On Wednesday evening, I get home from work and notice I have a voice mail on my phone. I listen to it.
“Hey Matt, this is Wing Woman. I hope you don’t mind me calling, I got your number from Wingman Stick. Listen, me and Crazy Girl are going out tomorrow and you NEED to come with us. We are going to get you laid, if it’s the last thing we do. Call me back, bye.”
Interesting.
I call Wing Woman back and chat with her. We agree that we will be rocking out on Thursday night and that she would help me pick-up women.
Now, for those of you who haven’t been following the blog, Wing Woman is currently seeing my best friend, Wingman Stick. Crazy Girl is Wing Woman’s best friend. These two girls, Wingman Stick and I have all gone out on several occasions in the last month because we all seem to have a really fun time together.
Ok, fast forward to Thursday night.
I meet up with Wing Woman and Crazy Girl at College Bar. It’s early still, so we get some drinks and sit down. Then Crazy Girl asks me something that has been sitting heavily on my mind since last night.
“So tell me, what type of girl are you looking for?”
“Hmmm, interesting question. I guess I don’t really have a type, I’m not very picky.”
“That’s bullshit. Everyone is attracted to certain types of people more than others.”
“No really, I am attracted to all types of different women.”
“Well how do you expect to find someone if you don’t know what you want?”
This last line really shook me to the core. I haven’t really thought about what I am looking for in a women or what my type is. It’s just something that I never really thought was important in meeting women. My thinking has always been that when I find someone I really like, then that’s my type. Perhaps I’ll think about this more later.
Eventually, the DJ starts playing his tunes and we decide to hit the dance floor.
At first, I use my fierce dance skills to swing and maneuver Wing Woman and Crazy Girl around the floor. Then after an hour of tearing it up, I find myself in a group of cute young college girls. I start dancing with each of them. We are all having a great time.
Later on while still dancing, I feel someone grab my hand and pull me to the side of the dance floor. It is Wing Woman. We start dancing, but not the fast paced, peppy stuff from earlier. This dance is a bit more…seductive. Things start to get physical as our hands and legs invade each other’s territory. She gives me that look…you know…THE look. This is not good.
I snap out of it. I back off from Wing Woman and go to the bar to cool off, realizing that I’m getting a bit too steamy with my best friend’s girl. If there is one thing that I value above anything else in my life, it is my friends. There is no way that I’d ever cheat on a friend.
After some time of getting my head straightened out, I make way back to the dance floor in the hopes of attracting some of the other lovely ladies. I approach a few more women and dance with them but by this time I’m just getting too exhausted and have a hard time staying focused.
Eventually my tiredness is too much and it is time to call it a night. I tell Wing Woman that I really have to go and then get out of there as fast as I can.
I can’t help but think that Wing Woman had an ulterior motive tonight. Here is why I believe that she likes me:
- I found out that she didn’t even bother inviting Wingman Stick
- Over the past few weeks she has been much more flirty with me than normal
- She didn’t help me meet women like she said but just the opposite. She was dragging me away from women to dance with her most of the night.
- Here’s the clincher. She said, “Don’t tell Wingman Stick about tonight.”
So, I obviously have a complicated little mess on my hands. I’m thinking that it might be best to steer clear from her for awhile, which could be difficult considering she is always with Wingman Stick. What’s a guy supposed to do?
{ 14 comments… read them below or add one }
Hey Savage,
Sounds like Wing Woman sarged you!
But you chose the high ground and are a man of your principles, good for you. Does Wingman Stick read your blog? If so, you’ve just started a shit storm. Good luck with this one!
~The Saint
Been there done that. Don’t ask me why, but the unattainable or “do not touch” ones are always the most desirable.
I think it goes along with the “bad boy” type who you want to bed so very much, even though you know they will break your heart.
If I were you I would keep your distance or your friendship could be ruined.
This phase may pass. Good luck!
Matt,
The stuff about “type” is bullshit. Some people have a “type”, some people do NOT. I do NOT have a type. I know what I want in a man but it has very little to do with physical attributes and specific styles.
I love men. I’ve dated all types and although I have preferences it has little to do with type. If I say “He’s not my type.” it means I do not want to date him.
Wing Women advice: stay away from her unless Wingman Stick is there. And call her on her shit. If she flirts with you say “Hey, you’re flirting with me. I find it odd/uncomfortable/inappropriate/lame/
_______ (Fill in the blank).” Neg or acknowledge inappropriate behavior. It’s socially awkward for a girlfriend to hit on her boyfriend’s friends. PERIOD. And ignoring it or glossing over it is not going to help.
Shit storm or not, whether you tell Wingman Stick or not is up to you. I won’t pass judgment. I just have two cliche to throw at you: “Do unto other as you want done unto you” and “Integrity is doing the right thing even if it’s difficult”. The rest is up to you.
I don’t envy you,
Ana
Saint,
No Wingman Stick does not know about this blog so hopefully I can avoid any type of shit storm!
Suze,
It is kind of weird how we desire things that we cannot or should not have.
Ana,
I think agree with you about the “type” thing. I’ve been thinking about this and I truly believe that I do not have a “type”.
As for what to do in this Wing Woman/Wingman Stick situation is still up in the air. I’m hoping it’ll just go away but something tells me it won’t be that easy…
-Matt
We women can be so wicked sometimes. It’s never a good thing when someone says, “Don’t tell my boyfriend.” Definately up to no good. Too bad, she sounds like otherwise a great friend!!
Keep your distance, I admire your ethics. Like ana said dont go anywhere with her without him. Tell her straight up its not an option. Dont say anything to him, it may backfire, your an adult handle it. Keep her in check. I am sorry your little group just got complicated.
She definitely had alterior motives.
Honestly, since you are such a stand up guy I would tell Wingman stick. He is your best friend so you want him to be treated like this by a girl like her? It’s disrespectful.
Ok, I’m totally not all high and mighty like that… but, it’s probably the best approach, other than staying away from the she-devil.
On the flip side, I bet you could have gotten a threesome out of her… if you were a creep of course.
Damn morals.
She didn’t overtly hit on you, so she still has plausible deniability. Don’t tell your boy. Like the others have said, hang with her only when he’s out with you.
Good to see you’re taking the high ground, too.
As for knowing what your “type” is, don’t have a type. Have STANDARDS. Know what you like—and use that when qualifying them. Your game will take a jump.
Ugh. I say tell the friend… save the guy from a vile bitch. If she’s willing to do something so obviously wretched, what else is she game for, you know? I hope he’s using condoms, for the obvious reasons…
Of course, that also implies that you would have to explain why you went out with his girl and waited so long to tell him about it… it’s gotten to the point where he’s going to feel like an ass, either way.
Personally, if she tried any shit like that again, I would go out with her and immediately call him. Let her get busted and let him see that you DO have his back. That’s what friends are for. And she’s no friend.
“With friends like that, who needs enemies?”
I know this is an older post, but I was compelled to comment anyway… First, its truly refreshing to know that there are young guys out there that were raised right, and actually have moral values.
As for Wing Woman, she is a control freak, and is obviously lacking in the self respect category. She is threatened by your friendship with Wingman, and so she is testing you.
Didn’t you see the red flag when she invited you? Or did you just assume it was including Wingman? If the 4 of you had all kicked it before, why did it take until the club to find out the intentions of Wing Woman? The very second she said “Don’t tell Wingman” you should have said, “Thats my Boy, we don’t have secrets” She was asking you to set the limits, and you may have given her an unclear answer…
She definitely had ulterior motives. And, as far as types, I only had types when I was only attracting a girl here and there as an AFC. Fact is, my type was always the girl that bothered to hit on ME. Now I have my choice, I find I like different things in different people, from looks to smarts. It all depends.
By the way….
Forgot to mention:
I also DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES hit anything my friends have even remotely touched, regardless of the friend either. There are so many women out there, why cause the trouble?
One test I do is “Am I introducing this woman INTO my social circle?” If yes, I’m pretty safe.
I was surprised how many friends, PUA and AFC alike, thought my rule was stupid.
Let me bang their ex’s and see what they think then.
Hi Verbal,
Thanks for the comments. Since this, I have also adopted a similar rule of not going anywhere near my friend’s girls even if they are ex’s. You are right, there are so many women out there that it is kind of stupid to cause problems in your social circle over a friends ex girlfriend.
-Matt
Fuck her dude…
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