I used to be outgoing.Going to discos,chilling with friends,talking to them wasn’t an issue at all.Then when the internet came,that’s when I discovered porn.”Suddenly” I started to hang out less,staying inside home,was afraid to go out.I did not know what happened to me.
I am 20 years old now,and in those previous 5 years,I was fapping to porn 1-2 times a day. I think I was addicted to it,I can’t really tell. Society made it appear so normal to watch porn,so I thought it’s not really a problem.Oh boy,how wrong I was.
Since I quitted porn 3 months ago,I am flatlining.I mean,I got no sex drive at all,no interest in women,no excitement when seeing women.They say it’s normal to experience this phase when quitting porn.
I’m giving it more time to “heal” my brain,and we’ll see what will happen.
Masturbation is not that big of a problem by its own. The real problem lies with porn, and masturbation is usually associated with porn usage.
Fortunately, more and more people realize how bad porn really is. About every 1 in 4 male has porn addiction problems in the U.S..
The younger generation is getting destroyed by pornography. Porn basically fries one’s reward circuit in the brain. It overload your brain to the point that you can’t even get a boner when you are facing a real woman.
evil masturbation spirits? really? it’s 2012 for Jesus’ sake. as far as dopamine, testosterone and pheromones, self gratification, you are all right. everybody is different. we all want to feel good, sex is one way. food, drugs, alcohol, nicotine, caffeine, even religion. pot and sex are my addictions of choice. Rob, i have felt the same several times, you will get over this. i have found proper diet plays a really big part in this as well. our body is a big chemical, electrical machine, you created a chemical imbalance is all. pheromones play a big part as mentioned, and we, through the media, have been conditioned to think our “smell” is bad. aerosol air fresheners, scented detergents, soaps, lotions, dryer sheets, anti-antiperspirants, deodorants. if you eat whole natural foods you smell better. i’m 54 now and thought i needed to see a doctor and get viagra, or maybe i’m having another flat spot, like you Rob, and i was really concerned as my lady was laying on top of me and nothing was happening. so i thought about pheromones and let go of the media propagated notion that my woman stinks as well as all of the religious dogma that sex is dirty and sinful and buried my face in her armpit. she doesn’t shave as i like the whole natural thing and she hadn’t bathed since the previous morning. within 30 seconds i was ready to go. since then i do it whether i need to or not and it works even better to the point she commented “man that was fast”. just let you ‘love juices” build back up, maybe get a hobby, build a bird house or something. it is like withdrawal.
@John
I definitely agree that porn is the root of the problem. And I think for those guys out there that are having a hard time with the abstinence experiment that they consider simply quitting porn first yet still allowing themselves to masturbate whenever they feel the need. I’ve done this personally and recognized that without the external stimulus of pornography you will eventually decrease the frequency in which you feel the need to fap since your body is seeking to re-balance it’s hormone levels. Basically, like a drug addiction, porn is giving you an external stimulus when your body doesn’t need it.
I am in the process of rebooting myself. Some of the post’s are very interesting, this is obviously a very relevant and thought provoking topic. An earlier post mentioned having more attractive women in your sphere or proximatety when T levels are high. I can certainly relate to this although I also notise women dress better when you dress better. It is the same thing really. Kind of like when I am working out really hard and consistantly more and more fit woman come into my zone naturally. All probably can be attributed to higher T levels.
@ Matt Savage
Your article/post is fantastic. More than you can ever know.
Recently after coming across this page and reading all the comments, I motivated. Somehow I was easily able to overcome my porn and masturbation addiction that has spanned over 10 years (24 years old). Yes it was an addiction, i tried to quit before and FAILED multiple times. This time, it was like magic, i saw what countless people experienced, and that there was a reward at the end of the tunnel.
Right now i’m on my fourth day and there is no compulsion to masturbate whatsoever, i would have withheld my comments until the 7th day but i saw you post so i have to tell you this:
I was recently diagnosed with ADHD and i was given some medication to help me focus (dexerdine). The beauty of this is, after abstaining for 2-3 days, my mind was so clear, so focused, that it felt like i was on these medications when infact i didn’t take them in the past few days for the sake of the experiment. Lets say that abstaining is equivalent to about 60-75% of the dosage i’m on. If i start exercising, i bet that my ADHD symptoms would come close to vanishing completely. It is as if i was misdiagnosed, and my real problem was jacking off every day before bed. It is funny really, i even humorously thought about denying my partner sex because the affects I’ve experienced after abstaining for 3 days now, are amazing. That is just 3 days, wow can’t wait till 7.
I took my meds today, and i didn’t even notice much of a change at all. Brain was already primed and ready to kick ass and take names. very minor improvement from meds.
The meds i take help release dopamine in the brain which i believe is partly responsible in the motivation/focus factor. I guess i have been depleting it too fast by masturbating daily.
So Thanks Matt, for sharing this with us.
Cheers.
I am Day 3 and this forum is really helping out. I am not too worried about going to much over a month. When I hit the gym next week after a small break for recovery I will start notising the effects.
Yesterday day 2 failed… It’s not so much the porn but the live chat video porn type sites that messes me up.
Yeah, I must agree that the comments are cool, you see success stories, theories and unfortunately, falls – just as I failed yesterday (technically tonight), but I believe most of us keep trying, as this is a voluntary choice and we have seen the consequences.
Even though I busted a nut tonight, a chick was trying to pick me up today, I don’t know to what to attribute this, but I’d say myself, haha.
I think I can vouch for the general hypothesis that abstinence puts you in an attractive frame of mind. My experience is that every time I abstain from masturbation for more than a week I have had the opportunity for some actual action. Of course, reading this article was a bit of selective exposure, as I found it by looking to see if anyone had experienced the same thing; but reading the comments it seems there’s enough anecdotal evidence to conclude that something is going on here.
Now, this may not work for everyone, but I’ve developed a few guidelines to get the most out of the experience.
1 – Get off the computer. If you’re a regular porn user you’ll know that sitting at the computer, alone, for a long time can increase the likelihood of a quick fap. So limit your use or bring your computer some place less private.
2 – Find ways to use sexual energy. If you’re going to abstain for any length of time you will find a new source of energy borne of sexual frustration. Use it. Exercise is a great way of dealing with this, and is obviously beneficial in other areas.
3 – Go outside. Especially in the summer, when the girls are showing some skin. If you’ve been a few days without beating it you’ll notice a marked difference in your reaction to such sights. This is good. That’s the energy you’re after. (It’s also the energy they’re after)
4 – Meet people. Make a few first impressions in your new state of mind and see how things play out. I see a lot of previous comments that describe this experience. Trust me, it’s very rewarding.
If you find the difference in the way your brain functions to be off-putting, I implore you to continue anyway. You won’t turn into a slavering sex-fiend. You’ll just be more aware of the women (or men if you go for that) around you. And that is a very good thing, because believe it or not, they are aware of you, and many of them like what they see.
@sam Awesome post, your intentions are good and appreciated. that’s a nice list of helpful things probably holding back progress for alot of people attempting this. I deleted, no dragged all my porn links into a folder and his it away in archive. Hope that minimizes the temptations.
@detailer you know that weird experience you had the after a few days of abstinence? The shaking and release of some energy? I think I had that in my first few weeks of dorming at college. I had a roommate and was so busy with new college life that I think I didn’t fap for months. I thought honestly that I had reached enlightenment or something back then, but come to think of it maybe it was just a burst of T. I remember one night I felt my whole body get warm and I felt like I was floating on my bed with pure love and warmth. Those few months I was unusually social and had abundant energy. Faplessness probably was the cause. I really want to experience that warmth again so I will really focus on going 2 weeks.
@ed. Yes T creates some magic like that .
Most of the tests conducted on this have not been more than a week. They seem to conclude that t levels increase by a great deal after a week and subside. There was an experiement in China which seemed to conclude this. In my view that was very limited, I have found going more than a month means a series of peaks and troughs. Last time I did it I got very horny after a bit over a month. When I reboot, I have to get the urge to fap out of my system a few times, once I get a few days under my belt I start to feel good again.
I’ve also been experimenting with this “no fap” theory. On the fourth and fifth day I felt really good..really powerful and very confident.
Now I am on day 9 and it seems to have a reduced effect right now (for me). I no longer have the clear mindset I used to get..It must be because I’m really horny ..it’s hard to not think / look at women when you are walking in the city. I will not give up though..
Strange thing that happened on day 4..i got “blueballs” somewhere near the evening..I really don’t know why, I wasn’t in any state of arousal.
I’m gonna keep going
The key is to really stick with it, having this thread can be a great support system. By keeping really busy, and having faith you will get your needs seen to that’s the way I look at it.
Is it “normal” to sometimes release small quantities of sperm when you urinate ? It happens to me when I’m horny all day long ( ive been FAP free for 12 days now ) and I get a small pain in my balls but fades away quickly.
Zorro…
It’s normal in that case, but that doesn’t mean good… what I mean is if you get aroused just by thinking or looking or curiosity of sex or female bodies (assuming this from a straight male perspective) then there are movements inside the endocrine system and semen is produced and starts a process of “combustion” which is difficult to stop… the only way is to ignore the itch as soon as possible and not only not acting on it but also not thinking about it, which is a form of action. What happens is that you will produce the semen/testosterone and loose that fine energy. There is no need to transform sex, just ignore it, dont think about it, stop the addiction one day after the other. I guess
“best workout ever”
ok, i think i’m on the fifth day.. yesterday i almost lost the battle, but i didn’t let jizz pop. that porn is evil and still enticing me. but glad i won the battle last night cuz i got some progress reports from today.
i remember last time i made it to day 5 i had the pretend ballsac caressing action from car in front of me.
i think my progress today is even better.
usually when i went to venice beach, i usually wear my hoodie. somewhat out of shyness to show off my body and somewhat to prevent skin cancer. anyways, today i had this new type of thinking.. “if i show m0re, i will get more.” really odd bold thinking that just came up probably from the increasing T. so instead of the hoodie, i wore a beater and sometimes just shirt off totally. usually only walk the board walk 100% of the time to get my cardio in. but today i got this urge to start walk towards the shoreline instead of the boardwalk. something inside me wanted to see more skin. and sure enough all the hot babes were sitting lying out in the sand sunbathing. i just walked by nonchalantly thinking, why didn’t i just walk the shoreline all this time? from now on, i will probably walk the shoreline instead. no real interaction at all, but i was satisfied with the increased quality of scenery. the increased T is naturally getting me closer to hotter more closer to naked women, because i am seeking them out more aggressively.
ok, that’s sort of normal progress. not really earth shattering.. but at night i went to go work out at the gym…
i sorta had a hunch it would be a good work out session because when i was going to park my car there was a really hot asian girl walking by and another lady was eyeing me while i drived by. i believe in these preludes.. small positive signals come before positive events.
i walked into the gym as usual, trying to be as alpha as possible. and, i noticed a latina lady that i always notice. i really like her a lot but in the past i stared at her body too intensely and i know she doesn’t like me that much. i creeped her out in the past. but today… for some reason.. oh yea it started at target. i told myself… “don’t stare at their titties or ass, just look at their eyes and treat them like a person.” lately, i’d been getting a lot of negative IOI’s from staring too much at ladies titties and asses. i don’t know if it’s the increasing T or lack of masturbating, but something sensible just reminded me to just look at their eyes instead. maybe i was just getting tired of the negative IOIs.
anyways, i tried to just look at her eyes and look away. i really fought hard not to look at her titties or ass. i was doing the leg curls when i couldn’t take it anymore and told myself… “a little peak won’t hurt.” and just looked at her ass for about 3 seconds. i wasn’t sure but it seemed like i felt she tapped her ass a little with her hand. but she usually doesn’t do that for me, so i just ignored it.
then some other girls were starting to give me positive IOIs.. playing with hair, licking lips, displaying ass type of behavior. the usual stuff that i’m sort of used to.
but ok… changed to the calf press machine… one whole side next to me was just a group of women doing leg presses together, including the latina girl that i like. i started doing calf presses.. then i noticed the hot asian girl i saw when i was parking my car get onto the inner thigh aparatus in front of me. that fucking set up is really sexualized because the person doing calf pressed is forward motion of the crotch and the inner thigh is a spreading and closing of the legs. anyways, i was calf pressing and she was spreading her legs open and shut… the timing was almost like we were fucking. LOL i didn’t think much of this. and honestly in the past i would think to myself… “every time i get on the calf presses, all the girls just run away because it’s really awkward for them to be there. in front of a creep like me.” then all of a sudden a fucking line starts forming for the inner thigh machine.. all girls that i think are medium, decent hot are getting in line to use that machine and i’m like… “i’m in heaven” lol and i have no choice but to be staring at these girls asses in front of me lining up so i started getting a semi boner. then, one of the latin girls on the other machine blurts out, “i have to stick it out.” i look and she sticks her ass out in my direction like 1 feet away. then, she said it again and sticks her ass out again. my semi- is like pretty decent sized. then, the latina girl that i really like started to get closer to me. she’s like 1 feet away now too… and started to shake her ass and kinda jiggle it. honestly, she turned me on so much that my boner was full-on now. and all my attention was on her. then, i noticed one of the cute ones who’s ass i was watching initially get upset and just walk away. then the latina girl did this cheerleader type movement, like she was really happy and that she had won. i really think they were competing for my attention. then this really big girl with a big ass came up real close and just stood there for like 30 secs for no apparant reason with her ass in my direction. but really my attention was on the latina girl i liked so she gave up and walked away too. anyways i was thinking to myself, “this is the best work out ever.” the other day on day 2 the older lady had stuck her finger in her mouth and touched her right breast, but this action beat that by far because… this was a group of women competing for my attention to get me to get a hard-on. not only that the winner was the women i had liked but kept rejecting me in the past for my creepiness. also, i noticed an unusual amount of hot women like 8 and 9s in the gym while i was working out so maybe increased T does get one in synchronicity with a sexual vibration that gets you closer to hotter women. (not science, just a guess)
i don’t know, maybe this is a small win. but i’m really happy because the latina girl that runs away from me usually, today, actually got closer and shook her butt around 1 feet away from me and kept looking back towards me from time to time. maybe ignoring her body played a role. maybe she really likes being checked out and it was unusual for me to not stare at her so it forced her into trying to get my attention. or maybe the other girls giving me a semi and giving me IOIs created a competitive spirit in her. either way, i like the outcome and i was very satisfied with my work out session.
day 5.. maybe i am starting to become more aggressive towards wanting women. and my brain is giving me better hints as to what will attract and not scare women away. maybe the non-fapping is returning me to a more normal state where im not sex crazed and can think more clearly.
also something weird.. i went to the dentist today and i usually flirt around and are attracted to the dentist’s apprentices but i wasn’t attracted to them at all. i wonder what happened there. maybe my T increase is making me only attracted to hot women and not normal looking women anymore? but, although i wasn’t really attracted to them at all i noticed myself having longer conversations with them and they were actually opening the conversations on me.
another change i noticed is that i am listening to more upbeat rock music instead of my heavier gangster rap music. i dunno where that shift is coming from either. but it’s a distinct change.
i hope i can make it to a month. i can’t imagine how it might change my life when i can go a month without fapping.
Ps: sorry again for the TMI. also, right now my body feels as though i had ejaculated. maybe the lack of porn and fapping is being displaced into my social life encounters. the experience at the gym today was so intense that my body is kinda shaking just thinking about it. i think the shaking is coming from that latina girl’s overt behavior. i need to learn how not to get nervous around her and other hot women. hopefully, non-fapping with increase my T enough that i’m not scared of them anymore.
Doesn’t anyone think that these “signals” could just be coincidences? Maybe they’re not actually trying to give you signals at all.
I went 7 days and noticed no difference, except erections in the morning.
Yea it’s possible they could be coincidences.
i can’t believe it but i’m at day 6… this link that was posted above was really helpful.. it has inspired me to want to go 90 days.
http://www.reuniting.info/download/pdf/0.BENEFITS.pdf
i found these two as well that are very inspiring…
http://yourbrainonporn.com/90-days-straight-25-years
http://yourbrainonporn.com/rebooting-accounts
as for myself.. one big difference i’m seeing is that i’m getting better at eye contact with women. i am starting to see that a lot of people are actually much shyer than me. if good eye contact happens, a connection can be created and anything can happen from there.
also, i am a cashier and i usually don’t joke around, im sort of a analytical serious type. but i made 2 jokes on 2 different occasions and the women laughed. so maybe that’s progress too.
i’ll just keep the potentially coincidental flirtations to myself.
I am currently on my fourth day. I have attempted to start a 7 day cycle before, I lasted 6 days then went back to doing it nearly everyday. I have slowly been cutting down. Its funny that women actually seem drawn to you, I have noticed this the last couple of days. Random women getting close to me for no reason. They must be able to sense it. I am going to try and last 6 weeks now. I want to become a more masculine, assertive and productive guy, I think stopping masturbating will help me to do this.
Day 7 – last night i almost jiz popped again but i edged it instead. i notice i am less horny when jerkfesting to live porn chat bc i know at the end of it will be no jizz. it makes the whole experience less fun and enjoyable. but at least i didnt jizz. when cashiering, i noticed a few times that when i speak the girls would speak in a high pitched cute voice. i didn’t get that before. usually it felt like they were talking down to me with an aggressive pitch. maybe my voice is lowering and their natural inclination is that high pitched sound. almost feels like we are lovers already. one of the cashier girls who has a boyfriend did an intentional bend over to show her ass tat. that’s rare because her bf is my friend so i try my best not to flirt with her. other than that, i take this stuttering guy home every so often i prolly took that guy home like 30 times already. i have a set route i always take back home. but for some reason, tonight my brain had the ability to think a few images deeper forward to create a route home that was quicker. it has to be the non-fapping. the natural T stored from non-fapping is probably enhancing my thinking skills. but, one negative side effect… my horniness is much lower than before. i think i wanted women a lot more when i was fapping to porn. it’s making me into a gentleman instead of a sex crazed maniac. i don’t know which is worse. but overall.. i think what i lack most is a nice deep lower voice, happiness and stable emotions. if the excess T from non-fapping will bring me those traits to me. it will end up a net positive, worthy of an exchange for that horniness feeling.
so from what i can tell.. i should transform from a…
horny, sex crazed maniac, who attract women easily, but cannot connect or close the deal because of lack of deep voice, sustainable energy, emotional stability, common sense and lack of happiness feelings.
to
mildly horny gentleman with deep voice and better thinking skills, sustainable, happier energy, with emotional stability who connects better with women.
ideally, it should go this way.
I started wanking at the ripe age of 7 or 8. I didn’t always wank, but from 8-9 year ago, it’s been almost a daily thing. Never multiple times though, twice at most. I’ve had two relatively long relationships during this time, and the first one, I lost because of excessive masturbation. I would masturbate to this hot ass girl on a magazine every single day to the same chick, and when I was with the GF at night, I didn’t feel like fucking her. Time went by, and the relationship went sour, and we broke up. My second relationship was much better, we had sex on a regular basis, but she always wanted more, and sometime I couldn’t do it cuz I wasn’t horny and I couldn’t get it up! Anyway, I knew that I masturbated too much to be health, but I just kept going, until I made a resolve to slow down, and luckily I found this blog which I read everyday to keep me going. I tell you, I’m on day 12, and my life has changed. Up until the 6th or 7th day, I was on fire, so MUCH energy! I could think straight; I had visual difficulty with my left eye, now it’s gone!
I’m much more social with people I meet, I don’t go the other way if I see someone I don’t wanna have a conversation with, now I go for it. Although I must say, my heightened sexual desire has plateaued a bit, I enjoy this feeling of clarity.
I definitely see a difference with the girls. At work, the chicks I work with are trying to look better, one even ditched the glasses! the other one is now wearing lipstick. DAmn!
I’m going out this weekend looking to ravage someone, and I do have a few prospects. I’ll release on Sunday though, and go through the cycle again! I will update you guys on what takes place.
Let’s keep writing about our experiences and learn from each other.
Day 8 irritable or honest? when driving. usually i don’t really get mad at other drivers, but today i saw my myself honestly criticizing action of other bad drivers aloud. really unusual bc i’ve been raised to be congenial and polite. maybe this is the type of aggressiveness needed to do well in life and with women. i can see how this energy can be used to defend myself when being attacked by others. i usually go the ghandi route and stay pacifist in all situations. hopefully this energy doesn’t get out of hand and i can control it’s use when necessary.
Daniel, you must be contributing the most to this section
About your agressiveness, I believe it comes together with abstaining, more energy/T and you’re becoming more “alpha”, and in a way you are correct. Just think back, alphas had to defend their territory and intimidate the rest, and it was plain simple how to do it = bruteness.
I have noticed something like this also, however it’s not really helpful for me, as I get really pissed (my chess matches for e.g.).
Day 9 morning… upon waking… out of the ordinary.. started doing stretches where i felt my body was feeling unlively. spontaneous thought pops up.. “where is the true man within me?” i think a lot of my manliness is mimicry of other men, not an authentic manliness that comes from within me. unoriginal copy of other alphas. sperm is what allows us to procreate. it is the center of our creative energies. so… it makes sense that storing that energy will enhance our creative energies. with this increase of creative powers and T, my mind is not satisfied with being a copy of other alphas. it is longing to create something on it’s own. it wants to become an original alpha. the real deal.
also, i never do this, while i was stretching… i started to shadow box on the images of current and historical friends. usually i am a forgive and forget kind of person. but, i decided to shadow box on their images to relieve whatever spite i had against them. it was very relieving, i just hope this doesn’t happen in the physical world. i don’t need jail time. it won’t happen.
also i had a dream, one of my old best friends who has an IQ of 148.. he kept saying to me..”you done fucked up” over and over. bc of his intelligence he has always been above me. in the dream, i just head butted his face and he finally shut up. lol when i woke up i had to check my head to see if it was bleeding cuz that headbutt felt genuine. lol
@cool.. yes, it’s a bruteness… i actually am able to summon that bruteness through affirmations, but it’s not a natural thing that just flows from my self. i really have to muster it up to happen. i think i have mastered a lot of alpha skills through practice, affirmations, but i think this version of alpha is more authentic bc it is being created by your own T.
First, I want to thank the author for this article.
Started the abstinence program a first time and lasted 4 days. A few observations:
-Stable, rock hard feeling in my gut (felt unshakeable and fearless)
-Regular women excite me (don’t need the crazy dolled up hollywood type)
-Stronger, fuller, more sensitive erections
-Men exhibiting beta traits around me
-Women seem to be in a trance when speaking to me; while also looking to fill awkward gaps in conversation
I want to clarify that I experienced all of this without hitting the gym. I barely left my home for those 4 days (only to eat, I also work from home). I also eat like shit (a lot of fast food). I am really interested to see how things will pan out once I start eating raw/high protein foods and begin hitting the gym.
On the night of day 4 I visited a non-hardcore amateur website. Without wanting to blew the biggest load I had ever seen/felt (was trying to masturbate without ejaculating; a lot harder than you think). Prior to starting the program, I was masturbating at least once a day. I am 25 and have been masturbating since the age of 13 and while I have been with a good number of women over the course of my life, I have never had sex with a woman feeling like I did on day 4. I will update once I hit my goal of 2 weeks.
hey guys i’m on day 4 and i’ve read this entire blog post and all of its comments. everything is very interesting and i’m definitely seeing some extra motivation to do things that I know I should do but normally don’t. a little background I’m 25 years old and have been masturbating since 12 almost daily. prior to stumbling upon this page the week before i began i’ve been doing it twice daily and i knew it was such a waste of time so i decided to look into it.
ever since stopping, my work outs are getting more intense. i’ve been staying home lately but will go out tonight to see if there is a difference in interaction with women. i have noticed since adopting a healthier life style (raw foods, juicing) the attention I get from women has increased. i plan on trying the 7 day abstinence and then pay closer attention to days 7-10 to see if there is a drop for me.
i did find something very interesting i thought i’d like to share. i stumbled upon a TED talk about “10 things you didn’t know about orgasm” and the speaker Mary Roach states:
“…Another way that orgasm might boost fertility … Sperm that sits around in the body for a week or more start to develop abnormalities that make them less effective at head banging their way into the egg.”
British Sexologist Roy Levin (sp?) has speculated that “This is perhaps why men have evolved to become such enthusiastic and frequent masturbators. If I keep tossing my self off I keep fresh sperm being made.”
Theory: Is this related to the peak of T-levels of abstaining in the 7th day and then such a sudden drop off? It could be due to the abnormalities being developed in the sperm and that’s why there is a drop off. Very interesting.
Here’s a link to the video.
http://www.ted.com/talks/mary_roach_10_things_you_didn_t_know_about_orgasm.html
9:55 mark
i think 7 days is enough. excessive masturbation on a daily basis might mess with T, but if you go too long without release, yea, no fresh sperm. plus, you start to feel like a monk. your sexual vibe drops a little. jizz popped on 9th day with 2 minutes of porn. that’s pretty bad because before it took me 30mins to 1 hour to jizz. the load was medium, but for some reason it flew really far. my keyboard is crying to be cleaned.
Coming up for week two tommorrow. That is when I start to get a good feeling. One could argue that doing this is similar to taking t shot or supplements.
I stopped jacking 10 years ago. I was severely addicted to it. So,when I hear guys say that they can barely get through 3 days, in a way it seems outlandish now, but I can understand it. I was there. Masturbation replaces real sex. It gets you in the habit of continually short circuiting your sex drive for something cheap. So masturbation is not pro-sex. It’s anti-sex. I love sex. I’m different with a woman now that I don’t masturbate. For me there was the deep underlying feeling of something that I wasn’t proud of. Masturbation conditions you to be stimulated by mechanical means rather than stimulated by your thoughts and feelings. When you are with a woman you will feel a lot better and she will too, when being close to her does more for your erection than how much up and down motion you are getting . Without masturbation you are worth 10 times more to a woman sexually. It’s an addiction like nicotine or opiates. When the cycle is broken it is very easy to abstain. The easiest way to do it is with the support of a real woman that loves sex and doesn’t masturbate herself. Quitting was the best thing I ever did, not to decrease my pleasure, but to increase it many times over. Very few men understand this.
damn mike, that testimony makes me want to try abstaining again… i’ve been satisfied lately from dropping from daily to 3-4 times a week. although it’s not perfect, it’s progress. i think in my case, i use supplements, so it seems like i get similar benefits from them. but…. i think the natural route of non-fap has a pronounced effect on women.
http://www.hipforums.com/newforums/showthread.php?s=c659c997d38a8be80ed86356bed2487b&t=405185&page=2
This is a little about edging. Agree Teterone has a profound effect on women.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4GN2cE4d1mA&feature=plcp
“Another practice common to porn users is edging while viewing porn. This is masturbating up to the edge of orgasm, then stopping to cool things down, then revving up again. This is probably worse than simply having an orgasm and getting it over with. Edging keeps the dopamine levels near their peak, while at the same time reinforcing the addiction pathways associated with porn. Edging without porn, or an orgasm, is not a solution, because it keeps dopamine (and thus cravings for more) very high. Edging without orgasm leads to feelings of dissatisfaction, strong urges, and usually ends in a porn binge.”
http://yourbrainonporn.com/what-if-i-use-porn-without-orgasm
Edging is probably not cheating, if you are going to lapse it is a better option.
This dude stopped masturbating/porn,and his testosterone went up.He got proof pics:
http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=144025971
I pretty much believe it, I know there are a lot of sceptics.
oh my.
It’s been 5 days and I feel like a new man.
It’s funny, I blamed all my emotional problems on marijuana/coffee/sleep-deprivation without giving masturbation much thought. what a mistake that was…
As it turns out, not wanking it makes all the difference. I’m almost the opposite as I was before:
-severe social anxiety has been replaced with natural swagger and borderline cockiness (no pun intended)
-weak libido has transformed into raging libido
-I swear I even look better in the mirror. I look myself in the eye and think “damn, I wanna do you.” just kidding. but seriously.
-and women respond to me in a whole new way. I swear, every single girl I walk by flicks her hair or licks her lips. Just now I was in the cafeteria, and there are all these mom’s and their kids taking tours of my college, and two milfs straight-up approached me and seemed eager for a good spanking. It’s like I’m giving off some invisible energy force that attracts females. But when I spank it all the time, I think my energy force repels them.
This transformation of spirit has even translated to academics. For the first time in two months, I have the motivation to start writing this brutal 20 page paper.
I feel busting with confidence overall, almost fearless.
I feel like a man. Finally.
honestly, this might just be the best thing I’ve ever done for myself.
hello crew,
i have been following this post for over a year now… as many of you, i’ve had ups and downs, been on and off. so what i’ve noticed/experienced is:
it is directly related how hard it is gonna be to abstain, and the frequency of “self-amusement” before that; trouble getting asleep; really HARD times in the mornings (in both meanings =]); increased aggressivenes and not-give-a-shitness; feeling more energetic and less apathic/tranquil.
now about that “women-sensing-IT thing”…. i don’t know how you guys look, but i don’t find myself too ugly nor too handsome… but i NEVER see anything like you are describing here… i’m not an idiot and i know how they are supposed to show/express those hints/signals, but i’m telling you- I NEVER GET ANYTHING like that… it is actually hard to believe many of your reports of women behaviour while “on the program”.
and last thing- since i’m not an athlete nor a student, there is no need for me for that extra aggressiveness in work-sleep-work life. that extra T or dopamine, or reduced prolactin, or whatever only causes unnecessary frustration ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexual_frustration ). so to me personally it is only a choice between this or depression and apathy if i return to “the habit”.
definitely still a subscriber here,
cheers!
wow iv been reading this post and I’m really motivated to see how nt wanking helps in catching girls, I have a gf of 9 months and we have agreed to not have sex for a while so iv been trying to see if I can’t replace normal intercourse with masterbation so I went and researched it and all I get is wanking is good for you and how you shud do it regularly, that’s bullshit as the earlier poster Kambe said it doesn’t help much. I remeber this 1 period in my life I’d do it every time I was left alone In the house and even waiting till every1 went to bed. The feeling of tiredness really annoyed me. I stopped for a while but ddnt see any effect except wanting to do it again and again. It seems like stopping for a long while helps in getting girls but I’m not intrested in that. Anyway I’m also going to start this and see where it lands me coz I was really thinking of wanking instead of having full sex with my girlfriend.
Oh ja, I remember recently iv just been a hit with girls- last time I pulled the string was on friday and on sunday I met these other girls at a mall and hell they were all over me and my usual awkwardness was gone. I think I shud go strong and see how far I can go…
i wanna thank all of you for sharing your stories!
i was in great shame and felt like a sack of shit untill i found this epic thread!
i am 25 year old man from Europe, i’ve been jerking the gurking since i was 7 years old, 3-4-5 times a day! and y’all can trust me when i tell you how much i liked it! until…..
until i found out that i had jerked myself into a very sexual depression. i searched the web hoping to find some answers and get some clearance, but all i could seem to find was the IT’S ALL GOOD SON, PULL YOUR SNAPPER!!! sign.. it was all over the web, but luckily i found this thread and got into it right away!
in my first attempt i went for 14 days without yanking it…
the first couple of days i felt frustrated, i was full of anger and fear..
after 4-5 days i started to feel DAMN good about myself, and this feel just escalated trough the rest of my attempt.
then.. i woke up on frieday the 13th, i had a raging boner and i could not controll myself, so i grabbed it han beat it as hard as i could and then it happend… MY FUCKING EYES ROLLED BACKIN INTO THE BACK OF MY SKULL AND I MOANED LIKE A FUCKING APE!!! after that i felt REAL REAL good for about a minute!
then my whoe life started to suck ass again and i became so sad about it..
well!! this is now my second attempt – day 4! i am starting to feel those good vibrations again, and next time i feel like i can’t control myself, i will just hurry to get my ass out of be and get my mind straight!!
again… i thank all of you for your stories.. you are all LIFE SAVERS!!!!
cheers! >)
@tim awesome post good stuff!!
@mrcrash nice dude!!!
for myself.. day 10.. sick so stuck near 80% but can tell there is something to this non-fapping… i will continue this for a while.
Day 1, no change at all, altho I’m a bit less sleepy but was tired the whole day. This is like a mega awesome page and sucks to all parents and teachers telling you that its good for you…
day 2 coming off day10… i felt an enormous sense of well being at one point during the night. i haven’t felt like that in a 2 decades. also, i caught myself laughing at things, which was kinda weird laughing by myself, but i felt a happiness there. i believe non-fapping gets you in touch with your emotions and allows clearer thinking. the other week i realized that i should not stare at women for too long. so lately, i’ve been using the affirmation, “never stare” it was really really hard in the beginning but i got so good at it that now it’s no longer a problem. but a cool unexpected side effect from this “never stare” is that i now have total control over my mind. i can calm my mind in an instant now. the logic is this… if i can control myself not to stare at big titties, nice asses, and hot women…. not staring at depressing or anxious thoughts is so easy. it’s the exact same mechanism… instead of not starting at big titties, i can now just not stare at depressive or anxious thoughts. i think non-fapping is resetting my self control, my mind and my emotions. i think the extra T is allowing me to use all my functions fully. it is awesome. the T is naturally guiding myself into a healthful condition.
just one T brag.. i was walking on the shoreline and this lady started to adjust her bikini top and when i was right about next to her she let out her whole right boob, nipple and all. that was kinda awesome.
I am on my third week and aside from edging a little from time to time have not lapsed. From time to time I get incredibly horny, I am trying to resist as I think you experience a real sensce of wellbeing after a month. I am working out five times a week and surfing regularly, I do feel I am getting more attention that is for sure, the sense of improved well being is undeniable that is for sure.
I genuinely believe that if you make it a priority to cut fap out, you will be rewarded in the long term with the kind of partner you desire, sometimes that is difficult to grasp as I don’t go out gaming a great deal, but it is just a hunch that if I stick with it I will be rewarded.
Today marks my 28th day of abstinence. It’s been with ups and downs, but I made it. And I can still continue. I’m pretty much indifferent of women right now..i can ignore them on the street and don’t bother getting their attention. And I feel indifferent of porn as well..i like watching pictures of nude / sexy women now..I don’t know why
My only problem right now is getting the right mental attitude..the famed focused mindset that you guys have been talking about. I’ve always had a problem with motivation anyways..like a brain fog that keeps me from achieving things. I know it’s mostly in my mind, but damn it’s hard to get motivated
Day 10 then 2 then 2… Wow that second fap really screwed me up… Now I know what days the Girls start running from me. It’s consecutive days of fapping that causes it. When things are good I attract Girls from 1 mile away.. After 2 faps its the polar opposite they are literally running! Lol I think women can smell or sense a creepy energy or alpha energy from a mile away. Wow when it’s good it’s really good but when it’s bad it’s really bad. I should stop fapping once and fOr all… Women running is not good for my self esteem lol!!!
Day 4. Well its da morning so I’ll see as the day progreses, last night was the worst and the afternoon also, I nearly broke down and finally fap bt chose to be strong, never thot I could resist such a temptation. Day 3 wasn’t that bad, surges of irritation swept through me but other than that nothing. But I can’t seem to be attracting them ladies!! Ok I knw I’m a taken guy but still… ah well still have to go through day 4.
Lasted 25 days got a very hot Chinese girl to give me a happy ending. I have pretty much quit fapping, just needed that bit of relief. Funny thing was a few minutes afterwards a car load of girls started giggling at me. Almost like they could sense it.
Hello,
I been abstaining from masturbation for past 8 day. And trying for 7 days cycle. But my concerns here are, since i been masturbating for quite a long time now if i suddenly stop doing it will it have any impact on my penis for example: will my penis will take a curve or any other penis related problem.
Hey guys, thought you might be interested in this great recent Ted Talk from Gary Wilson who runs Your Brain on Porn blog. It basically breaks down the effects of porn usage on men and takes a look at guys like us who are actively trying quit.
Things iv noticed since stopping improved skin less facial redness less acne, hair grows faster thicker, body is feeling toned and firmir, resistance to cold weather, more confidince less anxiety, better eye contact, noticing the little things in life and girls seem to be more attractivd to me this whole abstaining thing works guys iv been at it for a while on and off, you will notice improvment after 2 straight werks of no sexual thoughts or edging stay strong trust me
2 weeks no sexual thoughts ? Pretty much impossible
The following is for acne sufferers :
It’s been a month for me..a full month ! To be honest the only reason i agreed to this “no fap” experiment is that I still have some acne / easy irritable skin. And i’ll be frank.. my condition has improved. Perhaps my crappy genetics will prevent me from having a really nice skin like most people..but it’s ok as it is right now.
So for people that are wondering about no masturbation effects on acne..it’s safe to say that things will improve..and for some even 99% gone!
Main reason I think is Zinc. Zinc is an important mineral found in our body that helps with skin healing(scars/infections etc), regulates testosterone production, helps the prostate function properly, improves immune system,healthy muscle tissues and so on.
When you ejaculate you actually lose zinc(and other nutrients) because zinc keeps your little guys healthy and running towards their goal
Don’t expect miracles right away..but if you are doing this for the same reasons as I am..take a Zinc supplement each day for a while.
Like 30Mg divided into 2 pills of 15Mg each. In the morning and afternoon. Just make sure you eat something and then take it otherwise it might upset your stomach. You should also consider taking a multivitamin that contains Copper, Iron, Selenium and Magnesium (but no more that 100% max allowed daily intake dose). Since we are taking 200% zinc it might interfere with the absorption of other minerals
Good luck !
I am still gonna continue this “experiment” although I miss the deep sexy voice I had in the first week..seems to be gone for a while
^ionic zinc is what you need its balanced with copper and other stuff and absorbs easily and i didnt mean no sexual thoughts at all i still have them just try to block them when they come up so you dont get the urge to spank it and to the acne thing i dont have acne i have facial redness and dry skin and it has really improved so i take not spaking having good skin getting girls over spaking bad skin no girls anytime
Hello,
I’ve been abstaining for 9 days now. The first week was very tough. I had a erection all the time. But on the 7 day and on it stopped. I can still get an erection but i have to think about it for a while to get it going. I have a bet more energy.
I use to go to bed around midnight after wanking it and would wake up around 11 or noon. No i go to bed around midnight but wake up at 8 naturally, so now I’m not wasting my day.
The reason I wanted to start this was because I’ve read a lot about the benefits on not doing it and I wanted to see if it works and I was tired of feeling depressed and tired every time after masturbating.
I’m 21 right now and want to get full control over this problem. I planned on abstaining for 2 weeks, but i feel pretty good so I think I’ll just stick with it. I feel no need to masturbate anymore.
I really look forward to what I’ll feel like when I hit 3 weeks of not doing it. I want my voice to get a little deeper too.
It will get deeper without you even noticing
@Alpha>beta
perfect
Just stay focused on life it self and things will come to you consider your self a magnet
damn!! so i went for 9 days this time and then i failed misserable, spending 2 days jerking off! not to porn tho..
tomorrow is gunna be a whole new start for me, come to think of it, i wish that i could lay of the masturbation for good!
it seems like masturbation is the main key dragging me down, i hope to succeed this time and make the masturbation be gone for good!
this is my third attempt so wish me good luck!
Today marks my 9th day . I nearly gave up until I came back here and watched that video from Tedx. That made my resolcve stronger, my motivational levels have increased but so has my horniness levels. Feel like going to any girl and asking them to come to my place but sadly I can’t. Will keep on going for as long as I can manage…
I’m on day 2 again, but I’ve made it to day seven before and it was a great feeling. Some steps I use to stop masterbation is only go on the computer when you have to, Get out of your house , And if you really are about to explode hop right in a shower with the the water a little below warm not to cold tho.. or just always stay out and about…
My only problem with this article is that when I go 7 days abstaining and I actually get lucky, if I’m not wasted I’ll last 45 seconds if I’m lucky.
day 10. feeling ok. woke up energetic and full of strength .did my daily excersises and i didnt struggle like how i would usually do. i even made some notable progress in my breakdancing as i am still a beginner and upper body strength is verry crucial. Noticed that i look at women with more lustful eyes than ever. TS levels must be peaking very high… will continue being strong…
Relapsed today. It would have been 13 days. I’m already tired. I used my fleshlight, and then I decided to throw it away. It’s already in the trash bag outside. I used the FL a lot to masturbate, hope throwing it away will help.
I think fappin sucks the life out of men, if it is done too often. The porn industry is exploiting men by getting them addicted and high speed internet is only accelerating it. At the moment it is an issue which is not really spoken about, given time when they start to finally address men’s issues, will there be any awareness of this subject.
Hey, I’ve Spent 2 hours reading your guy’s post. I have been insecure, lazy, and unmotivated for long time, Mainly it was because I am Black and felt different from everyone. Recently, I’ve been researching spiritual stuff and I came across this some how. I an on day 2 and a half and I have noticed an increase in my vibratory and testosterone levels. I have also been experimenting with Cold showers, Kegel Exercises, Headstands to keep to my Testerone Level. You guys have really motivated me!! I Intend to use my sexual energy to increase my IQ (early 100′s) and to use my newly found positive energy to manifest something through Law of Attraction. I’m 16 and I have recently quit a year of non-stop wacker tacking.
My observations so far is an increase in confidence, Sorry no epic stories about attracting women yet, besides it’s only been 2 and a half days. I’m Also Planning to Flirt with the girl I like This Friday (when I’m close to peaking). Then releasing on Saturday and if not next week. I have also started a pullup regime. And i have improved concentration.
If you guys can’t Fight the urge Just look to future and Happy experiences you will get from doing NOTHING
Keep your hands dry and I intend to post this Saturday. Stay with me Guys.
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/cupids-poisoned-arrow/201001/was-the-cowardly-lion-just-masturbating-too-much?page=2
I have done no masturbation and no porn for about two months now, I have been failing a couple of times, but I’m getting better at it. It is pretty amazing what this has done to me. Best thing is that I feel fucking great, like walking in the crowd and knowing I am the man. More confidence and energy. Wow, sometimes I have so much energy I wanna freaking run across my town.. Freaking great feeling!!! I feel like wanna go out and do new stuff. Get motivation to reach my goals, and it feels s easy! I get alot of other benefits: Girls get more attracted to me. My muscles is more visible. My skin is clearer. So many.. I get freaking horny 4-5 times a day, if I see a hot ass..:p ANd wake up with a boner every morning, but that’s actually freaking great. It feel great to be horny! You just have to master not to masturbate. I still gonna do this for a long time.. I don’t say that I am never gonna masturbate again, but I will never watch porn again. That messes up with your brain..
Love what you wrote man! Keep it going. Pease
@David Are You Attracting Girls Yet? And Not Even Trying?
are there any guys here who felt/feel unattractive most of their lives, but after trying this thing for any amount of time, noticed attention from women? ‘cuz i know i don’t and that was kind of main point of this, right…? i mean- why would i need that extra energy just to fuel my frustration and other negative emotions…
Are you in style do you have a nice haircut maintained nose hairs eye brows clean clothes and especially clean shoes girls look at all that stuff
@Another Follower
How long have you been abstaining? Try Taking Cold showers I also found that to boast your testosterone and whatever you do don’t go back to binge jerking .
@Alpha>Beta
I’m Black so 80% of The Girls In This Country Will Definitely Reject Me. And How Long Have You Been Abstaining Has It Worked For you? Are You A Hive Attracting Bees?
Hey Guys, I’m also wondering if i can use the masculine and positive energy gained from abstinence for Law of Attraction and manifestation.
@Black abstainer
just what alpha>beta said, just abstaining doesn’t do the cut, you have to look the part, act the part and in a way, just be. Abstaining is more like a bonus/benefit, than a key factor.
And in what kind of country are you in that 80% of females will reject you due to your skin color? Sounds exaggerated, though I can’t be sure.
i am again at day 9!
everything feels fucking great and just keeps getting better, last night i had one of those wet dreams! i dreamt that i was sucking on the teet of a beautiful woman and i fucked her real good and came in the dream and here come the funny side of the story! the woman i fucked in my dream became pregnant and left me hahaha… @ me, ALLWAYS WEAR A RUBBER!!!
even tho i totally busted my nuts in my dreams there was no signs of fluid or anything.
this is my third attempt, in the first attempt i went for about 15 days, i started to feel real damn good about my self on day 12-15.. after this i slipped up and woke up one morning with my cock in my hand and i could not fight the urge, so i just blew my load and made myself misserable again hehe..!
on my second attempt i went for nine days and i started to feel good as hell, then i woke up a morning feeling so horny and i could not control it… that day i spanked the monkey way too many times! again i felt back into the dark pits…!
now i am here on my third attempt and it is the 9th day… i have not set a goal or nothing! i just wants to keep it up as long as i can control myself.
i’ve noticed, the women are giving me much more attention than they used to.. this is great and during the day i get random erections just thinking about a womans ass! hehe.. can you all imagine what would happen when i would be exposed to a real womans hot naked body?
shiiiit! i bet my cock would turn to steel and then the girl would be like WOOOW! THAT IS ONE HARD COCK!!!
well… this abstinence shit have changed my life in so many ways, i used to be insecure and not very outgoing, then i tried this abstinence shit and i have never felt as good about myself as i do now…
I AM SORRY FOR MY BAD ENGLISH AND GRAMMAR..!!
>D >D >D
@Cool
AMERICA!!! No girls like black guys were the most worst looking ever next to the aborigine’s of Australia. I’m completely different from most of the people in this country. your hair is straight and mine is curly. your nose is thin and mine is jew-like. your forehead is big and mine is small. I just don’t think I’ll ever attract any girls being a black guy. I got rejected by a Guatemalan girl for being black (she even said it).
Do I look that Bad? : http://s1093.photobucket.com/albums/i422/Jamil_Tucker/
@ Mr.Crash
Awesome!!! Are you Attracting women without approaching them?
I’m on 4 and half days btw
I have been going for a while now at this, the only relief I get is from a female, last night I felt really horny and it took a great deal of self control so I harnessed that energy and had a really great workout, I am using this to increase some of my lifts in the gym. What kind of distracts me is seeing a women in black tights, stockings, I really have to grab that energy. I find approaching a bit easier, it a real test of willpower, there is no doubt about that.
@ Black abstainer. You look fine, man. Like a regular guy. Don’t sweat it. From what I can glean from your posts you’re also intelligent. Just stay cool and be yourself. Don’t copy the hip hop gangsta types though, they have a bad rep. Question: Do you mainly hit on black chicks?
To all: There are other sites that suggests a reboot over a month or more. No porn, no masturbation, no orgasm. I’m not sure which method to choose – this cyclical one or the extreme rebooting variation. Some who have rebooted tells about total loss of libido for periods, and severe withdrawal symptoms. Others say the effects have been sunshine and harmony and increased sexdrive. I need both a more lively libido and erections I can rely on.
@Black Abstainer
You look like a normal person, stay positive all the time, if you even start contemplating things as you’ve written it’ll only get worse Be optimistic and happy.
As for all, I must say this isn’t just about dropping the “chicken choking” act, but in fact a change in a lifestyle. One must be committed. After my last failure I decided to quit it once and for all, started balancing my diet, intensifying my workouts. I became more ambitious, as it is not only just wanking, but a complete life changing set.
But now, the thing I discovered yesterday, what matters the most is the emotional state you are in. You are happy, you might even forget about porn or busting a nut, even if you’re working in front of your pc whole day, whereas where you are sad/disturbed/stressed even uncertain about something in the future, it influences your ability to abstain (in a bad way), and thought of just peeking at porn comes to your mind. And then you do, and then you bust a nut, feel better for the moment, yet worse overall. It’s like a vicious cycle, and I am sure some person has said these exact words before in the above comments, but it might not be from the emotional perspective.
It might be one thing to read about different experiences, ideas, etc. but your own experience is always different and stays with you, just as a saying goes, you can try to learn from others’ mistakes, but you’ll never learn from theirs as you’ll learn from yours. Yesterday I was about to do something silly, but this thing dawned on me, and I am a happy person now once again
[we discover something new every day]
@Black Abstainer I don’t know where YOU’RE from, but from my high school in Arkansas chicks go out of their way to date a black dude.
@ Mattias Well thanks, I’m not really into hip hop or that gangster stuff like my dad and brother, I like to listen to lyricless beats though. Personally, I Like Old fashion things like training my willpower, reading books on thinking, Increasing Intelligence and I guess my goal is to be ” The Most Interesting Man in The World”. Cool Huh?
Answer: No, And I don’t find myself attracted to white women either for some reason. The girls that turn me on the most are Latinas, Mediterraneans , Asians. I don’t hate black women I just don’t find them attractive.
@Cool Are you attracting girls in the gym? And when girls show you more that means your supposed to show them more, That’s right workout with just pants on!!
@Jake I’m in California, But I’ve never had a girlfriend. I’m a bit of a contradiction, I’m Nerdish but at the same time I’m not anyone’s bitch, I live in a fantasy world for imagery but I always try to make my dreams come true in this world. I can be cowardly, But i become brave when someone attacks me. Maybe once i get my original Testosterone levels back I might get my confidence, and with that a motivation to be productive society and not someone like my father who waste his life away by getting women pregnant and saying he cares for his children.
So im on day 8 of no fap and here is what I think. Its clear to me now that masturbating and looking at porn are two completely different problems. After not masturbating for a week I see more energy, a clearer mindset, quicker recovery in the gym, a deeper voice, more social, less anxious, less sleep but overall a big and positive change. Now, while I havent masturbated all week I still looked at porn at random points during the week, just too get hard and then I would stop, I guess it was just an urge to see if I could still get hard. But after going to the mall yesterday something hit me. Although there were a lot of fine looking girls my natural instinct of trying to make a connection with them was not really there. I was getting a decent amount of looks due to my lower voice and better posture which made it clear that im attractive to them but not so much vice-versa. At first I thought that my testosterone was low do to being tired from working out but now that I think about it……its the porn. I realize now that porn takes away my desire and the lust from meeting girls….i mean why would my brain want to be stimulated by clothed girls in real life when its seeing naked hotties online. By getting its dose of sexual dopamine with porn there is no need to get it in real life. Now with just one day of not looking at any porn I can feel the sexual tension in me rise, I can already feel the testosterone fueling the lust. This has made it obvious that although a big problem as a whole, masturbating and porn are two completely different problems. Im going to continue not masturbating and will stop looking at any and all types of pornographic stimulation. Hopefully this makes sense to anyone reading this, and i will continue to post my discoveries. Nofap, Noporn
this is my 13th day, last night i was soooo horny!
i decided to play for myself and promised myself whatever happend i would not let myself cum, i lubed up the sucker and yanked and played with it for about one hour then after that hour i was on the verge of exploding my ball juice all over the place, but!! i could now feel that i should not go any further and so i put the dick down and took me one of those cold coooold showers… overall i felt pretty fucking happy about the whole situation! i mean here i was playing with myself wih no porn without having an orgasm !?
i went to bed and slept real good and had alot of dreams, then early in the morning i had a wet dream about me fucking the shit out of some pretty ass girl i met at the supermarket lol..
so in the dream i really gave it to her and then finaly it happend.. I WAS ABOUT TO BURST, AND AS I CAME IN THE DREAM I WOKE UP FROM MY DEEP SLEEP AND CAME A WHOLE SHITLOAD OF CUM IN MY BOXERS!!!
at first i was thinking nooo nooo what the hell did i do!?!? after this i realized that even tho i had ejaculated from a dream my pulse or heart rate did not really go up during the happening itself, so i wonderd to myself, would i feel all bad and shit afterwards ?!
i went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror… i looked for that very special glance in my eyes that i’ve gained during abstinence and guess what you sorry mother fuckers… IT WAS STILL THERE!!!
i still can’t belive it.. i fucking jizzed in my sleep and i don’t have no sense of shame or bad feeling about it at all!!
this is truly a new discovery…
whadda you think guys? i have not relapsed have i ?
i mean, since i have not jerked and ejaculated myself… this case is more like something that happend while i was fucking uncontious in my sleep.. isn’t this NATURES way of getting rid of that seemen overload ?
cheers.. day 13th still going strong!
Mr. Crash, you have, what do you think, this edging means nothing? Just stop tricking/lying to yourself, you’re the one that wants this change, nobody else.
@ cool.
but i did no ejaculate while edging… hell, i don’t agree with you on this one mate! i can not be held responsible for ejaculating trough wet dreams.
even tho i have edged to get a little hapiness back into my life… that does not mean that i jerked of and ejaculated, leaving myself in a depressed mode as usual…
alot of guys on here mentioned they become a little off after some weeks and so i read a post with one guy mentioning edging. this guy was right about it, it actually works if you don’t bust your damn nuts. i don’t think i have relapsed, which means > going back into the sad old bad habbit pleasing myself just to feel misserable.
This is what I meant when I said “lying to yourself”. This is not my business at all, if you want to look for loopholes/shortcuts etc. it is your choice, but the fact remains,. Let me explain:
you edge yourself, therefore any simple sexual encounter in “dream world” is enough [to bust], however, most likely it would not have such significant effect if there was no edging.
THERE IS NO RULE “BUST YOUR NUT OR NOT”, the only thing there is: are you ready or not (to let go of it, and start a new episode of your life). In your case, it seems that you are just not ready yet. I’ve been in your place before, but now that I think of it, it sounds like a joke (edging part), I am happy that I realised it, I hope you will realise it also.
@ cool
one will allways try to find he’s way trough the maze, short or not >P…
i gotta give it to you, you really breaks down what this edging makes one in a dream, capable of >) thanks man..!
speaking in terms of psychology. the way is sees it, one can trick the mind. by edging, especially! if any sexual occurence is present during the dream.
this will make me blast aload off in my dream, and that way i won’t have to deal with it when i am awake and alert and or aware… >P and it does not give me any of those bad feelings or affects me in a bad way… or, so it seems… >P
my main problem is that i got a bad feeling after spanking the monkey, i did get to feel bad about myself and lost my confidence and what not,
today i’ve felt no difference or change in my inner state of mind even tho i ejaculated in a dream. it must really be all in my head know?
eventually i may do a little edging now and then, but i have no intention of going back to the old habbits, degrading myself with porn and self satisfaction no more…
well.. one can only take one step after the other, erh!?
maybe one day i’ll have some views that are kind of similar to yours!
one step of the time, ooooone step of the time…! >)
I’m still in the game day 11. Haven’t noticed much differences yet. Still not gonna fap tho.
Is it better to abstain for 7 days and lets say on day 8 you ejacualte? Or do you have to stay abstain for as long as you can? I get it that you will get the peak on day 7 after abstaining from masturbating. So if you abstain for as long as you can, this will happen again on day 14 and so on?
Furthermore, great article! Got me really thinking about it all.
Try cold showering on day 7 to see if that knocks it up even further.
I was just wondering. What is the objective for most periodical abstainers here? I know that the title of the article implies that the goal is to attract women. That I view as a welcome side-effect, whereas being able to get it up more or less effortlessly is the main goal. Women are attracted to me like flies to sugar 3-4 days after shooting it, but that doesn’t help my ED (that I would label as PED).
In my twenties I had a sexdrive that sometimes compelled me to shoot many times a day, but often as a stress relief. Now that I’m more sure of myself (or numb emotionally) I am very relaxed, having sudden surges of libido, but far apart. I lift weights up to 5 days a week, at 35 I have the physique of a 25-year-old, eat nutritious food. What restricts me from hitting on girls is my previous failures in bed, both the ED and from the confusion about what counts as normal sex, which leaves me inoperational physically.
@mattias whatever feels right for your penis.
Can very much relate to Mattias, if you are worried about ED, I would suggest focusing on the 16 errogeneous zones of a women and getting her off that way. If you can at least pleasure her, it is a start. The extra oomph I have got in the gym from doing this has been great I am coming up for 42 in a few months and am getting stronger at the gym, leg pressed around 265 kg tonight and am natural, most of my lifts are increasing plus I don’t train with a spotter.
@Ed any emotional or mental changes?
Yeah for sure, at the moment I am a little tired, that probably has more to do with the fact I workout at night which has not been ideal for my sleeping patterns. The women I do engage seem more into me and I don’t mind expressing how I feel if I find a women appealing.
I’ve never made it past day 8, but has anyone one found it extremely hard to concentrate around day 5-8 due to the fact that your mind is constantly thinking about sex? My built up frustration causes me to lose focus on aspects of my life that need to be maintained such as chores etc.
@Rave
I can just tell you that this stuff is more likely to happen if you edge or look at porn without doing anything. If you don’t do either of those, just sit through it.
Heres how i think about it if you get horny just think about how bad you feel after you pmo and think of how good youll feel after the horniness passes
@Alpha>beta That’s what I do. I simply close my eyes and have an imaginary fap session and after I have an imaginary ejaculation i feel guilty….
Day 14
I kind of nearly lapsed with the edging the other day. Not enough to break the cycle.
i feel more tired when i am doing twise a day , that so i searched here , from this i will follow 7 day cycle…
On the 22 of May I’ll will have 60 days of no fapping. It isnt that hard, but I think im ready to start a 7 day cycle after that. Its normal to release once in a while.
Now that i have been through this, i dont know from where all the “deep voice” and “extreme”confidence comes from. Because it doesnt. It’s all in your mind. Ive experienced these 1-2 days after I read this forum..and they never returned again
@Meme
Wow that is a long time..so what have been the benefits of this since you have started? What have you noticed?
Thanks!
day 17 for me, I’ve got a lustful glare from a girl today. I got my ass kicked by a couple girls too.
@Black abstainer
What benefits have you noticed after bypassing 2 weeks? I’ve never made it that far.
@ Priv
Benefits after 60 days ?Hmm.. I can say that I do have some more confidence in me as my dopamine receptors are returning to normal. Some of my shyness has gone away and I’m slowly becoming indifferent to a lot of things. However as told before, there is no deep voice or any other exaggerated things. Girls won’t notice you more, you will start noticing them looking at you.
And yes I get pretty horny if I stare to much at a woman, you need to keep you mind and eyes somewhere else.
God I miss a hot piece of ass…..
I know this works, I am at a stage where I wish I was out sarging consistantly. Sometimes the intensity of horniness really builds up. I get a service every few weeks and kind of did something I wish I hadn’t, no real harm done I guess, all it means is that I should be out sarging, escorts aren’t really the real deal, only a short term fix.
***** relapsed on day 20.
This is something i have been very interested in for a 2 -3 years now, im now 24 and have been cuttin down on jerkin off from one a day to less and less, the last 11 weeks i have achieved 1 wank per week “7 day cycle tuesdays my fun day haha” and i think there is definatly something in it, seem to become more self aware, and in situations at work in a bar/club, noticing things more clearer like social dynamics, and where and why i and others fit into the social dynamics, becomes clearer which guys r just aplha and the girls want and I have become more aware and motivated to improve my status. As for energy increases and big gains at gym, not really noticed to much tbh in the strength gain department, however on the 5th to 7th day of absinece feel more energetic and feel the build up of not realeasing. tuesdays coming up once more and im gonna try lasting out till the tuesday after so it will be 14 days, just to see if i get greater noticable changes. reason 4 doing 7 is think its ust healthy to clean ure pipes and keep sexually active/ obviuosly that would be preferbly with sex, which despite an increase in going out last 5 weeks or so, havent had extra encounters or distinct greater interest in girls. this however i hope could be due to the fact i still have 1-4 reasonbly excesive porn days, 1-3 hours viewing sexually related material online, this in itself withought jerking off does great damage i dont feel like being social right afterwards, and feel bad for watching it. So porn is now my main target to complety avoid as i believe this has effected my alpha being and social proserping. In conclusion jerk off once a week only you will get benifits (possibly goin withought even longer or completly no fap could achieve greater results) personally il be discovering the result of this over next 10 days or so, but also you must ditch the porn id say complety for ultimate social success and should help be more naturally attractive to females. Seperate note female masturbation my view, the hottest girls very often masturbate daily to multiple times a day, but also youl find hot girl who never does it, ie, if a female was to abstain from masturbation i doubt she would get any particular gains, maybe im wrong…..
I have lived 40 some even years. And I can tell you many things that relate to all that you all have kindly shared. I love the internet and not Television or movies. Propaganda is evil. And TV and Radio practices this all the time. Just like the movie “Something about mary”. A BIG LIE. Truth is prevailing with the WWW. People can now hear truth if you filter it correctly and find facts to back it. I was in the Army. In the Army, I ws so deprived of sex due to being out in the “field” or “deployed” that I learned that refraining from masturbation was an aid to a man/soldier. You are stronger physically and mentally. You are faster, more ambitious about life and it’s challenges to the point, at least for me, I felt nothing was impossible. Then I got out honorably. Life starting going down hill. Porn and masturbation and being alone was a VIRUS. But once I started to have serious sexual relationships (women) in my life. It didn’t really matter if I ejaculated as long as it was “real” sex not masturbation. Something occurs when you have the “right” partner” and something bad occurs when you have a “negative, bad” partner. I had one woman, who wanted sex more than me. And she was a negative evil woman. Who drained my balls dry as much as she could to make me lazy, fat, and have no drive for life. You have to be careful my brothers in choosing a mate. Then I went to an episode of solitude, internet porn as much as I desired. I masturbated 4-7 times a day. I couldn’t sleep. I had no ambition. I avoided women, I avoided exercise, etc, etc.
Then I learned about abstinence from a friend from South Africa. He told everyone without shame, that he didn’t masturbate and I found it interesting as he “chuckled” at those who made fun of him, I did not. Now, I know years later after that moment, that refraining from masturbation for 7 days. (A wonderful number for many things in life). That women are attracted to me, come to me, they rub their breast or tail on me at the clubs as I just stand and watch the dance floor. Wives want me, yes wives. I am against adultery. But it happens and I treat married women like a virus. And I got more active, started to feel better, look better in the face, in my eyes (a sparkle than wasn’t there before), and I got more creative. There are so many benefits from refraining and having self control. My recommendation. Do it for yourself. Don’t believe my words, try it. One step at a time. 3 days, 6 days, 7 days, 9 days, until you hear your body telling you that this number of days is right for me and my life. If you lack “balls” to speak with beautiful attractive women. STOP MASTURBATING EVERYDAY!. And as one other poster mentioned. There is a con. Other males will get aggressive with you and compete like animals in a jungle killing for the hunt of pussy. I like the 7 day cycle. It is perfect. All of this is in the Bible and Jesus himself spoke about it. I am not pushing religion. But wise men know. Ghandi, Ali, Jesus, Budda, etc, etc. Good luck.
@Meme
My deeper, fuller voice is largely due to my penile exercises I think, making the balls bigger and such. Massage for more bloodflow. I masturbated excessively in my teens and I suspect that this halted the build-up of semen down there, because I emptied too often, making my testicles smaller than they would’ve been otherwise. I have much less energy at the gym on days 1-3 after ejaculation, on 4th day I’m back in business…
@ Black abstainer
You said “whatever feels right for your penis.” That’s easy for you to say. Blacks generally are not frequent masturbators, am I right? Well, I have masturbated to perverted porn for years and years, so a naked girl is not enough to make IT stiff anymore. Desensitized. That’s what i’m trying to remedy.
PS. I do get more attention from girls when I have abstained for 3+ days. It’s very apparent.
@ Black Abstainer how did you feel throughout your 20 day ordeal
did 3weeks+ and then simply busted one, I must say this increases your awareness, not people around you, you do, however learn something from this (and know it even after busting one). I am going to continue abstaining.
Also it IS a proven fact that abstaining increases your testosterone levels, but we are talking about 30day as a minimum abstaining, all this 7day cycle is a joke.
I have discovered pretty much everything by myself, but thanks to this comment section I know how other people approach it. It might be different for different people, or they might just not realise it. All in all, good luck to you guys, I won’t be following this ‘forum’ anymore. Lesson learned.
@Cool
I personally agree with the fact that Abstianing long without a release within 3 or 4 week period does increase your awareness significantly. I personally found when I’m at home or at work I can handle a multitude of tasks much more efficiently.
Memory
I found when I was in my teens I had a poor memory, and by self pleasuring my 3 or 4 times a day it had made it worse, and now I can see why I was at the back of the class and slow in catching on in life it’s self , and dreary and lazy and low in spirit
Health
Now a man in my mid 40s I’m alway suffering with a low immune system and even from the time I started self pleasuring myself at the age of 13 due pair pressure, and when I left school back in the 80s with no job I was always at home not wanting socialise with anyone And of corse self plearuring myself 5 to 6 times a day and totally unaware of what was happening to me, at one time I busted 20 time in one night. Today I’m not so bad now, compared to how I used to be back in my teens and think it was the worst thing that could happen to me in my life. I feel like half of my life has squandered on self pleasuring as a teen starting puberty, when I could of been making a success of myself.
Further more I’d like thank everyone who has contributed their thouhts, and sharing their and comments on this site and I hope this site can be beneficial to those who are seeking help
I am finding this forum a trendendous source of strength. The cooler weather tends to make me much hornier, and have been edging on the brink so to speak. Technically I haven’t lapsed but hearing the comments from other guys on this forum is a real source of strength. I am getting back to the gym this week after a week’s break so that should help a bit.