December 2006

Thursday - Local Bar Holiday Party

Approach 24: I was talking with some buddies when I catch the gaze of a cute HB8 at the bar. She keeps giving me side-ways glances the whole time I’m talking. Eventually, one of my buddies makes a comment which everyone around us hears including the HB:

Buddy: hey, do you guys smell puke?
Buddy2: yea i do actually, I can’t tell if it is puke or something else
Savage: (point to HB and engage her) hey, did you guys puke over here?
HB: (laughs) no, I didn’t puke, but it could be the whiskey shot I just ordered that you are smelling
Savage: oh that could be it. I’m surprised you are drinking something that smells so bad
HB: (laughs again) yea but it tastes soooo good
Savage: haha, fair enough (I give her a smile and resume talking to my friends)

Later on as she was leaving the bar, she came up to me to say good bye and that she’d see me around. Nice.

Friday - Local Bar with Live Bands

I had a lot of approach anxiety this night for some reason, but managed to get in three tough approaches.

Approach 25: A girl at the bar is ordering next to me. I ask her if she knows any of the bands and if they are any good. She says she doesn’t know and ejects as soon as she gets her drinks.

Approach 26: A bit later, two other girls approach the bar to order and I try to give them advice on which beer they should order. They look at me like I’m a retard and sarcastically say, “yea buddy thanks for the advice.” Ouch!

Approach 27: I’m standing by the stage at the end of the night and their is an HB near me. I ask her if she is the president of the fan club (referring to the band that is playing). She laughs a bit and says that she just likes their sound. I try chit chatting for a bit but she is too distracted by the band so I eject.

Saturday - Local Pub

Approach 28: I’m standing near the bar and as an HB is ordering her drink I give her a simple, “Hi, what’s your name?” We introduce each other and I tell her some jokes, etc. She invites me to come sit down with her and her guy roommate. This is where things started falling apart. Though I was still getting good rapport with the HB, the guy roommate kept trying to tool on me. I ended up spending the rest of the night deflecting his hidden insults. I ended up just saying it was nice to meet them and left.

Summary

I didn’t get a lot of approaches in this weekend. I really need to step up the approaching if I’m even going to come close to my goal. I’m only a quarter of the way finished with only seven days left in the month. Time to drop the hammer.

Thursday - Mall Sarging

I finally made it back to the mall again. This time with much better results. I left work and arrived at the mall around 5:45pm. By 6:15 things were looking like a repeat of the last mall sarge (3 hrs of walking around with no approaches). I was almost on the verge of giving up again, when I decided to go into the Yankee Candle store to buy a gift for my mom.

Approach 19: While smelling the different scents of the various candles I notice a cute HB8 standing next to me doing the same thing. One…two….three…..

Savage: Oh you don’t want that one (pointing to candle she’s holding), that one is no good.
HB8: Oh really, I can’t tell anymore, I’ve been smelling too many candles
Savage: Ah right, you’re going into sensory overload, I know the feeling. Here try this one, it’s really good (I hand her another candle, vanilla cupcake scent). This is probably the best scent in the whole store.
HB8: Wow, the best one huh?
Savage: Oh yea, it’s definitely in my top 3 of all time (smiling)
HB8: haha, ok I’ll think about it. (she walks away)

I continue looking around and just as I’m about to check out, HB8 re-opens me! She walked up to me with two different candles in her hands (one of them vanilla cupcake) and asked me which one she should get. I told her to definitely go with the vanilla cupcake one and she agreed. At this point I was so elated that I couldn’t get anymore conversation in. She thanked me for my help and checked out.

This one approach turned the whole night around. Just when I was about to give up I bang out a really good approach. I’m not kidding that after this, I felt like I was on a high or something. I felt so good that I decided to keep pushing for more approaches.

Approach 20: I walked into a clothing store and approached a cute HBasian. I said “hi” and then asked her if she knew where I could find a good tailor. She told me where there were a few places that she knew of. I asked her which one was the best but she couldn’t really say. I thanked her for her help and ejected.

Approach 21: I was in the Barnes and Noble and noticed this HB with a very familiar scarf on, so I quickly approached:

Savage: Hi, um excuse me, but I was wondering where you got that scarf from?
HB: my scarf? why do you want to know?
Savage: Oh well, it’s just that I seem to see a bunch of people wearing that particular scarf but I never see it being sold anywhere.
HB: ah well I got this one in Ireland
Savage: Do you remember the name of the store?
HB: oh well it’s not one in the U.S. so I’m not sure where everyone gets them from.
Savage: oh I see, well I guess it’ll remain a mystery then (smiling). Nice talking to you.
HB: Bye (smiles)

Approach 22: I’m in the Olympia Sports store looking at some winter hats. An HB is walking by me and I quickly blurt out:

Savage: Hey, what do you think of these winter hats with the little rims on them?
HB: (giggles) A lot of people seem to be wearing them these days
Savage: Yea you’re right, they are a bit trendy. I better not buy one (smiling).

She giggles again and walks away.

Approach 23: I’m starting to get tired and decide to just hit up the information booth for a quick easy approach before leaving. There are two young HBs sitting at the booth. I ask them if there is a good tailor around and how I need to find someone who can alter jeans well. They give me a bunch of suggestions and are a bit flirty. I flirt back, thank them for their help and eject.

Summary

It’s funny how just one simple approach can motivate you to keep going. After that first approach in the candle store it felt much easier to get in the other four approaches. I’m really glad I stuck in there. I feel like I really accomplished something today. Not to mention I feel a bit vindicated after the last mall attempt. I was at the mall tonight for about 2 hours and got the five approaches, much better than 3 hours with 0 approaches! I’m feeling good and think I can really start racking these approaches up to reach my goal. Maybe I’ll try to do the mall again tomorrow so I don’t lose this momentum.

Saturday - The Mall

I’m not going to lie. I spent three hours walking around a busy mall and I didn’t make one single approach. I was under the impression that day game would be much easier than night game. It didn’t seem so in this case. I was just plain nervous and every time I thought about approaching I turned into a nervous wreck. I think it’s time to start making better use of the 3 second rule so I won’t have time to think about it.

Saturday - At The Bar

Ok, the bar sarging turned out to be exponentially more successful then my mall attempt. During the first 30 minutes of entering the bar I was able to get four approaches in and even more by the end of the night. Also, I had a ton of fun, which certainly helped with my vibing.

Approach 12: After checking my coat, I noticed that everyone in this particular room was more dressed up in formal attire than other rooms in the bar. There was a HB near me so I just went up to her and asked, “why is everyone so dressed up down here?” She definitely didn’t want anything to do with me because her answer didn’t even make sense saying, “oh yea right.” WTF. She quickly fled the scene. I’m assuming her mind was distracted at the time of my approach or she has ADD.

Approach 13: Me and wingman Stick are standing in the middle of the room. I notice a four set standing next to us so I quickly approach not knowing what I’m going to open with. I ask one of the HBs if there is some sort of Christmas party going on. She tells me that it is indeed a private party and I probably shouldn’t be down here. Haha, we crashed a party, nice! I say that I’ll try to stick around and joke that I know her now so it is ok to be there. She introduces me to her friends who seem to be more receptive to my banter. I introduce them to wingman Stick. We all have a conversation for a bit but it eventually fizzles out with an awkward silence, so I ejected knowing I could always re-approach later on.

Approach 14: I’m waiting at the bar trying to order some drinks. I spot a HB out of the corner of my eye. She is standing behind me, also waiting to order a drink. I turn around and say,

Savage: it looks like it might be a bit of a wait for drinks
HB: oh no
Savage: I’ll keep you occupied while we wait. so, are you friends with the host?
HB: not really, I only know her through other friends. You?
Savage: oh, I’m kind of the same, I’m a friend of a friend of a friend. Actually, I probably shouldn’t even be here.

She immediately jumps into small talk, asking me all kinds of questions, “where you from? what do you do? etc.” (IOI). We talk about this stuff for a bit until some alpha guy at the bar interrupts me. He noticed that I had been waiting forever to get my drinks and motions for me to take his spot so I can get the bartenders attention. I took his spot because I did want to get my drinks, figuring I could re-initiate with the HB. At first I thought the alpha guy was trying to cock block me but he seemed like he was just trying to be nice.

Approach 15: After moving to the spot at the bar and finally getting my drink order in I turned to another HB who was sitting next to me and said,

Savage: Hey is this supposed to be some sort of Christmas party?
HB: uh oh, you mean you weren’t invited! (smiling)
Savage: ummm, oh….actually, I was. I’m friends with…umm….Bill. You know, Bill from accounting? (said in a joking way)
HB: Ohhh right…..Bill from Accounting, huh? How do you know him?
Savage: Me and Bill, we go wayyyyy back. We’re real tight. (still joking)
HB: haha, ok, well it was nice meeting you. (she turns and continues talking to her other friends.)

Approach 16: We decided to leave the party section of the bar for a bit because we had to meet up with two old college friends (LJBFs). After meeting up with them in the main bar area we told them that they should come with us to infiltrate the Christmas party in the other room. They agreed and we went to go but had to wait in line to get back in!

While waiting in the line a really cute HB jumped in the line behind me. I turned around and greeted her with a simple, “Hi”. I told her I’d keep her company while we waited. She turned out to be very flirty as we joked around with each other. I even got in some good kino on her arms and back. Unfortunately we got separated once we entered the party room.

Approach 17: The party had picked up quite a bit and there were tons of people dancing. We got onto the dance floor with the LJBFs and I started getting jiggy with it. There was a group of 5 HBs dancing near us. I locked eye contact with one HB8 and extended my arm out motioning for her to take my hand. She did. I twirled her around and started doing my seductive dance thing with her. She gets really into it and is kinoing me like crazy.

While dancing, the HB8 whispers in my ear that it’s her friends birthday. I ask which one and she says the girl in the pink. I walk up to HBpink, grab her hand and twirl her a few times. Then I give her a quick kiss on the cheek and say, “happy birthday!”. She was a bit shocked by this at first but then decided to attack me with her dancing. HBpink is grinding up on me and then her friend, HB8, starts grinding me from behind so that I am now in a HB sandwich…..and it was pretty good;)

I danced with these HBs for the next 20 minutes. Eventually the bar was closing and the bouncers were kicking people out. I tried number closing HB8 but she said she had a fiancee and gave me a final compliment saying that I was a terrific dancer.

Approach 18: We get a cab to go home but decide to stop at one of our local pubs for last call. At the pub, there weren’t many people, but did manage to open a two set of girls sitting down at a table. I told them my revolving door story and some jokes. By this time it was pretty late and I was tired so I politely ejected and went home.

Summary

The attempt at sarging at the mall was a failure but I made some real progress later in the night with seven cold approaches. The first few approaches of the night really got me warmed up for approaching later on. Also, I was doing a lot of flirting with the LJBFs and think I could potentially escalate with one of them. At least things are progressing and I am getting my approach count up.

Thursday - After work drinks

Wasn’t going to go out sarging today because I was just too tired from work but a coworker eventually managed to drag me out for a couple of drinks.

Approach 7: A HB comes up to the bar next to me and orders a cranberry vodka. I make fun of her drink saying that it is a shirley temple. She leaves to go back to her friends but touches my arm as she is leaving (IOI). About two minutes later she comes back up to order another drink. I bust on her saying that she was chugging her drinks just so she could come back to talk to me. She claimed the last drink was for her friend. I tease her for being a whino. She leaves again and touches my arm again (another IOI). By this time my coworker friend wants to hit another bar so we bounce.

Approach 8: We are sitting at the bar and there is an HB with her boyfriend sitting next to us. My friend starts talking to the boyfriend about some random stuff so I decide to open the HB while he is distracted. I ask to get her opinion about how a guy is supposed to get the door for a woman at a revolving door and tell her one of my DHV stories. She was responding back to me but I could tell by her body language that she didn’t want anything to do with me. Eventually, her boyfriend tells her they are leaving. Guess I scared him off:)

Friday - Rock Show

This was a fun night, however, I feel guilty for not approaching the many HBs that were present. I managed to get in 3 approaches but really given all the opportunities it should have been more.

Approach 9: We were standing next to a group of three HBs. I hesitated for the longest time until my friend actually physically pushed me into the set. I opened with something about the lead singer of the band being Rachel Ray’s husband (which was true) but it came out really bad. Luckily the girls were polite and receptive to what I was trying to say. It was clear I was going down in flames so I ejected.

Approach 10: Me and my wing, Stick, approached a group of women by the bar. He opened one HB while I opened another. I used the Rachel Ray comment again and they ate it up (pun intended). We ended up merging the two separate conversations into one big conversation about cooking and how Rachel Ray is “such a bitch”, haha. Eventually, the final band was coming on so we decided to get closer to the stage bringing one of these women with us (I think Stick ended up hooking up with her).

Approach 11: I was standing right in front of the stage rocking out when two HBs came over and stood next to me. I don’t know what it was but I had no fear on this one. I immediately opened the girl, can’t remember exactly what I said, something about the band being really good, bla bla bla. Next thing I know, we are dancing together, and kinoing each other. I kept trying to escalate the kino but her friend eventually dragged her away. Oh well.

Summary

I am still getting that fear in the pit of stomach every time I want to approach. This fear is what is holding me back from approaching massive amounts of women. Here’s the thing though, I don’t know why I’m afraid. Every approach so far hasn’t been bad at all. There hasn’t been any massive rejections or hard blows to my self esteem. In fact, once I do manage to open I seem to get comfortable having a conversation pretty quickly. I’ll have to figure this out and fight the fear. In the mean time, I’m off to the mall to do some day approaches.